There was too much going on in his mind for him to decipher the newfound emotions, but he didn’t have time to figure them out. He wanted to get to Alexa and get this night over with.
As he pulled up to his house, he knew he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t going to try to seduce her. He meant it when he said he wanted her still. Relationships weren’t for him, but Alexa was the one bright spot in his life right now and he was damn well going to hold on to her...which meant he better wrap his mind around the fact he’d have to man up for Mason.
Hayes wasn’t about to enter a child’s life and not be anything less than stable.
* * *
Maybe she should’ve kept the classic black dress.
Alexa turned side to side in front of her floor-length mirror. The red dress draped over her shoulders and hugged her every curve...maybe a little too well. Something about the trumpet-style skirt and fitted bodice had made her feel sexy when she’d been trying on the host of dresses Hayes had sent.
But now that it was go time, she wondered if she should’ve ignored the sexy and kept the black with a modest scoop neck.
What did one wear to a governor’s mansion?
Alexa smoothed a hand down her abdomen, hoping to rid herself of some of those nerves. Sadie had offered to take Mason for the night. All Alexa had to say was that she had a date and Sadie jumped at the opportunity to quiz Alexa. She didn’t give in. What she and Hayes shared was... Honestly, she wasn’t even sure, so how was she supposed to tell anyone else?
Just as she fastened the bracelet around her wrist, her doorbell rang. In that instant, her heart sped up and the chaos of jumbled nerves returned.
She headed toward the door figuring if she was nervous, she couldn’t imagine what Hayes was feeling. The man didn’t want to leave his ranch, let alone go to some fancy ceremony where he was going to be awarded for something he felt guilty about.
Alexa wasn’t sure what had happened overseas, but those events had changed Hayes forever.
Pulling in a shaky breath, she opened her door...and was greeted with the sexiest man she’d ever seen. He’d forgone the cowboy hat and boots, the well-worn jeans and T-shirt. He stood before her wearing his uniform. The black single-breasted jacket stretched across his broad shoulders. Various pins and patches adorned the shoulders and chest. The offset beret seemed to draw even more attention to those black eyes.
The man flawlessly slid from hardworking rancher to hero in uniform.
Alexa shivered at the way he raked his eyes over her. Slowly, inch by inch, as if assessing what she wore beneath. Arousal curled through her, as she knew it would. She hadn’t seen him in days and just being near him put her body on high alert. She hadn’t mentally prepared herself for the uniform, though.
“We’re ditching the ceremony,” he growled as he stepped over the threshold. He slid his arms around her waist and aligned his body with hers. “Damn, Alexa.”
She held on to his biceps to keep her balance. “We can’t ditch. I’m pretty sure there’s some unwritten law about snubbing the governor, especially considering you’re the guest of honor.”
“You smell so damn good,” he murmured against her ear.
Alexa shivered against him and was having a difficult time recalling why they couldn’t just stay here.
Oh, yeah. The award and the fact she’d promised herself not to get more deeply involved. Because if she took things further, then she’d have to tell him who her husband was. And because she was still unsure about bringing a man into Mason’s life. She didn’t want to confuse her son. She made continual efforts to make sure his life was secure.
“We’re going to be late if we don’t go.”
Hayes eased back. “You’re the perfect reason to be late and they’d all understand once they saw you in this dress.”
Apparently she’d kept the right one.
“Thanks for this,” she told him, stepping back and removing herself from his arms. She couldn’t think when he touched her. “I would’ve gotten my own dress, though.”
“I wanted to buy this for you.”
“And the jewelry and shoes?” she questioned. “I thought I was just borrowing these things.”
“They’re yours,” he replied, tugging at the cuffs of his jacket. “You could’ve kept everything I sent.”
Alexa laughed. “There were nearly thirty dresses to choose from.”
He stared back as if he didn’t see the problem. First of all, what would a single mom and preschool teacher do with that many formal dresses? Second, she couldn’t even imagine the cost. This dress alone was probably one paycheck. She’d seen the label and that wasn’t even adding in the cost of her accessories.
Yeah, definitely nothing she could wear to the playground with Mason.
“Thanks for not backing out,” he told her, all joking and flirting set aside.
“I wouldn’t do that to you.”
Hayes nodded and held her attention with those serious black eyes. “I know you wouldn’t. You should have, but you didn’t. Let’s just put all our issues aside and enjoy our night together.”
She opened her mouth, but he held up a hand. “I know it’s selfish,” he went on. “If you want to talk, I’ll listen, but after the ceremony.”
Alexa stepped forward and framed his clean-shaven face. “I know this is difficult for you, but you are deserving.”
He started to turn his face away, but she pulled him back. “You are.”
A corner of his mouth kicked up. “Are you wearing underwear?”
Alexa smacked his chest, getting a palm-full of medals. “We better go.”
“It would help distract me from the award I don’t want if you just tell me what you’re wearing underneath.” He snaked a hand out and ran it over her backside. Letting out a groan, he muttered, “A thong. You’re killing me.”
Alexa shifted away from him, knowing full well if they didn’t get out that door, they’d be in her bedroom...if they even made it that far.
“Now that you have something else to concentrate on, let’s go.” She grabbed her clutch and placed her keys and phone inside before closing the gold clasp. “I hope they have chocolate cake at this dinner.”
Hayes held the door open for her and swatted her on the butt. “Dessert isn’t happening at the ceremony.”
Shivers raced through her as she came to the realization that they would end up back here. And the realization that he was going to keep coming around and she was going to let him.
She was going to have to tell him the truth about Scott and then he’d have to trust that she never purposely betrayed him.
But not tonight.
Tonight was about him getting a prestigious award whether he wanted to accept it or not. Tomorrow, she would tell him everything.
Tomorrow, she would explain how she’d fallen for him and see if this could be more than just a friendship with intimacy.
For the first time in two years, Alexa was ready to move on and cling to the happiness she’d discovered. If only her lie by omission didn’t stand in the way... If only Hayes wanted a family, because she and Mason were a team.