Я ждала его письма… Постоянно заходила в Интернет, чтобы проверить, не посмотрел ли он мой последний пост ему…
Да, да, да… именно – сначала совершенно неосознанно, а затем целенаправленно – я стала усиленно делать посты, выкладывая многозначительные фотки, подписывая их кратко, но с потаённым смыслом…
Мои руки дрожали, я зажмуривалась и, видя его имя в списке просмотров – он не поставил мне даже лайка! – я подпрыгивала, я визжала: «Ты не забыл меня! Ты хочешь меня! Ну, скажи, что ты тоже хочешь меня!!!»
В тот день я сделала пост с фотографией двух волн, бегущих навстречу друг другу и подписала:
«Встретимся?!»
И… он прокомментировал фотку, ответив мне в личку:
«Дa».
От этих двух букв я закричала на всю Вселенную! За-кри-ча-ла ему: «Я ТОЖЕ тебя хочу!», но, подумав немного, успокоилась и написала:
«Я тоже хочу…»
«Что хочешь?»
«тебя… увидеть…»
Это было безумием! Я всё понимала, но взывать к разуму в такие моменты совершенно бесполезно! Он, конечно же, не был Греем, – я чувствовала себя главной героиней фильма «Титаник»…
А разве Вам никогда не нравились плохие мальчики/девочки?! И разве Вы думали в тот момент, что Ваш «Титаник» уже заведомо обречён?! И я была согласна утонуть… когда-нибудь потом… но тогда…
0.1.The Girl and the Sea
Аmmouliani island14, Greece
«She used to sit for a long time by the Sea at sunset, the Girl in a pink dress. Lost in thoughts about something, she was gazing into the Sky. There was a Mysterious Land in the clouds, where winged people lived. Lilac castles beckoned her to them, in their quaint gardens fabulous flowers were fragrant and magical birds were singing. The wind carried unusual aromas and echoes of enchanting melodies to the Girl. And she also saw familiar faces there, they smiled and called the Girl to their Heavenly Country, to the City of the Sun. She dreamed of getting to them, but did not know how to do it, because she had no wings.
The Sun was setting into the Sea. Warm waves caressed her legs, singing a quiet kind song that she had heard from her mother when she was still a baby. The Girl looked around, but there was no one on the shore, and she felt completely lonely. The gloomy Rocks did not understand her, because they couldn’t feel anything, however, that was the reason they would never die. The Rocks, as usual, were only watching silently the picture at sunset: the Girl and the Sea.
The Sun was approaching the horizon. The waves were whispering louder and louder. The Magic Country floated away, losing its outlines. The Girl was standing by the Sea, and her tears fell onto the waves, and the Sea became salty…
The seagulls that flew to the seashore in the evening did not find anyone there. The Sun sank behind the horizon, and the Night came. Somewhere far away in the Sky, the seagulls noticed the outlines of an unknown City. They wondered, what kind of City it was, being situated not on Earth, but in the Sky. They had never seen such cities before! And the two most curious seagulls decided to make a flight to the mysterious City, but they had not enough strength to reach it.
And the Girl disappeared. The Rocks no longer saw her there, on the seashore, at sunset. Only the book left by the Girl on the coastal stone reminded them of her existence…»
«Hmmm…» I closed the book and put it aside. The miniature was written by me at the age of twelve, but sometimes I was drawn to read it again.
Every time after returning to reality it seemed to me that I remained the little Assol15, who still didn’t lose hope for…
I was waiting for his letter… I constantly visited my Internet page to check if he had looked at my last post to him…
Yes, yes, yes… At first completely unconsciously and then purposefully, I began to post more and more expressive pictures, signing them briefly, but with a hidden meaning…
My hands were trembling, I was closing my eyes at seeing his name in the list of viewers – oh, he hadn’t given me even a like! – but I was jumping, I squealed, «You have not forgotten me! You want me! Well, tell me you want me, too!!!»
That day I made a post with a photo of two waves running towards each other, and I signed it, «Meet?!» And…
He commented the photo, answering me in a private chat, «Yes».
These three letters made me scream at the whole Universe! Yes, I screamed, «I want you, too!», but after thinking a little, I wrote,
«I want that, too.»
«What do you want?»
«…to see you…»
It was madness! I understood everything, but appealing to reason at such moments was completely useless! Of course, he was not the captain of the ship «Scarlet Sails», and I mostly