After shutting the barn door, Nash went back into the house. A pang of regret hit him every time he entered. Before moving back, the last time he’d been inside had been the day he’d bought it as a surprise for Amy. An engagement present. He’d been planning on proposing to her the next week. Then his mother, once again, had destroyed his life.
The diamond ring still sat in its box in his top drawer. He really should sell it.
Like he ever would.
He checked on Ruby, asleep and curled up in a tight ball like a dog afraid of getting kicked. He kissed her soft cheek before going to the kitchen. The company he’d hired to paint and decorate the house had done a good job. He’d given them free rein and a blank check. Just told them to make it feel like a family lived there and to make sure Ruby’s room was fit for a princess. If only money could fix all of his problems, but the millions in the bank couldn’t win Ruby’s trust or buy Amy’s forgiveness.
Amy was going to say no to helping Ruby. And while her refusal would be best for him, it definitely was not best for Ruby.
The girl hid apples and packages of crackers under her pillow and in her closet. He’d found cookies in her shoe. The therapist had warned him it might take a while for her to believe she’d always have enough to eat. Whenever he found food, he was supposed to gently remind her she was safe with him and he would always provide for her.
He sat on one of the bar stools at the island, dropping his forehead into his hands. The enormity of the situation threatened to overcome him.
I’m not qualified for this. What if she always hoards food and wakes up screaming? What if she never smiles? Is too scared to go to school? What if she’s been damaged beyond repair?
He raised his head toward the ceiling.
God, I need You.
Ruby had no one but him.
He’d handle it. He had to.
* * *
Amy girded her shoulders and entered the church at 6:55 pm. She’d spent the past twenty-four hours talking to her mom, her best friend, Lexi Romine, and the Lord. Lexi and Mom thought she should decline being Ruby’s mentor. The Lord, it seemed, had other plans.
Every time she prayed, she kept coming back to Isaiah 6:8: “Also I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, Whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then said I, Here am I; send me.” She’d prayed for so long to help a child. How many times had she thought Here am I, Lord. Send me?
And now that the opportunity was here, she couldn’t justify turning it down. Every time she tried, her argument fell flat. She kept thinking of the Old Testament story about Joseph. If Joseph could forgive his brothers for selling him into slavery and then provide for them so their families didn’t starve, couldn’t she move past her issues with Nash to help Ruby?
Maybe this was her cross to bear.
But could she bear it?
With her back straight and head high, she strode to the preschool room. This wasn’t for Nash. It was for Ruby.
Maybe Nash didn’t keep his promises, but she kept hers. She’d promised the Lord she would do His will.
She believed this was His will.
After entering the room, she halted at the sight of Ruby on Nash’s lap. The child held a stuffed sheep in the air and was pretending to make it dance. She wasn’t smiling, but the fact she was playing was a good sign.
“Hello, Ruby.” She waved. “Who is this sheep? He’s quite the dancer.”
She immediately clutched the animal to her tummy like a wild rabbit stilling at the first hint of danger.
Nash took the sheep out of Ruby’s hand. “I think this is Sheldon. Sheldon the sheep. Is that right, RuRu?”
She turned to see his face. A hint of a smile lifted her lips, and she nodded.
“Or it could be Samantha.” Amy slowly approached them, trying to be as non-threatening as possible. “Are you sure it’s a boy?”
He flipped the sheep over twice then sniffed its head. “It smells like a boy. It’s not all flowery like a girl.” He held it up for Ruby to smell. She took a sniff. “What do you think?”
“Boy,” she said.
“Well, it is very nice to meet you, Sheldon.” Amy held her hand out and pretended to shake the animal’s paw. “Would he like to sit on your lap while we read a book?”
Ruby didn’t respond.
“Should we try another Curious George? See what trouble that silly monkey gets into today?”
Amy selected a book and folded her long legs to sit in the beanbag, grunting as she sank the final inches. Ruby brought the stuffed animal over. She didn’t sit, though.
“Stay?” Ruby asked Nash, her gaze full of worry.
“I’d hate to miss the story.” He folded his legs to sit cross-legged on the carpet. The process looked painful. Ruby, clutching Sheldon, settled on his lap, and he tickled her side.
“Daddy!” She giggled and squirmed. Nash stopped teasing her, kissing the top of her head instead.
Daddy? Amy ignored the pitter-patter of her heart at the sight of Nash in such a paternal role. Maybe if she and Ruby met privately, the arrangement would work. They could make cookies and color. They could go to the library and check out books or stop into The Beanery for hot chocolates.
If she was going to be part of Ruby’s life, it had to be on her terms. And that meant spending time alone with Ruby. No Nash allowed.
After reading two books, she asked Ruby if she wanted to pretend to bake a cake. Ruby followed her to the play kitchen, and Nash declared he’d be back in a few minutes. He had to speak to the pastor. As soon as Nash left, Ruby became expressionless, the way she’d been in the hallway yesterday.
“First we need flour and sugar.” Amy pointed to the fake boxes of food. “Can you find them?”
She stood with her arms glued to her sides. Okay. Amy grabbed a box and pretended to pour it into a plastic bowl. “Mmm... I love cake batter. Here’s some butter. Throw it in.” She handed plastic butter to Ruby, who let it fall into the bowl.
“And eggs. My cakes always have eggs. Let’s crack them.” Amy tapped the plastic egg against the table and pretended to drop it in. Ruby ignored the egg in front of her. “We’re ready to mix.” She found the plastic hand-mixer and gave it to the girl. “Give it a good stir.”
She obeyed, but Amy got the impression she was merely going through the motions, that she wasn’t enjoying herself.
Hannah and Daniel entered. “Hello, you two. Ruby, would you mind staying here with Daniel and me while Amy talks to your dad for a minute?”
Ruby just stared at her.
“I won’t be long.” Amy found Sheldon and gave him to Ruby. “Here. Make sure this sheep doesn’t get into any trouble.” Although she hated leaving her, she went to the meeting room.
“Well, I trust you’ve both had time to pray about the situation.” Pastor Moore waited for her to sit. Nash was in the same spot as yesterday. “What do you think?”
She considered for a moment. The previous twenty minutes solidified her opinion. With patience and a woman’s touch, Ruby had a better chance at coming out of her shell. And Amy wanted to be that woman.
“I would like to spend more time with Ruby.” Amy watched Nash. He jerked to attention. “But