Simply put, the biggest lesson as a Pioneer is to hire my weaknesses. Recently we put together a team of young leaders for mentoring purposes. I reached out to a few fellow officers to see who was interested. When we went through the 5 Voices, I was shocked to find all six had serious Pioneer, Creative, or Connector tendencies. We were missing our Guardians and Nurturers. Why? I unconsciously sought out leaders who thought like me – a huge mistake. Our conversations are a bit flat, we find we agree more than we disagree, and we see most every problem from the same vantage point.
It seems I am drawn toward those who share a strong vision for the future, but without our weaknesses represented on the team, we face certain failure. I now understand that all 5 Voices are inside of me, and I have spent a good deal of time working on my Nurturer voice – even when it feels awkward. I honestly care greatly for the people I work with, and that voice feels so hard to access at times, but practice is paramount. I have found those who are closest to me and know me best are kind, patient, and understanding when I work on my secondary voices. That is the strength of the 5 Voices and why everyone needs to understand them.
Batman needs Aquaman on the team!
Why We Need the 5 Voices Vocabulary
For the past few years we have been teaching the 5 Voices, we have had the privilege to work with leaders in many sectors and contexts. Almost all had taken multiple personality tests before, but few could remember their results, so their “personalities” were even more confused than before because they didn't know what to do with the information they received in a one-time event. The 5 Voices have proved simple enough that everyone remembers them and can actually begin to use them from the moment they first hear about them.
And not only is this simple language of 5 Voices memorable and easy to share, it also makes transformation possible. Here is how one leader has implemented all of the 5 Voices into his organization, as an example. You'll read about many more throughout this book as well:
I have seen major impact in my life, my family, and also at work. After learning about the foundational voices and how to access nonnatural voices, I understand more about how it feels to be on the other side of me (a Pioneer).
Our whole company now speaks the 5 Voices language. This is really amazing, and I see a big transformation in our teams by using a new language and mind-set for promoting innovative leadership tools. The main change I saw in all the teams in our organization is how long-term relationships evolved in such a positive direction.
Finally, we will introduce you to a concept called the 100X Teams. This is for those serious about getting teams on the right page, becoming healthy, and then learning how to multiply that health throughout the organization or family.
Our goal here is clear. We want to help you:
1. Discover your foundational voice and learn how to master it.
2. Understand why certain voices speak and act in a certain way and give you tools to not only handle them, but help them thrive.
3. Shape your culture, communicate with clarity, and build a team that is aligned, healthy, and excels.
4. Change your personal world, from the way you communicate with your family to the way you relate to those you spend most of the day with.
The 5 Voices as a concept is simple yet profound. It is designed to help you multiply healthy leadership practices and principles throughout the whole team or organization. If you practice it, your communication will go to another level with everyone you lead, both at work and at home.
We hope you enjoy unpacking the truths and insights contained within this book. It has changed our lives, it has affected the lives of all those we have worked with around the globe, and we believe it can impact yours, too. Let's get started.
SECTION 1
THE VOICES OF A TEAM
1
THE VOICE CALLED YOURS
For 29 years Sarah Churman could not hear. She is a wife and a mother, a friend and a daughter, and she was deaf. With an 85 bilateral decibel loss, she couldn't hear her daughter laugh or cry, the birds chirp, the door open, or her husband speak. Even more, she had never known what her own voice sounded like. Can you imagine what that must be like?
Some of our readers know this reality firsthand. According to the Hough Ear Institute, there are approximately 300 million people who suffer from a range of hearing impairment, from severe hearing loss to complete deafness. Millions of people like Sarah are not able to hear their own voice without the help of hearing aids or medicine.
Fortunately, Sarah Churman eventually received help, and with the benefit of technology, was able to experience the miracle of hearing her voice for the very first time in 2011. It is amazing to see her reaction. (Watch for yourself on YouTube/Sarah Churman and experience the emotions of hearing your voice after 29 years of silence.)
What we are attempting to help you do in this book is, in some ways, similar to what the professionals who helped Sarah did: We want to help you hear and understand your leadership voice, maybe for the first time. We want to help you discover the power of your voice, understand what it brings at its best, and what others really hear when you speak.
Your voice is a personal trademark. It is unique because no one has experienced life the way you have. We want to help you own your voice and communicate it with a renewed sense of confidence and self-awareness.
Hearing Your Voice for the First Time
For almost 20 years, Scott from Minnesota struggled with the gnawing feeling inside that he had nothing significant to contribute. To know Scott is to know that he is always full of ideas – ideas that could make everyone better. And yet, no one seemed to hear him or understand how his ideas could make work better for the people on his team.
Evening conversations with his wife Michelle consisted of replaying the day and hashing out the challenges he was facing, hoping to find a solution to one of his biggest questions: “How do I always find myself in the middle of two opposing opinions?” Scott was known as a kind and caring leader who could relate to others. He would share ideas with some of the leadership about how to make his teams work better, but most of the time no one would implement what seemed to him an obvious solution. He was talking, but his opinions and ideas were not being heard.
To anyone looking at Scott's life from the outside, he was the picture of a very successful salesman, rising to the top of each organization he worked for. But on the inside, something was missing. It never occurred to Scott that he had not trained his voice to be heard, and, on a deeper level, he didn't fully understand his own voice. Even more, Scott didn't understand the other voices on his team and was frustrated with his inability to bridge the gap in communication. This frustration would eventually turn to cynicism and then despair, as he began to question his own value to the team. Ultimately, the stress began to physically impact his health.
Does that sound like any of you? Anyone else feel like they are:
• Never having their ideas understood?
• Always fighting for or with people who are against the system?
• Looking at the future, while everyone else is stuck in the past?
Scott did not understand the type of leadership voice he had and what he, as a foundational voice Nurturer, could do to truly bring value to his team and family. (Note: as you will discover as you read further, we all have a foundational leadership voice that drives our actions and interactions with others. Nurturer is one of the 5 Voices.) Listen to how Scott describes finding his voice:
After hearing the 5 Voices for the first time, I realized that I had a [leadership] voice. For many years my voice had been silent. This affected my purpose, my marriage, my team, and my organization. As I became more self-aware, I began to find my voice again. It was a hard process of going through many walls of self-preservation. I had to revive it so it could be heard again. It has been a refining process for me. Little by little, I am becoming more and more alive