Like Josie, my experience has taught me that happiness is not an it; happiness is not a thing; happiness is not a destination; happiness is not just a state of mind, and happiness is not just in YOU; happiness is YOU! Happiness is your true nature, and it is what you experience when you allow people like Josie to show you how to listen to your wisdom and follow your joy.
As an added bonus in this book, Josie also introduces you to her friends (who are also angels, like Josie) and to teachers of happiness (like the Dalai Lama and Marci Shimoff). Their insights and tips are a perfect supplement to Josie's teachings. So, I encourage you to get to know Josie, the spirit booster, by turning the pages of this precious book ever so slowly so as to receive the many treasures and blessings therein.
Robert Holden, PhD
London, England
Author, Be Happy www.robertholden.org
Robert Holden and Josie Varga
Introduction
“Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.”
Abraham Lincoln
“WE HOLD THESE TRUTHS to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” Undoubtedly, this is the most cited line in the Declaration of Independence and one of the best known sentences in American history.
Most of us have grown accustomed to the belief that happiness is something which we need to pursue or strive to obtain. The truth is that the “pursuit of happiness” is quite the paradox. You don't have to go very far to find true happiness as it lies within you. Happiness is your actual state of being, true self, or true nature. Unhappiness, therefore, is ignorance of one's true nature; it is our ego self at work. So, until we realize who we truly are, we will never obtain the happiness that we seek.
Our Founding Fathers knew this. During their era, the word “pursue” meant not to chase after but to practice regularly. Jefferson and the other members of the Continental Congress believed happiness is what God intended for all of us because it is our natural state of being.
Consider what was going on at the time the Declaration of Independence was written: the British were closing in on the American colonies, and we were in the midst of war. Yet, despite everything that was taking place on the outside, happiness was clearly on Jefferson's mind. Happiness is not external but internal. Studies have shown that as Westerners have grown richer over the years, they are no happier. Why?
To answer this question, we need look no further than our children. They live in the moment, never worrying about the things that consume adults. They focus on one thing at a time and do not distress about future events.
Yes, children do get upset, but they don't hang on to that anger or negative emotion. They may be upset about not being able to play with their toys or whatever the case may be, but they are able to let the emotion go as soon as something else grabs their attention. They don't worry about what they are going to do next. The only thing that occupies their minds is being happy in the moment. It is their true nature and it is our true nature.
As we grow older, however, we bury this awareness within because our minds become cluttered with what I like to call “mind chatter.” We worry about the bills, the kids, work, etc. The list goes on and on. We are consumed with negative thoughts of fear and desire to the point where we can no longer experience the joy within us. Eventually, these thoughts become our reality.
If we can learn to silence this mind chatter, we can discover happiness once again. Notice here that I didn't say “find happiness.” Mystics have long told us that “happiness is inherent in our souls.” It is independent of what is going on around us and independent of emotions. This sounds like a contradiction. I mean how can happiness be independent of our emotions? But the truth is when we remove all the negative emotions within, we are left with nothing but happiness. These emotions include: stress, hatred, sadness, depression, envy, jealousy, guilt, doubt, worry, fear, and so many more.
We are not born unhappy; we choose to be unhappy. We are born with an inner peace absent of any negative thoughts. We knew only compassion, joy, and love. There was no judgment, only acceptance. And this acceptance is what allowed that inner peace to grow. As Gandhi once said, “Be the peace you wish to see in the world.”
True happiness is possible at all times, no matter what the circumstances in your life. It doesn't matter how much money you have or how many material things you own. The fact is research has shown that the wealthy are not necessarily happier than the poor. On the contrary, many people have become unhappy once they struck it rich. If you look for happiness, you will never be happy. Ironically, the more you chase after it, the further you are from it.
Material things don't make us happy. They bring us only pleasure. There is a difference. Pleasure is an enjoyment brought on by outside incentives. There are many things that can bring us pleasure like buying a new house, getting a college degree, meeting with friends, making love, etc. Pleasure requires something to happen in order for you to experience it. This is not the case with happiness. While pleasure is external, happiness is internal. Something that brings us pleasure will not necessarily make us happy.
You might be saying, “Well, that is easy for you to say; you've probably lived a trouble-free and comfortable life.” Nothing could be further from the truth. Allow me to tell you a little about myself.
My father and his four siblings grew up poor on a farm in Italy, escaping to the United States in search of the American Dream. Although my mother, who was born in Partinico, Sicily, did not grow up on a farm, bread and meat were a special treat in her house as they were provided only on special occasions. My parents married and had three children of which I was the youngest and was named after my maternal grandmother Josephine Oliveri.
My family was surprised by my premature arrival at 7½ months with reddish hair and big blue eyes, looking nothing like my dark-haired, brown-eyed brother and sister. But even more surprising was the realization that their little girl had a disability. I was born with cerebral palsy (CP), which is a non-progressive condition caused by brain damage characterized by muscular or motor impairment. CP is often accompanied by problems with sensation, perception, and speech.
No two cases of CP are exactly alike, and cases range from extremely severe to relatively mild. I am very fortunate as my case is very mild. However, I still spent time in a wheelchair, grew up wearing leg braces, and still suffer from a speech impediment as well as severe bilateral hearing loss.
As a little girl, I can remember watching the neighborhood kids playing in the street and wondering if I were ever going to be one of them. Would they ever accept me or would they continue to poke fun at me and the way I walked? Something told me that I was going to be subjected to their mockery for a long time, and I was. Through it all, the one thing that I craved more than anything else in the world was happiness. I craved it with a passion. But how could I be happy when I was not accepted by the outside world? How could I be happy when I struggled to get by with my level of hearing and fell down almost daily from the lack of balance in my legs?
My teenage years were especially difficult as kids continued to make fun of me and even physically abused me. Again, I was absolutely miserable. If it weren't for the support of my family and friends, I don't know what I would have done. But if you were to ask my parents how I was as a baby, they would tell you that I was the happiest thing on the face of this earth, always smiling, always content and happy. So what happened?
Somewhere