“Why did not call at once?”
Several minutes later eyes began to stick together, but Klot did not fall down. It was necessary to rise, stop senseless lying on a sofa and to switch off the TV. Fighting about catalepsy, he nevertheless walked behind the panel to a bedside table, interrupted the scenes which are not perceived by it long ago.
Night was given silent, not too frosty. Alexander constantly woke up captured by muddy dreams from the childhood. They disturbed to a shower and did not admit why they press, than disturb. Thin thread of answers continually escaped consciousness, leaving a bitter deposit. The memoirs awakened by dreams belonged to long ago left when Alexander still trusted in the future, but did not consider splinters of the dream. It came later disappointment, and there was nothing to wait, but there were verses, it is unknown from where coming: roofing felts he composed them, somewhere heard roofing felts and remembered, and perhaps, the father who is taking away further and further the child in the wood continued to read them.
Rising in a bed on elbows, Klot looked out of the window: there, where filled in by the moon, the Thunder dozed. The small snowball Pripuskatsya, softly laid down on shaggy wool. Snowflakes did not thaw from heat of his body more largely and gradually covered a dog with a blanket, giving it special picturesqueness. In yellow reflections of heaven the ice kristallik which hung in mid-air were poured. Illusive snow came to life, was amused, danced on the sleeping animal. Sometimes, concerned by a far sound, the Thunder swelled up and long listened attentively, nobody cancelled its service. Having convinced of lack of danger, he angrily bit into a chain, trying to have a bite it. It was torn here and there in hope to break off rings or a collar. By down the street the freedom-loving mongrels who are skillfully darting about noses under snow, trying to discover livelihood ran. They quickly ate found and went further. Were behind turn, went to the unknown distances. Bark broke on howl – the Thunder, envied all of them heart, realizing as its own world consisting of the gone to pieces house and the duty assigned to it fastened with an impressive chain is small. The award – two bowls of porridge a day – tasteless, hardly supporting vital forces, food, of course, was due to it for deprivations. Soon, without being a fool, perfectly understanding that behind turn of the street for it there is nothing, the Thunder found rest. To adapt to new was late.
The dream was gone. Having groped the panel under a pillow, Alexander turned on the TV again. There was no wish to rise and go to a desk. And again sudden thoughts interrupted a movie plot, then unexpectedly receded in anywhere, returning to events on the screen.
“I will buy a new chain on a saw, and that when still will be given. Old to work already there is no urine …, chews a tree. Ah you! Forgot to grease with fat”, – the guy in a bed jumped up and it was right there settled back. – Tomorrow since morning …. Quicker morning. Rusts. Can descend now? Yes who will let? Protection will banish. Night. It is rather morning”.
It was worth covering eyes and before them there were platforms covered with the turned black stubs, new sites of trees which just should be cut out seemed.
“I receive for everyone on twenty. … And if to try, I will be able to bring down thirty in change. It, how many money!” – calculations excited, poured in adrenaline in a body, prevented to fall asleep. There was a wish to get to work right now. “Tomorrow day off, I will not grease in any way, – the disturbing thought pulled out from the rising somnolence. – Can descend, will let? No. Since morning on building, till a lunch I will definitely not be in time, and after will not let”, – it was necessary – to reconcile one and, regretting for the ruined tool, to wait for Tuesday. But everything was not so badly, the consolation was quickly – on the building site salary time also came: “So, to one o’clock in the afternoon I will be in the market…”.
– It was given me to look late, – in the morning everything repeated again.
He tried to remember that he watched the day before, looked for justifications to the sleep debt. It was not. The most part of the last night passed behind mechanical browsing of channels and in empty dreams.
Overcoming stomach resistance, Alexander as always drank opposite coffee and went to darkness. During daily, and therefore in time to turn into an infinite way, roads the silence unostentatiously filled the head with dreams (if, of course, weather was silent, and it was not required to direct all efforts on overcoming its whims). Visions, at times bright and colourful, sometimes avaricious and stiffened, crashed into its world, expanding, forced out from it the ordinary. Benefits, sulimy were presented to Klot by achievement of goals; time when need of daily fight against elements, a sleep debt disappears, immemorial requirement somewhere to go, to submit to someone. Again and again Alexander remembered how yesterday it was possible, it is though a little, to sit behind a desk. It touched, compared the narrations to the samples of high long ago read, being. Today it was thought, as at it it turns out. … Successful phrases of own composition were one by one remembered: “Will soon argue, discuss me”.
Alexander saw the victory reached for the sake of Lita, the barriers which failed thanks to universal recognition. In detail their future house appeared, each trifle of a smart interior – joint happiness was noticed: the pools, brilliant cars, flower glades broken before windows. And after – death. Of course, it will leave the first, having left everything saved up to Lita – considerable riches. Then tiresome journalists, will open for her darling in new light, will show the present, unknown Alexander hitherto. Then the girl will think with whom she shared lot, will blaze with pride with regret impurity (late understood, underestimated, did not make bigger for his adoration), will begin to tell the world as Alexander created, what person! The grief and commitment, pain for the whole world were reflected in his eyes during the uncountable hours spent by the genius behind a desk. All will open how that was behind external simplicity great, gone to centuries, but installed in hearts and memory forever. The same who laughed and did not believe in his talent will bite the evil tongues. Naturally, will compare the triumph reached by it rattling worldwide to the scanty victories about which nobody knows which mean nothing and at all are necessary to nobody. Envious persons will live for themselves; so-so will live. And he will live for others, and it is beautiful to live, without refusing anything to itself.
He also saw own funeral, is not clear as and Klot and did not think of similar subtleties; to them it was not allocated the place among visited romantics of death. Reverentially observed the companions who are solemnly bearing its coffin; as behind with the hung heads thousands and thousands of admirers go. “What genius…, one for century is”, – familiar critics and writers whisper. Silently, in tears there are women, girls. They mourn it in own way, are killed that was not dolyubit, to it did not give the rest of something. … Ask supreme about the second chance, but already late. Many notice on a solemn quiet face of Alexander, lips which stiffened in a soft smile the mysterious press, same as on faces of the great poets in last hour who went to eternity put it near them, and at times even above and more significantly …. The orchestra overstrains, sobbings of crowd amplify. Someone, without constraining tears, delivers a sincere speech. Extols the dead, reproaches live – did not save, did not estimate. But everyone believes that Klot does not remember the evil, otherwise great people also cannot, they rise over usual mortal, forgive them their defects and mistakes ….
The represented picture turned out so real that Alexander for a minute believed in it, began to pant, he sincerely wished that all and happened. It was so pleasant to imagine the death, to feel how, at last, recognize you unfairly offended, will regret and estimated.
Then it came back to live, passion as there was a wish to look at faces being while, having developed the newspaper, they will notice its photo – and everywhere blow only about it, honor it the genius. Or, even better, the child from school will return and behind performance of homeworks will read Alexander’s verses. Having looked at a strict portrait