U-Ottila wenza ubunyama ebusweni bakhe kwaye, ethatha iphepha elicetywayo, wakhwela kwindlu yangasese. Kwakukho isandi esikhulu, iPent yajika yaya phandle, ivala loo nto. Kwaye u-Ottila uphumle, wajonga phakathi kwemilenze yakhe kwaye watyibilika ubuso bakhe. Ayisiyongxaki kuphela ukunuka kwamehlo amuncu, kodwa zonke iibhulukhwe ezivela ngaphandle zazikrwelwe ngumbala omncinci, omdaka ngombala, owomileyo unomsindo. Khange kubekho mbuzo wethoyilethi. Nditsho namaconsi eswekile eqhotsiweyo eludongeni.
I – Incephalopath yema kwikholamu kwaye, ibona isergeant eyayishiyile, ngokukhawuleza yafika kuye.
– Molo! Apchi, «wancuma.
– Yintoni, ulinde umzukulwana? I-penth yabuza sarcastically.
– Nguwuphi umzukulwana? Apchi, – Isidenge Arutun Karapetovich.
– Yintoni le undakhela yona? Okanye ngaba ngumphelelisi wakho? Ucwangcisa ntoni, basebenzi beendwendwe?
– Ngubani? Apchi, «uHarutun wothuka.
– Yintoni oyakha isidenge? Ubuhlobo bakho bufunekayo Unaye
– Ah? i-apchi, -ayirhuqa izidlele zayo nge-Incephalopath. – hayi. Andimazi kwaphela. Ixesha lokuqala ndibona.
– Kwaye umphekela ntoni ke? Stab, malume. -Kwaye kwaqubuka isikhonzi. UHarutun warhola umva. -Ukwenzele izinto zakho, kunye nezakho, kwaye wena?
– Aha, apchi, ndiyayazi, kodwa imbi kakhulu, kwaye kuphela kubulela kumfazi wakhe.
– Yintoni? – uPent wancuma.
– Ndilala nenkosikazi yakhe! -uqinisekisiwe uHarutun. Iserinant grinned kwaye yaya kudubula amaxwebhu ebhiya.
– Kwaye iya kukhutshwa nini? – ungene ngaphakathi kwigumbi lokuhlala.
– Njani indlu yangasese ekhaya kwaye impendulo iya kuza. Ke ngeentsuku ezintathu ndinelungelo lokumfuna.
– Ngaba ndingamnceda? -acebise uHarutun kuyo yonke indawo yokubhalela.
– Uhlambe indlu yangasese?
– Ewe, ukukhululwa ngokukhawuleza.
– Hayi, ayifanele.
Ngelishwa uHarutun wehlisile intloko yakhe: Mdaa… wafika apho akukho mali kwaye uKlop wehliswa.
– Ngaba unayo imali? – Umntu uhlebeze ngqo kwi-auricle ukuya kwinkampani. Wathuthuzela umzimba wakhe wonke waguquka. Emva kwakhe kwakumi i-elementi enamanqatha enxibe iyunifomu yamapolisa kwaye yayihlafunisisa i-burger.
– Nnnet.
– Kutheni? Om yum yum.
– Kwaye imali, i-apchi, -UHarutun wadideka kwiingcamango kwaye, wolula umnwe wakhe wesalathiso, ekhangela abafundi, wakhomba umnyango weposi. -Uye imali evela kweyam, i-apchi, chef, phaya, kwi-monkeyclip evela eKlop.
– Yintoni ibug? Ngaba esi sisidlaliso?
– Hayi, igama lakhe lokugqibela, u-apchi, wayebanjiwe de kwaziwa kwakhona.
– Ahhh! Om yum yum., Ke masihambe, niyokuthatha imali kuye, ngokungathi niyinika nina, nindinike.
– Ahhh. Unayo, i-apchi, ikhadi.
– Uxolo. -Uma polisa ethatha umhlala phantsi enzonzobileni yethambeka.
Kwiveki emva koko, uBedbug wakhululwa kwisikhululo samapolisa sama-78. Eli yayilisebe lesihlanu ngokulandelelana, liqala ngasesiteshini sesikhululo kunye naphi na apho ahlamba izindlu zangasese. Akukho mntu ngaphambi kwakhe wavuma kule nto. Kwaye kwafuneka ahlambe ukungcola konyaka.
UHarutun wayediniwe ndimlinde esitishini iveki yonke, yayintle ihlobo. Waqhakamshelana nengcongconi yendawo kunye nabangenamakhaya. Iingubo zakhe zajika zaba yirug phantsi. Ubuso bakhe budumbile ukusuka ’kumkhenkce "– iarhente yokucoca iiglasi ze-ethanol enxilayo ngabantu abangamakhaya kunye nezinye-ezijika zibomvu ngokungathi yimbongolo yempimpi. Amehlo akhe azaliswe ziinyembezi, kungekuphela nje ngenxa yentlungu, kodwa neso hangover esibi. Wayehleli kwindawo yokuhamba kwesitishi seMetro. Umnqwazi wakhe wawubekwe phantsi kwaye ulele phantsi. Umntu wayenokubona dime kuyo: enye, ezintlanu, kunye neeshumi zemali. Wahlala emadolweni kwaye elele kancinci. Iifestile kunzima ukuphosa iinyembezi.
