More of the World’s Best Drinking Jokes. Edward Phillips

second drunk looked at him sympathetically and said, ‘Have you tried chlorophyll tablets?’

      Down in Cornwall, there’s a pub where the bar is decorated with stuffed fish in glass cases. A drunk wandered round staring at these exhibits with interest. Suddenly he came to an enormous stuffed marlin in a huge case. After studying it carefully for a few moments, he said, ‘The feller that caught that is a damn liar!’

      A very happy gentleman left his West End club and started to make his uncertain way home to his flat in Piccadilly. Halfway through the journey, he bumped into a tree which was surrounded by a protective circle of iron rods. He clutched hold of these rods and went round three times, hand over hand. Then he stopped and shouted in a plaintive voice: ‘Help! I’m trapped! Somebody let me out!’