“You were knocked unconscious, damn it. You’re not going to do anyone any good when the adrenaline wears off and you find yourself flat on your back with a concussion.”
“The only thing that’s wrong with me is that I’ve lost my son.”
“You’re scared spitless and bleeding and running on nerves and your own hard head—”
“Don’t you dare try to shut me out of this. I’m not going to sit it out.”
“You’re out of control.”
She advanced on him, shaking so violently she didn’t trust her legs. “You’re damn right I am! I thought you might feel the same way, but obviously, your heart is still as cold as it ever was!”
She hadn’t meant to go there. Hadn’t meant to say those words or make this any more personal than it already was. Her control broke with an almost audible snap! The tears came in a rush. A useless, humiliating show of emotion that wasn’t going to accomplish anything except give her a wham-banger of a headache and prove to the men in this room she wasn’t going to be much help. She struggled valiantly to staunch the sobs that wrenched from deep in her chest, but they were powerful and shook her from head to toe.
Realizing the room had gone utterly silent, Kelly sucked in a breath and stopped herself cold. Buzz stared at her as if she’d just announced that she was an alien and would be moving back to her own planet in another galaxy at the end of the week. Tony Colorosa and Pete Scully had found something fascinating in the wood planks of the floor. John Maitland stared at the map. Jake scratched at a non-existent stain on the felt of his hat, his brows knitting as if in intense concentration.
Knowing her credibility was on the line, she let out the breath she’d been holding and addressed the men. “Eddie also has a flashlight with him. Since it’s dark, he may have it on. It’s plastic and not very bright, but the batteries were new, so it should be working.”
Buzz cleared his throat. “If that’s all….”
She jerked her head. “Please, find him. I want him back.”
He addressed his team. “Let’s get this show on the road, gentlemen.” He looked at his pilot. “Do your best for me, will you, Flyboy?”
“Piece of cake.” Some of the cockiness went out of Tony’s expression when he glanced at Kelly. “We’ll find him, Ms. Malone.”
Because she couldn’t speak, she nodded her thanks and within seconds, the men had grabbed their canvas equipment bags and rushed out the rear entrance, leaving an uncomfortable silence in their wake.
Without speaking to her, Buzz left the room and picked his coat off the floor in the hall. Kelly followed. “I’m sorry I broke down like that,” she said.
“You’re entitled.”
“I know this is hard for you, too.”
He turned to her, striking her with a gaze as sharp and cold as an alpine winter. “Whatever you do, don’t apologize.”
“Buzz….”
“I still plan to rake you over the coals.”
“Well, I certainly don’t want to miss out on that.”
Buzz shot her a thin smile. “That’s one of the things I’ve missed about you, Kel.”
“What’s that?”
“Your smart mouth.”
“Not something to base a relationship on, I guess.”
“I guess not.” Grimacing, he started toward the door. “Let’s get out to the site.”
“I hope it doesn’t rain, Bunky Bear.” Eddie Malone shone the flashlight on the stuffed animal’s face, wishing the little bear could say something back. “Mommy always told me thunder was just this big guy up in the sky throwing thunderbolts, but I didn’t really believe it. I didn’t tell her ’cause I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, but I thought that was a really dumb story.”
Bunky Bear stared back at him with his one good eye and a little smile on his mouth that always made Eddie laugh. But Eddie wasn’t laughing tonight. He was scared. More scared than he’d ever been in his whole life.
It had all started when he’d dropped Bunky Bear down that big hill. He’d tried not to cry, but he’d wanted his bear back. Mommy had climbed down after Bunky, but the branch she was holding onto had snapped and she rolled and rolled all the way down the hill. It had scared Eddie even more when he called out to her and she didn’t answer. When he’d climbed down after her, she was asleep. He tried to wake her, but she wouldn’t wake up. He knew he shouldn’t cry, but it scared him so much he just couldn’t help it. He’d sat down beside her and cried for a long time.
Then he saw the cut on her head and thought he should go for help. Isn’t that what Captain Kudo on “Kudos and Kids” would do? Knowing it was the only way to save his mom, Eddie had grabbed Bunky Bear, stuffed him in his backpack and started back toward the campground where Aunt Kim would know what to do. He’d thought for sure he was going the right way. But it seemed like he walked forever and never got back to the campground. Then the wind had started blowing, and it started getting dark.
Snuggled up against Bunky Bear, Eddie shivered and huddled deeper into his jacket. “Don’t worry, Bunky Bear,” he said. “Mommy’s okay. She’s a good hiker and knows everything there is to know about camping and stuff.”
The rumble of thunder in the distance made his teeth chatter. He looked up, saw the sky flicker. Around him, the treetops swayed and whispered. He wished it wasn’t so dark. He hadn’t been quite so scared when the sun was shining.
He wished Mommy would hurry up and find him so they could go home.
Buzz didn’t bother with the speed limit on the way to White River Campground, and the trip took less than half an hour. Using his cell phone en route, he checked in with the ranger station where the base camp for the search had been set up, as well as the Lake County Sheriff’s Department to see how the search was progressing. Neither agency reported any sign of Eddie. Another call to his contact at the Chaffee County Sheriff’s Department told him a team of scent-trained bloodhounds would be brought in at first light. Buzz hoped to God they found him by morning. If they didn’t, he hated to wait that long to bring in the dogs, but he knew how difficult nighttime searches were.
Next to him, Kelly stared into the darkness beyond the window as silent and still as a mannequin. The tension coming off her was palpable. Buzz felt his own tension like a knot being drawn ever tighter in his chest. But as angry as he was with her, another side of him felt a pang of compassion every time he looked at her and saw the profound sadness in her eyes. He wasn’t going to let her down.
A hundred questions rang in his head. Even though Buzz knew now wasn’t the time to raise them, there was a small part of him that wanted to know everything about his son. He wanted to know how tall he was. What he liked to eat. His favorite stories and movies and toys. If he took after his mother—or, God forbid, him. Another side of him—the side that was an ex-detective and had worked some of the worst child abuse cases in the city—cringed at the thought of bringing something so precious as a child into a world that was many times less than kind to the innocent.
Feeling the urgency press into him with an almost physical force, all too aware of the minutes ticking by and the fire raging just a few miles to the north, Buzz looked at his watch, felt another snap of tension go through his system. Eleven o’clock. Eddie had been missing for five hours now. As an ex-cop, and now a Search and Rescue professional, he knew all too well how much could happen in five hours.
Where are you, son?
Surprise rippled through him