– IHarutun? U-Ottila wathi, «yintoni ingxaki yakho?»
– Ah? U-Apchi, -opopu waphakamisa amehlo akhe ngokuthe chu.
– Vuka, uhleli apha? -Ukufika ibug iphakamise umnqwazi wayo.
– Musa ukuchukumisa, apchi. -UHarutun wakhwaza ngokucokisekileyo kwaye wabamba umnqwazi wakhe. Into encinci yatsiba yaphantsi kumhlaba wemarble kwaye yabetha. Ukukhala kwakhala ngabantu abangenamakhaya ababemi kufutshane. Babukeka bebahle kwaye bebancinci.
– Molo ntwana, kuhle, hlukana nengxaki. -khwaza omnye wabo
– Musa ukumkhathaza ukuba ufumane isonka, i-schmuck. -othuka okwesibini.
– Vali, Vali. -xhasa isithathu, -xa usaphila.
– Ngaba uyandixelela abantu abancinci? -I-General Klop yomphenyi wasekhaya wavula amehlo akhe wothuka.
– Yhe? Ewe ayingomntwana konke konke.
– Ngaba kukufota?!
– Ewe, kunye neNegro. Heh. Baqala ukusondela kwi-Bedbug.
«Ikhatriji,» uHarutun wancuma, eguqa. -baleka, mphathi. Ndiza kulibazisa. Ngokufanayo, sele bandibetha kwaye bandenza ukuba ndicele.
– Not ssy, ndiza kubacacisela eSarakabalatanayaksoyodbski ukuba aninakukhubekisa abantu abadala. U-Ottila uphendule ngokuzithemba wasonga imikhono yakhe.
– Ewe, Zyoma, ugqibe kwelokuba abalekele kuthi, – kweyona bastard, intle kakhulu kubo kwaye iyimpandla.
– Grey, yirhuqa ebhakeni. -ixhaswe mncinci kunye nakwii tattoos, zibonisa urn.
– Nditsho kwangoko, hlisa umoya abantu abancinci, ndiyalumkisa okokugqibela. -wabuza ngobubele uKlop, ejonge emehlweni asempilweni. Wayithatha ngebrashi yakhe enkulu ngekhola, wayiphakamisa wayisusa emehlweni akhe. Uye wancuma ehidno wabe ephefumla kabukhali. Wavula amehlo akhe, ngokungathi uza kusongela kwaye wandise umlomo, ngokungathi ufuna ukubeka i-bulb ka-Ilyich emlonyeni wakhe. I-goon yatsala ibrashi kwaye yagoba, ibambe i-groin yakhe ngezandla zombini.
– Ahhhhh!!!! -amanzisa wonke umntu ngeenxa zonke.
U-Ottila wafika ezinyaweni zakhe, kwathi gabhu, wambetha kwakhona iibhola, kodwa ngenqindi.
Wayitshiza ngenqindi umzuzu, ngokukhawuleza kangangokuba kwakunzima ukwahlula izandla zakhe, ekugqibeleni, wabetha isithende kwiapile ka-Adam ngesithende. I-redneck ngokuthe ngcembe yawa ngaphambili kwaye yawa kumgangatho wamarheya nebunzi lakhe, yaphosa yonke into enamathela kuye. U-Ottila ukhonkxwe kwelinye icala, ephosa ukuwa. Amakhaya akhe abhudlwa ngumoya. Kwaye ngokubanzi, inguqu yayihlanjwa kuzo zonke iintlobo ze-freeloaders – iidrawks.
Kwaphakama uAncephalopath, exhasa egxeni lompheki.
– Enkosi, apchi, patron. Ndacinga, apchi, ndiza kufela apha.
– Ufike njani kule? Bandivalele iveki? Kwaye sele utshile.
«Kwaye ngokwakhe?!» UHarutun wacinga, kodwa akazange athethe. U-Ottila wajonga kwakhona kwi-Corporate kunye nerhasi.
– O, Yoshkin ikati, benza ntoni nge-mug yakho?
– Ewe kulungile, apchi, -UHarutun wasusa isandla sakhe wasusa ubuso bakhe obonakalisiweyo: impumlo eyaphukileyo, iifishiti ezimbini phantsi kweliso lokunene nezintathu phantsi kwesobunxele kwaye azikho nelinye ngaphambili izinyo. Ilizwe elikhohlakeleyo labangenakhaya nabanenceba kumntu omnye. Kunzima kakhulu kubadala ukuba baphile kweli lizwe emazantsi.
– Mdaa… kodwa awubuzi malunga neempumlo zabo?
– Hayi, ayikaze ifike engqondweni.. – UHarutun waluka kancinci emva kweBoss wahlafuna ulwimi njengesiqhelo, -kodwa wema! – Watsho ekhwaza, – ewe, ndeva ukuba ubethelelwe kwindawo yobhedu kwindawo yokwamkela kufutshane, kwaye abo-basweleke kwivenkile yakudala.
– Ngoobani, abo? -U-Ottila wamisa.
– Ewe,