And that, he reflected bitterly, had been his biggest mistake in this whole crazy mess, because he had no wish to be the real Nathaniel. He’d left the real Nathaniel behind decades ago and that was the way he wanted it to stay.
CHAPTER SEVEN
KATIE woke with the sun on her face. A breeze whispered through the open doors and she could hear the soft lap of water against the edge of the pool.
Aching, happy, she opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was the empty space next to her.
Nathaniel had gone.
A shadow veiled her happiness but she pushed it aside. It was late, wasn’t it? Of course he was already up.
He’d let her sleep late.
Refusing to allow herself to overanalyse what could simply be a thoughtful gesture, she took a quick shower and slid into her favourite canary-yellow sundress. Spotting the tropical flower he’d given her the night before, she slid it into her hair. The scent of it brought everything rushing back and her whole body was suffused with a warm glow. She felt special. Not because of the sex, although that had been incredible—no, the reason she felt special was because he’d confided in her. He’d trusted her with his darkest, deepest secrets—something she suspected he hadn’t shared with anyone before.
As she walked out onto the terrace, she told herself it was ridiculous to feel nervous after the intimacies they’d shared the night before.
Nathaniel was talking on the phone. His hair gleamed in the sunlight and his striking blue eyes were fixed on a point in the distance. Distracted by his flawless features and sensual mouth, Katie’s confidence faltered.
He looked like a superstar.
For a brief, crazy moment she wondered whether she’d imagined the whole thing.
Trying to forget that he was a movie star, she reminded herself that they’d just spent the most incredible night together. They’d connected, not just physically but emotionally. He’d trusted her.
Waiting for him to finish on the phone, she walked forward, wishing she possessed his acting skills. ‘You should have woken me. I didn’t mean to sleep this late.’
‘I had some calls to make. It appears my agent has earned his keep. The situation in London has been smoothed over.’ Reserved and distant, he gestured to the empty chair. ‘Coffee?’
Disappointment thudded into her gut like a fist. That was it? That was what the night had meant to him? Only a few minutes ago she’d woken up feeling as though life couldn’t get any better. The gulf between expectation and reality was shocking.
‘Coffee would be great, thanks.’ Formal. Polite. Two people forced to live together on the island—not two people who had rolled naked and wild, tangling sheets between their heated bodies.
Had it really meant nothing?
‘Help yourself to pancakes and fresh fruit. We have an hour until the helicopter arrives.’
‘Helicopter?’ Katie put the cup down without taking a sip. ‘We’re leaving?’ She was disturbed by just how much that bothered her. A week ago she hadn’t even wanted to come here, and now—
‘Just the island. We’re going to spend some time in Rio.’ Still not looking at her, he scrolled through his emails as if it were the beginning of a normal working day while Katie stared sickly at the food on the table. Embarrassment washed over her. How long had he watched her while she slept? Had he seen her in daylight and regretted what they’d shared? Frustration and anger mingled with the pain. But the anger was mostly directed at herself. Had she really been naïve enough to think she’d interest a man like him?
‘Why are we going to Rio?’
‘I’ve had enough of being trapped on an island. There’s only so much solitude I can take.’ His casual dismissal fed her insecurities and Katie stood quickly, the chair scraping the floor. Her eyes stung.
The rejection sat like a solid lump in the pit of her stomach.
‘Thanks a lot. So the part you’re playing this morning is obviously “utter bastard.’’’
His eyes narrowed warily. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘If you’d been playing “nice guy” you might have thought that what we shared last night was at least deserving of a morning-after smile. You’re making me feel horrid about myself.’
His eyes shone with incredulity. ‘How?’
‘Do you really have to ask? Are you really that insensitive?’ Katie wrapped her arms around herself, wishing she’d taken the time to put on make-up and do her hair before facing him. No woman with any sense would choose the ‘natural’ look around Nathaniel Wolfe. ‘We spent the night together and now you’re doing everything you can to get away from me.’ She felt really foolish for believing even for a moment that they’d shared something special. ‘I understand that what happened yesterday was awful for you. I understand it brought everything back and maybe what we did was heat-of-the-moment stuff. If you regret last night, just say so. But don’t act like nothing happened.’
‘Sit down, Katie.’
‘Why? So that you can make me feel even more insignificant than you have already? I don’t think so. You’re an incredible actor, Nathaniel, but I’m not interested in the actor and you don’t want to be the man.’ Totally squashed, utterly humiliated, she stalked off the terrace, throwing words over her shoulder. ‘Go to Rio. Go to hell. I really don’t care. Just don’t follow me.’
What the hell did she want from him?
His hand shaking, Nathaniel finished his coffee and ordered another one. It had taken all his willpower to leave the bed before she woke. In the end, what had driven him had been the fact that he’d wanted to stay there, wrapped around Katie for ever. And the terror had acted as a jet-propelled engine.
For ever?
He wiped the sweat from his brow with his forearm. Those were words he just didn’t use.
Utterly spooked by his feelings, he hadn’t even trusted himself to look at her when she’d walked onto the terrace. He’d hoped for baggy brown clothes but she’d chosen bright yellow, the colour of sunshine and happiness.
Not that it had taken him long to kill that happiness, he thought bitterly.
Right now she was probably changing back into brown.
Ben brought the coffee to the table, his usually friendly smile absent. ‘I just saw Miss Katie running towards the beach.’ He thumped the pot down on the table and some of it sloshed over the side. ‘Looked like she was crying.’
Nathaniel looked at the puddle of spilled coffee. ‘She just needs space.’
‘Not all folks need space when they’re upset. Miss Katie is the sort who would prefer someone to talk to.’
Meeting Ben’s accusatory look, Nathaniel felt fingers of ice trail down his spine. She wanted to talk about feelings and there was no way he wanted to even think about his feelings, let alone talk about them.
‘You’ve known her five minutes—’
‘Some people you get to know in five minutes because they’re open and friendly. Others …’ Ben’s gaze didn’t shift. ‘Others keep themselves locked away.’
Locked away sounded good to him. ‘Everyone is different.’
‘She’s trying to help you. In all my years I never met a kinder, warmer person than Miss Katie.’
‘I don’t need anyone’s help.’
‘Depends