They walked out to their cars and there was a strange moment because had she not been doing her level best to get pregnant, had they just been out, Ethan would have done his usual thing and kissed her. Right now that would prove no problem at all, because as they stood by her car, he actually forgot about needles and ultrasounds and little people that made an awful lot of noise and demanded to be fed a lot.
‘‘Night, then,’ she said, going into her bag for her keys and then looking up at him.
‘‘Night, Penny.’
He went to give her a kiss on the cheek, but changed his mind midway. Except it was too late for that so he went ahead, but there was an awkward moment because he missed his mark and his lips landed a little close to her mouth.
He felt the warmth of her blush on his lips and knew he should say good night and walk away. Except he wasn’t holding a needle and she wasn’t crying or asking him to stop and he could smell her hair and that musky perfume. He thought of the purple underwear he had glimpsed earlier.
It was all just a second, a very long second, and Penny was a guilty party in this too. Had been complicit as she’d carefully selected her underwear that morning, was as attracted as he was and, yes, she wanted his mouth. Now here it was, just the graze of his lips, and she felt as if a feather was stroking her from the inside. There was just a flare that lit between them and mouths that were a beat away from applying pressure, but neither did. Just two mouths mingling and deciding to linger, two minds racing and about to quiet and give in, but then they were literally saved by the bell, or rather by his pager.
‘Did you arrange that one too?’ Penny asked.
Ethan just grinned, because had he been thinking straight he might have arranged one for a few moments ago because he did not want to start anything with Penny.
Well, not Penny.
He didn’t want to start anything with a soon-to-be-pregnant Penny, Ethan reminded himself as he telephoned work to find out what was happening.
‘The place is steaming,’ Ethan said when he came off the phone.
‘Should I come in?’
‘It’s packed and they’re not getting through them. I’ll just go in for a couple of hours and help them clear the backlog. You go home.’
‘You’re sure?’
Ethan nodded, gave her a light kiss on the cheek that was definitely just a friendly one, a token effort to erase the one that had happened before, saw her into her car and then headed to his.
One more needle to get through, Ethan told himself.
He was almost as nervous about it as she was.
PENNY KNEW THE drill only too well.
After a very sleepless night, trying to prepare for her case presentation then later going over and over their near kiss, Penny was up at the crack of dawn and about to have her ultrasound. She went to hitch up her skirt, but she was wearing her wraparound dress and it was a bit too tight.
‘Just open it up, Penny,’ the sonographer said, and offered her a sheet, which she pulled over not just her stomach but her chest, because everything was exposed.
Damn.
She had been dressing for her presentation.
Or had she?
Penny honestly wasn’t sure.
It was her presentation outfit, which had been sitting in its dry-cleaner bag for two weeks now, waiting for today. It was her grey wraparound and even though she didn’t have a cleavage, it was a bit too low so underneath she wore a silver-grey cami with a bit of lace at the top, and because it was Penny she wore matching panties, which were rather more lace than silk.
And tonight she’d be getting her needle from Ethan. It was too much, Penny decided. She’d just change into scrubs, except there was a part of her that wanted his eyes on her, a part of her that refused to be silenced, that wanted more than last night, and Penny was most unused to such strong feelings. Even now, walking to get her blood done, she was thinking of the near miss last night and what might have unfolded if they hadn’t been interrupted by the pager. She blinked in astonishment at the depravity of her own thoughts.
‘Morning, Penny.’
It took two attempts to get the blood this morning. She was stressed about her case presentation, worried about her choice of clothes, exhausted after a night of thinking and trying not to think about Ethan and a kiss that never happened and must never happen! This meant Penny sobbed like she never had as they took her blood.
‘Finished.’ The nurse smiled as she pressed down on the cotton swab. ‘I think I left a bruise.’
‘It’s my own fault,’ Penny said, because despite being held down her arm had jerked when the needle had gone in. As Penny blew her nose, instead of standing up and getting out of there as quickly as possible as she usually would, she asked a question. She was a typical doctor and had read up on things herself, but there was one bit now that was honestly confusing her. ‘Can I ask a question?’
‘Of course.’
‘About …’ She was going bright red but tried to sound matter-of-fact as she spoke. ‘Increased libido?’ Her voice came out as a croak and Penny cleared her throat, but the nurse was completely unfazed by her question.
‘You’re a walking cocktail of hormones at the moment, Penny,’ the nurse said. ‘Often women could think of nothing worse at this stage, but for some …’
‘So it’s normal?’
‘Sure. Just make sure that you use protection,’ the nurse said. ‘It’s only once we’ve done the embryo transfer that you need to refrain, and not just from sex, no orgasms either—which is unfortunate …’ she smiled ‘… because an increase in libido is commonplace then.’
Penny blinked. She’d sort of skipped over all those parts, thinking that it would never really be a problem for her.
‘You’ll get a phone call later and we’ll sort out your doses,’ the nurse said. ‘You’ll be ready for your trigger injection any day soon. So just enjoy it for now.’
She certainly wouldn’t be enjoying it! Penny just wanted these feelings to pass, wanted a neat explanation as to why she was nearly climbing the walls at the thought of Ethan. Did she fancy him or was it the medication?
And did it really matter?
Would it be so terrible to have sex with someone you really fancied even if it was going absolutely nowhere?
Stop it, she told herself as she drove to work.
Just stop it right there!
Of course the second she walked into work she saw Ethan. She tried to douse the fire in her cheeks, only it wasn’t working—he was dressed in scrubs and very unshaven. He was scowling at the bed board and had clearly been up all night.
‘Good sleep?’ His voice was wry.
‘Fantastic.’ Hers was equally wry as she walked past, because she’d be lucky to have slept for more than a couple of hours, though she was glad now that she hadn’t accepted the consultant’s position. There was no way she could have juggled it all, she would not have coped if she’d been called in last night and had still been expected to work through the next day.
Penny got through the busy morning, doing her best to avoid