“And you should unpack your bags. You’ve been here for two weeks, honey. If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were waiting for someone to come and take you back to Seattle.”
“Of course I’m not. I just haven’t gotten around to it. That’s all.”
She wasn’t waiting. Because even if Kaleb showed up in the flesh, she doubted he could convince her to go back with him, unless he got down on bended knee.
And maybe not even then. So why was she picturing him doing just that?
Her mom came over and pressed her cheek against hers. Maddy breathed in the familiar scents that she’d grown up with: rich soil, fresh vegetables and her mom’s lilac perfume. Good clean smells that should be welcoming and comforting. And they were. But more as a landing pad to get her bearings before being shot back out into the world. Only this time she had no idea where she would wind up. Maybe she should just stay here in Gamble Point. Her mother would love it.
As if reading her mind, her mom gave her a quick hug. “Why don’t I give you some time alone to work through some things?” She held out her hand to Chloe. “Do you want to go help your grandma feed some chickens?”
“Yes!” Chloe started to run toward the door only to stop and look back at her mother, as if uncertain if Maddy would be okay by herself.
Her eyes flooded with tears. Her daughter should not have to worry about anything more than chickens.
She forced herself to smile. “Go ahead. Maybe we can go get some ice cream when you come back.”
With that, her mother and her daughter went out the door hand in hand.
A deep ache settled into her chest. Where was she going to go from here?
Back to Seattle? And see Kaleb there and wonder why he hadn’t been able to see past his own hurt to someone else’s?
Ha! As she’d done? She hadn’t been able to see past what Matthew had done all those years ago. Instead, she’d assumed that Kaleb—and every other man—would do the exact same things: abandon her and Chloe in their hour of need.
Hadn’t Kaleb done exactly that?
Yes. He had.
Roxy had told her not to leave. To give him a chance to realize he’d been wrong. “He’s a groveler, you know. Deep down, he is. You just need to give him some time to get those old knee hinges oiled and back in working order.”
Instead, Maddy had packed her bags and had left Seattle, turning her caseload over to other doctors. She’d wanted to hand in her resignation, but the hospital administrator had asked her to take a few weeks of personal vacation time instead.
So that was what she’d done. She’d left Jetta in the care of Roxy. Just in case.
And her bags were still packed in her childhood bedroom. Why? Did she really expect Kaleb to swoop in on a white horse and rescue her?
No, because she didn’t need rescuing. She was a strong woman who’d done just fine on her own. But what she’d wanted was for him to come through for her. Had felt as if she needed him to.
Except she was afraid that Roxy might have been right for once in her life. Maybe she hadn’t given Kaleb enough time to deal with everything that had happened between them.
Should she go and storm back into his life, demanding that he hear her out? And if, afterward, he said he didn’t want to make room in his heart for her and Chloe?
Well, then he could damn well tell her that to her face.
Oh, yes. He definitely could.
That was why her bags were still packed. Because she wasn’t quite ready to give up on the place—or the person—she’d left behind. Not until she knew for sure that it...that he...didn’t want her to stay.
She could start by calling an end to the private party she’d been having in Pity City and making a plane reservation for the earliest possible date.
She was still on the phone with the travel agency when the doorbell rang. She glanced at the back door, hoping she’d see her mother outside, but there was nothing but acres of crops there. The henhouse was about a hundred yards to the south.
Damn.
“I’m sorry. I’ll need to call you back in a few minutes.”
It was probably either a delivery or one of her mom’s field workers with a question. Sliding her phone into the back pocket of her jeans, she headed for the door. She swung it open, ready to tell whoever it was that her mom was out feeding her chickens, except it wasn’t a worker.
And it wasn’t a deliveryman, but he was carrying a small bag.
Kaleb.
She blinked. Opened her eyes.
Nope. Still there.
“May I come in?”
She swallowed. How could he be here when she’d just been thinking of him?
“Of course.” She stepped back so that he could come inside. “What are you doing here?”
He set the bag on the floor. “I’ll get to that. First, is Chloe okay?”
For a split second, she thought something had happened out in the chicken coop, then realized he was just asking in generalities. Her voice cooled. “Yes. She’s fine. But of course you know that.”
“Roxy filled me in on what happened. I’m sorry I left the way I did.” He toed the bag, but his eyes didn’t leave hers.
If he thought she was going to make this easy for him, he was wrong. Yes, she’d been ready to go back to Seattle and demand an explanation, but some of her resolve was wavering now that they were face-to-face. Still, she had to see this through, so she took a deep breath and let him have it.
“You hurt me, Kaleb. You hurt Chloe. We needed you, and you walked away.”
He nodded. “I know. And I have no excuse, other than to say it’s the first time since Grace’s death that I’ve had to face the possibility of losing someone else I’d come to care about.”
“So you thought it was better to turn your back on us instead?”
“Yes. It was stupid and cowardly, but I was also afraid that my past might poison anything we could have together. As a family.”
“A family?” Her heart skipped a beat. “I don’t understand.”
“Every time Chloe feels an ache or has a simple headache, I can’t guarantee I won’t leap to the worst possible conclusion. The thought of forcing you both to live in fear—to witness what I become during those times...” He stopped, a muscle working in his jaw. “I thought it might be in everyone’s best interest if I just left you in peace. But the reality is, I couldn’t bring myself to stay away. And when I went to find you a few days later, they told me you’d left.”
“You didn’t try to call.”
“No. I told myself I had my answer. I should just let you go. It was better for everyone.” He took a step forward. “But I’m not so sure that’s the truth. Because it’s not better for me. And I’m hoping it’s not better for you.”
She swallowed, trying to get rid of the lump in her throat. “I haven’t decided yet.”
“Would it change things if I told you I love you? That I love Chloe?”
She wanted nothing more than to fling herself into his arms, but she couldn’t live with someone who burned hot one minute and cold the next. She’d been there, and it pretty much sucked. “And the next time Chloe has a migraine? Or a stomachache? Will you leave again?”
He reached out and took her hand. “I’m