‘OK.’ She felt only relief that he was interrupting her thoughts. She wanted to stop thinking. Stop analysing. Stop remembering so much. Why did being with Chase make her remember? She’d spent two years trying not to think, and now the thoughts came fast and thick, unstoppable.
She needed Chase to stop them.
She lay on the bed and he knelt over her. Millie felt herself tense. ‘What are you—?’
‘Trust me.’
And she knew she did trust him. Amazingly. Implicitly. Yet that thought was scary too. Chase reached for something above her head, and she saw he’d taken the satin pillow-case from the pillow.
He took the pillow-case off the other pillow and Millie waited, arousal and uncertainty warring within her.
‘Care to tell me what’s going on?’ she asked as lightly as she could.
Chase slowly slid his hand from her shoulder to her palm, lacing her fingers with his own as he raised her hand above her head.
‘I’m tying you up.’
‘What?’ She thought he was joking. Of course he was joking. Then she realised he’d done it, and her hand was tied to the bed post with a satin pillow-case. She stared at him with wide eyes, totally shocked. Chase simply knelt there, smiling faintly, his eyes dark and serious. Waiting.
Waiting for her permission.
She drew in a deep, shuddering breath, her whole body intensely, unbearably aware. She had no room for thoughts. She said nothing.
He bent down and kissed her deeply on the mouth, another soul-stirring kiss that had her arching instinctively towards him.
And then he tied up her other hand. She lay there, her hands tied above her head, her body completely open to his caress.
Vulnerable.
This felt far more intense than anything that had happened so far between them, and she knew why Chase was doing it.
He was taking everything from her. Taking it all, so he could give.
All in.
Slowly Chase slid his hands across her tummy, over her breasts, reaching behind to unhook her bra. ‘Sorry,’ he whispered. ‘I do like it, but it had to go eventually.’
She still couldn’t speak. Especially not when he tossed the bra onto the floor and bent his head to her breasts, his tongue flicking lightly over her nipples. She arched again, her head thrown back, pleasure streaking through her like lightning—but still the thoughts.
My breasts are too small.
Rob never liked them.
I don’t deserve a man like this.
‘Still thinking, huh?’ He lifted his head and looked at her, his voice wry even as his eyes blazed.
‘Sorry,’ she whispered. She wanted him to help her forget, but maybe she couldn’t forget unless she first released the memories. Shared them.
The most terrifying thought of all.
‘Don’t be sorry.’
‘I want to stop thinking so much. Remembering.’
‘I know you do.’
‘Help me,’ she implored. ‘Help me, Chase.’
He gazed at her, his face suffused with both tenderness and desire. What a heady combination. She felt more for him in that moment then she ever had before, and then he took another pillow-case, folded it in half and placed it over her eyes. Millie gasped aloud. Chase waited, the pillow-case folded over her eyes but not tied.
She blinked, shocked and yet knowing she needed this. Chase was helping her, helping her in a way she’d never have expected. It was strange and scary, yet amazingly right.
‘OK?’ he asked softly and she nodded. He tied the blindfold around her eyes.
Millie lay there, trying to adjust to this new reality. Her world had shrunk to the feel, sound and scent of Chase. Her mind had no room save for the sense of him. Her body tensed in a kind of exquisite anticipation, waiting for his touch. Wondering where he would touch her, every nerve taut with glorious expectation as she lay there, helpless, hopeful and utterly in his control.
And then she felt his mouth between her thighs, right on the centre of her, and she let out a shudder of shocked pleasure. She had not expected that.
Her body writhed beneath him and she felt a pleasure so intense it was akin to pain as her body surged towards a climax. ‘Chase,’ she gasped, his name a sob. And then he stopped, taking her to the brink and no further, and she ached with the loss of him. ‘Chase,’ she said again, and this time it was a plea.
She could hear his breathing, ragged and uneven, and his knees pressed on the outside of her thighs. She felt his heat, knew he was right above her. Where would he touch her next?
She let out a long shudder, every sense sizzling with excitement.
And then he began to touch her, a blitz of caresses that had her so focused on the sensation she could not form so much as a single coherent thought. First a butterfly brush of a kiss on her wrist. A blizzard of kisses on her throat. Then he kissed her deeply on the mouth and she responded, straining against the bonds that had brought her to this moment. He kissed her everywhere, light, teasing kisses, deep-throated demands, bites, licks and nibbles. She cried beneath him, first out of pleasure and amazement and then something deeper.
Something inside her started to break.
She’d told him she wasn’t broken, and she hadn’t been. She’d been holding herself together, only just, her soul and heart a maze of hairline cracks and fissures. And now, under Chase, she shattered.
Pain and pleasure, joy and sorrow, erupted from the depths of her being in helpless cries that became wrenching sobs, her whole body shaking with the force of them even as she lay there, splayed open to him, everything exposed. Everything vulnerable.
‘Millie,’ he said, and his voice was full of love.
‘Yes,’ she choked. ‘Yes, Chase, now.’
Distantly she heard the rip of foil and knew Chase would finally be inside her. She’d never wanted anything so much, and yet she still gave a cry of surprise and joy when she felt him slide inside, fill her up.
She’d been so empty.
His arms came around her and Chase freed her so she enfolded her body around his, drawing him deeper inside as she buried her face in his neck and sobbed through her climax.
Chase surged inside her, deeper and deeper, and with his arms around her, holding her tightly and tenderly to him, he brought them both home.
CHASE felt his heart race as he held Millie in his arms and she sobbed as if her own heart were breaking.
God help him. God help them both. He’d never expected sex between them to be like that. Mind-blowing indeed. He was completely and utterly spent, emotionally, physically, everything.
Millie pressed her face against his neck, her body shaking with the force of her emotion. Chase didn’t speak, knew there were no words. He just stroked her back, her hair, wiped the tears from her cheeks with his thumbs.
Millie’s sobs began to subside into snuffles and hiccups, and she curled herself into him, as if she wanted to be as close to him as possible, her legs across his, her arm around his waist, her head still buried against his neck.
Chase held her, cradled her closer, even as part of him was distantly acknowledging that this had been one hell of a mistake.
She lifted her face