I always thought cinema dates were just a bit of an excuse to sit in the dark and giggle at things. It seems Laurence actually really wants to see the movie.
9.20 PM: The film is over. We stand awkwardly at the doors of the cinema. So far the sum total of Laurence’s conversation is still, ‘Do you want a Minstrel?’
‘So, you enjoyed the film then?’ I ask.
He nods.
‘OK, well, bye, then…’
‘Oh, bye.’
I give him an awkward hug. And then he walks away. Seriously?! Is that… it?! Can that count as a date? Or even as an interaction? I say more to the cashier at Tesco when I’m buying some gum.
Evidence: Technology nerds are more charming over the internet.
posted by EditingEmma 22.28
I just got a message from Laurence: ‘Lol that film wasn’t as good as I thought it was gonna be. Disappointed. Did you enjoy it?x’
Evidence: And over their phones.
What? Just… what?! I can’t even be bothered to reply. That whole evening was such a flop. Why does anyone bother stepping outside the front door? The odds that you’ll have a better time doing anything on the outside than you will sitting watching TV seem pretty slim to me.
posted by EditingEmma 23.09
Until now I’d somehow successfully blocked that it was the night-before-the-first-day-of-sixth-form from my mind. It must have been all that scintillating conversation. Just think, before all this I was actually looking forward to starting sixth form. PAH.
Emma Nash @Em_Nasher Whyyyyyyyyyyyy
posted by EditingEmma 23.50
Imagining What Will Happen When Leon Sees Me Tomorrow
I’m listening to very intense music to set the scene. I walk into school, in my new black skater skirt and fitted shirt (that I bought from & Other Stories), finally liberated from the lumpy school jumper I’ve been stuck wearing for five years. My stye is barely noticeable. Our eyes catch… We keep making eye contact and he can’t pretend to focus on the conversation he’s having any longer. He strides over to me and puts his hand behind my neck and his other hand on my face and just kisses me…
And everyone is watching.
posted by EditingEmma 08.22
What Actually Happened When Leon Saw Me
Our eyes catch… He looks slightly awkward for a moment, but then keeps going with the conversation he’s having. Neither of us go over to say hello. Or really acknowledge each other at all.
posted by EditingEmma 08.33
Sitting next to Steph in registration, comparing timetables. Gracie is going on and on about ‘split ends’ and keeps shoving strands of red hair in my face. It feels strange to be interacting with so many people at once. I feel like a rabbit caught in headlights, and everything feels very loud and terrifying. But it’s nice… I think. I can’t believe I’m saying this but it almost makes me feel relieved to be back at school.
Discussed the Leon meeting with Steph:
‘I was so sure that the first time he saw me, in person, he wouldn’t be able to ignore me. But nope. He did. Are we absolutely, positively, one hundred per cent certain that I didn’t make the whole thing up?’
‘No. He definitely exists. I’ve seen him many times.’
‘I mean… the asking out thing. Maybe he never asked me out at all. Maybe he said, “Emma, will you HANG out with me?” And then my longing desire caused me to hear whatever I wanted to hear, and I took it to mean GO out with me, and then he was too awkward to say anything.’
‘I don’t think so.’
‘Sometimes my granddad does it. Sometimes because he loves trifle, he’ll say that my mum said we were having trifle, which she would never say in a million years, because she hates trifle. But he genuinely thinks it. He genuinely thinks she said we were having trifle, then gets all upset when she brings out yoghurt and fruit. What if that’s me?? What if I’ve inherited it??’
‘I think your granddad is eighty-nine, so you’re probably not there yet. And I don’t think he asked you to hang out because you were already hanging out. That makes no sense.’
‘What if he said… “Emma, will you eat sprouts with me?” Or “Will you joust with me?”’
‘Not impossible, but highly improbable.’
Emma Nash @Em_Nasher
Glad to be back at school for 5 seconds. Now chanting our stupid school motto in Latin. I take it all back. Hoc sugit.
posted by EditingEmma 11.22
The End of a Very Eventful Break
Coming to you nearly live from the Maths & Sciences Block girls’ toilets.
11.00 AM: I am standing around with Steph, Faith and Gracie in the tuck shop, sweating profusely because Leon is in the room. Gracie is WAY too excited about her brother’s party on Saturday.
‘Andy says he’s got loads of good drinking games for us to play,’ she says smugly.
‘You know it won’t be Drinking Articulate, don’t you?’ I point out.
‘Yes, of course,’ she snaps, then adds, ‘Though I don’t see why that would be such a bad idea.’
‘You could teach everyone all about how to raise their WPM,’ I say. (Words per minute.)
She beams and my sarcasm goes straight over her head.
11.05 AM: Laurence Myer ENTERS THE TUCK SHOP. Moving away from the safe, secluded environment of the Tech Lab, he wanders in looking a bit dazed, head spinning, blinking at the crowds… My heart sinks. I know I’m going to have to admit what I did last night.
Steph sees and stares at him for a second. Then she says, ‘I know what you did last night.’
Faith and Gracie look up from their hot dogs.
‘… What did you do last night?’ asks Faith.
‘I… I…’
‘She went on a date with Laurence Myer.’
‘Thanks, Steph.’
‘That’s… interesting,’ says Faith. ‘I didn’t know you spoke to Laurence Myer.’
‘I didn’t. I mean… I still haven’t.’
11.10 AM: He keeps looking over at us. And he’s all on his own, looking lost. And just as I think I’d better shuffle over for a bit of painfully awkward silence… Leon beats me to it.
Leon. With his dark, wavy hair and eyes like chocolate buttons.
The four of us stare in amazement.
‘This is brilliant,’ says Steph, opening up her crisps and settling in for the show.
‘Stop staring!’ I order, but then give up and stare.
Laurence looks inordinately grateful to have someone to talk to. Leon is just