“You just got home,” he said. “Let’s get you settled in and maybe, in a few days, we’ll give it a go.”
Even though Lance had known about Erin’s love for Christmas, he hadn’t expected she’d want to continue her activities as normal when she got home. But he should have guessed, considering how important it was to her. As he watched the defiant expression cross her face, he knew this wasn’t going to be an easy battle.
That had always been the trouble with Erin. When she got something stuck in her mind, it was almost impossible to convince her to see sense. Wasn’t that what had gotten her into this position in the first place?
He’d told her to let him finish the lights. Had she listened? No. And in a careless moment she’d been injured. At least this time it was only her safety she’d compromised. But what if he hadn’t been able to take care of her? What would she have done with the boys? Would she have had to call her sister home?
Even though everyone told him that Lily’s death was nothing more than a tragic accident, Lance knew that if only Erin had been more careful, more responsible, she would have remembered to lock the door and wouldn’t have fallen asleep. Maybe then, their daughter would still be alive.
“I’ll be fine,” she insisted, struggling to get out of her seat.
As much as Erin claimed she felt fine, she’d slept almost the entire drive back to the ranch. He’d had enough injuries of his own to know that a concussion took longer than most people thought to heal. Add in the pain from her fall and she wasn’t going to be fine for a long time.
“You’ve only just gotten out of the hospital, so let’s take it one step at a time. Starting with getting you into the house.”
He tried not to laugh as she glared at him. It was almost fun, watching her squirm. The look on her face as she glanced down at her foot then up at the stairs leading to the porch was priceless. Though they’d put her in a walking boot, the cast on her right arm would make it difficult for her to grab on to anything for balance.
Plus, it was hard to take her seriously when she was wearing a gaudy Christmas sweater with a giant llama on the front that said, “I llama wish you a Merry Christmas.” Her outfit was absolutely ridiculous, but when she was in the hospital, Lance and the boys had stopped at a discount store to buy them all some necessities for their overnight stay, as well as some things for Lance’s stay at Erin’s, and the boys had insisted that Erin needed that sweater.
She’d accepted the boys’ gift with dignity, but he could tell by the horrified expression on her face that it was a bit much, even for her. Her acceptance of the ugly sweater was one of the many things he’d always loved about her. Erin’s warmth always made people feel...
Lance shook his head. There was a big difference between finding peace with their relationship and remembering those feelings. Best to focus on the task at hand.
“Put your arm around my neck,” he said, bending beside the car. “You can balance on me until you get the hang of walking in that thing.”
She nodded slowly as she scooted out of the seat, putting her arm around him. She’d been in his arms only the day before, when he’d taken her to the hospital, but this felt different. Like... He couldn’t put words to it. But he liked the feeling of Erin trusting him and relying on him. They’d once had it and, somehow, they’d lost it.
Once he got her into the house, he took her to the family room. The space was cozy, with couches arranged by a fireplace and half-opened boxes of decorations in the corner. Some of the decorations were already in place but, judging from the boxes, Erin had a lot more to go.
“Is that end of the couch a recliner?” Lance asked. “The nurse said you should keep your foot elevated as much as possible.”
“Yes,” Erin said. “But I told you, I need to bake cookies today. I have a list, and if I don’t stick to the schedule, I won’t have everything done by the time my sisters get home. We’ll only have a few days before Christmas then, and I don’t want them worrying about everything I didn’t finish.”
Was she kidding? Of course not. Erin didn’t kid about Christmas. If the halls weren’t decked to the nines, she wasn’t happy. And right now, even though most people would call the house decorations perfectly fine, he knew it wasn’t up to Erin’s standards.
Even though Erin would have hated the comparison, her insistence on perfect Christmas décor reminded him of his mother. The only difference was that his mother always hired professional decorators and hosted parties to show off her efforts.
He could at least be thankful Erin wasn’t one to throw a party. How he hated his mother’s parties, with all the fake cheer and plastic smiles, pretending to be the perfect family.
At least Erin never pretended things were perfect when they weren’t.
“They’re going to understand,” Lance told her. “You’ve got a broken ankle and a broken arm. It’s not going to kill anyone to not have everything done perfectly. Besides, if you bake the cookies now, they’ll be spoiled by Christmas.”
“Not if you freeze them,” she said, removing her arm from his shoulder. “And just because you hate Christmas doesn’t mean the rest of us can’t celebrate the way we want.”
“I do not hate Christmas,” he said through gritted teeth. They’d barely gotten Erin home and already they were starting in to their old patterns. “I just think that all this nonsense isn’t necessary. There’s nothing wrong with getting some cookies from the bakery, dumping a packet of hot chocolate into a mug of hot water, and sitting in front of a tree that doesn’t look like Rudolph vomited on it.”
“That’s disgusting,” Erin said as she stepped away. “And that is exactly the problem between us. I see the beauty in holiday decorations and you want to compare them to animal waste.”
At this rate, she was going to take another tumble. Maybe not off a ladder, but it was still going to hurt.
“I just think less is more,” he said, trying to sound calm. “It’s your house, and you can do whatever you want. But the nurse said you have to stay off that foot and keep it elevated for the first few days.”
He held an arm out to her. “Come on, Erin. I don’t want to fight. I’m just trying to keep you safe. If having homemade cookies means so much to you, we’ll figure it out. After you rest.”
Tears filled her eyes. Lance squeezed his eyes shut and started to count to ten. The last thing he needed was for her to start crying on him. Why did she have to be so emotional about everything?
When he got to nine, Erin took his arm. “I just want to have the perfect Christmas.”
He opened his eyes and looked at her. “You don’t need to have all this stuff for that. Besides, you guys had this place last year. Didn’t you get to do everything then?”
“I had the flu. We got the decorating mostly done, but I got sick before I got to enjoy any of it,” she said, a sad look crossing her face. “I didn’t even get to watch the boys open the hats Shane had bought them. Plus, we got a lot of decorations on clearance after Christmas last year, so this is the first we’ll get to use them.”
The tone of her voice and the way her forehead was wrinkling made him realize that some of the emotion he was witnessing was sheer exhaustion on her part. Not only was she injured and on painkillers, she was obviously under a lot of strain—trying to plan the perfect Christmas, taking care of her nephews on her own and now having to deal with him. He might, as she’d often accused him, be low on the emotional intelligence scale, but he could at least tell that what Erin really needed at this point was a nap.
“We’ll make it work,” he said softly, putting his arm around her and leading her toward the couch. She didn’t fight him, just looked up at him sadly.
“If you say so,” she said.
Lance got her