Anthony Wood affirms that “at Disse and in the diocese” Skelton “was esteemed more fit for the stage than the pew or pulpit.”[75] It is at least certain that anecdotes of the irregularity of his life, of his buffoonery as a preacher, &c. &c. were current long after his decease, and gave rise to that tissue of extravagant figments which was put together for the amusement of the vulgar, and entitled the Merie Tales of Skelton.[76]
Churchyard informs us that Skelton’s “talke was as he wraet [wrote];”[77] and in this propensity to satire, as well in conversation as in writing, originated perhaps those quarrels with Garnesche, Barclay, Gaguin, and Lily, which I have now to notice.
As the four poems Against Garnesche were composed “by the kynges most noble commaundement,” we may conclude that the monarch found amusement in the angry rhymes with which Skelton overwhelmed his opponent. Garnesche, it appears, was the challenger in this contest;[78] and it is to be regretted that his verses have perished, because in all probability they would have thrown some light on the private history of Skelton. The Flyting of Dunbar and Kennedy[79] bears a considerable resemblance to the verses against Garnesche; but the two Scottish poets are supposed to have carried on a sportive warfare of rude raillery, while a real animosity seems to have existed between our author and his adversary.[80] At the time of this quarrel (the exact date of which cannot be determined) Christopher Garnesche was gentleman-usher to Henry the Eighth, and dignified with knighthood;[81] and (if Skelton may be credited) had risen from the performance of very menial offices to the station which he then occupied. As he had no claims on the remembrance of posterity, little is known concerning him; but since we have evidence that his services were called for on more than one occasion of importance, he must have been a person of considerable note. He is twice incidentally mentioned in connexion with the royal sisters of Henry the Eighth. In 1514, when the Princess Mary embarked for France, in order to join her decrepit bridegroom Louis the Twelfth, Garnesche formed one of the numerous retinue selected to attend her, and had an opportunity of particularly distinguishing himself during that perilous voyage: “The ii. daye of October at the hower of foure of the clocke in the morenynge thys fayre ladye tooke her ship with all her noble compaignie: and when they had sayled a quarter of the see, the wynde rose and seuered some of the shyppes to Caleys, and some in Flaunders, and her shippe with greate difficultie was brought to Bulleyn, and with great ieopardy at the entryng of the hauen, for the master ran the ship hard on shore, but the botes were redy and receyued this noble lady, and at the landyng Sir Christopher Garnyshe stode in the water, and toke her in his armes, and so caryed her to land, where the Duke of Vandosme and a Cardynall with many estates receyued her and her ladyes,”[82] &c. Again, in a letter, dated Harbottle 18th Oct. 1515, from Lord Dacre of Gillesland and T. Magnus to Henry the Eighth, concerning the confinement in childbed of Margaret widow of James the Fourth, &c. we find; “Sir Christofer Garneis came to Morpeth immediatly vpon the queneis delyueraunce, and by our aduice hath contynued there with suche stuff as your grace hath sent to the said quene your suster till Sondaye laste paste, whiche daye he delyuered your letter and disclosed your credence, gretely to the quenes comforte. And for somiche as the quene lieth as yet in childe bedde, and shall kepe her chambre these thre wookes at the leiste, we haue aduised the said sir Christofer Garneis to remaigne at Morpeth till the queneis comyng thidder, and then her grace may order and prepare euery parte of the said stuf after her pleasure and as her grace semeth moste conuenient,” &c.[83] A few particulars concerning Garnesche may be gleaned from the Books in the Public Record Office:
| (Easter Term, 18 Hen. vii.) “Cristofero Garneys de regardo de denariis per Johannem Crawford et al. per manuc. for.[84] | xl. li.” |
(i.e. in reward out of moneys forfeited by John Crawford and another upon bail-bond.)
| (1st Henry viii.) “Item to Christofer Garnisshe for the kinges offring at S. Edwardes shiryne the next day after the Coronacion[85] | vj. s. viij. d.” |
| (Easter Term, 1–2 Henry viii.) “Cristofero Garneys vni generosorum hostiariorum regis [one of the king’s gentlemen-ushers] de annuitate sua durante regis beneplacito per annum | x. li. |
| Eidem Cristofero de feodo suo ad xx. li. per annum pro termino vite sue[86] | xx. li.” |
and we find that afterwards by letters patent dated 21st May, 7th Henry viii., in consideration of his services the king granted him an annuity of thirty pounds for life, payable half-yearly at the Exchequer.[87]
| (11th Henry viii.) “Item to Sir Christofer Garnisshe knight opon a warraunt for the hyre of his howse at Grenewyche[88] at x. li. by the yere for one half a yere due at Ester last and so after half yerely during x yeres[89] | c. s.” |
| (20th Henry viii.) “Cristofero Garnyshe militi de annuitate sua ad xxx l. per annum per breve currens Rec. den. pro festo Michīs ult. pret. viz. pro vno anno integro per manus Ricardi Alen[90] | xxx. li.” |
see above: this entry is several times repeated, and occurs for the last time in 26th Henry viii.[91]
Bale mentions among the writings of Alexander Barclay a piece “against Skelton.”[92] It has not come down to us; but the extant works of Barclay bear testimony to the hearty dislike with which he regarded our author. At the conclusion of The Ship of Fooles is this contemptuous notice of one of Skelton’s most celebrated poems;
“Holde me excused, for why my will is good,
Men to induce vnto vertue and goodnes;
I write no ieste ne tale of Robin Hood,
Nor sowe no sparkles ne sede of viciousnes;
Wise men loue vertue, wilde people wantonnes;
It longeth not to my science nor cunning,
For Philip the Sparow the Dirige to singe:”[93]
a sneer to which Skelton most probably alludes, when, enumerating his own productions in the Garlande of Laurell, he mentions,
“Of Phillip Sparow the lamentable fate,