As if he had read her mind, Nathaniel crossed the space separating them and moved behind her, linking his arms around her waist. He rested his chin on top of her head. “I hope you’re ready for bed,” he said.
“I am pretty tired.”
He spun her around to face him and bent to stare into her eyes. “Please tell me that was a joke. I should get stars in my crown for keeping my hands off you all day.”
“You were too busy with the traffic to notice me.”
“Don’t fish for compliments, elf. I’m obsessed with you, and it’s damned uncomfortable.”
Nathaniel had never meant to be so honest. But his moments with Dani were slipping away. He couldn’t afford to waste a single one.
Tonight seemed like an ending—bittersweet and momentous at the same time. He was damned tempted not to let her go. Her openness and caring were the antithesis of the way he lived his life. Keeping her would be not only dangerous, but selfish. He couldn’t imagine a future without her, but he knew he wasn’t equipped to be the man she needed.
He undressed her carefully and then removed the athletic pants he had donned after his shower. They climbed into bed without speaking. He pulled her to the center of the mattress and wrapped his arms around her. “I don’t want to hurt you, Dani.”
Dani went rigid in his embrace. “I can take care of myself,” she said, the words tart. “Maybe you should worry about me hurting you.”
He smiled in the darkness. She was reminding him that their relationship was a two-way street. What she couldn’t know was that he had gone years without letting women get close enough to penetrate the walls around his heart. If anyone had the power, it would have been Dani. But he was in no danger. He held all the cards.
As long as he remained in control, everything would go according to plan. He could assign Dani to a new division and gradually wean himself from her allure.
He hadn’t allowed himself to fall in love with her. That was how he knew everything was going to be okay.
For the next hour, he lost himself in the pleasure of her body. The sex was as good as it had ever been, but something was a little off. His Christmas elf wasn’t as open with him as before. She held something back. Put up a few no-trespassing signs.
Her reticence might have been infuriating if he hadn’t been balls deep in making love to her. Not loving her. There was a difference.
Each time he made her come, he was jubilant. She might have other lovers after him, but he was determined she wouldn’t be able to erase the memories of tonight.
Beyond that testosterone-fueled goal lingered a strange mixture of elation and terror. His body was sated, lax with bone-deep pleasure. He held Dani close and buried his face in her hair.
It was only sex, he told himself desperately. Only sex...
* * *
Morning came far too soon. Peaches had given them a good six-hour stretch, taken a bottle and then gone right back to sleep until almost eight o’clock. Even so, Nathaniel wanted to spend the morning in bed. With Dani.
As they took turns getting ready, his lover was quiet. It was just as well. He had nothing witty to say, no funny quips about melting snow or holiday blues or poopy diapers.
Dani’s mother was preparing Christmas lunch for the midday meal. Dani and Nathaniel were instructed to arrive no later than eleven in order to have time for opening presents and taking official family photos.
The Meadows family owned fifteen acres of land outside of town. Their property ran alongside a rich river bottom and up the side of a small hill. Dani had told him stories about running barefoot through fields of cotton and catching fireflies on hot summer nights.
He was charmed in spite of himself. Such rustic, simple pleasures were a million miles away from his own upbringing. Oftentimes as a kid, he’d spent hours at the kitchen table, figuring out homework on his own and listening to the ticking of the mantel clock as it echoed in their elegant, lonely home.
Shaking off the maudlin thoughts, he concentrated on maneuvering the Hummer around Gainesville. “Nice town,” he said.
“It was a fun place to grow up. I love Atlanta, though. I’m a big-city girl at heart. I even thought about moving to New York at one time.”
“But?”
“It’s expensive. And I would miss my family. Atlanta is home.”
At a red light, he braked and glanced in the rearview mirror. “Is she doing okay?”
“Almost asleep. I wish we could drive around long enough for her get a good nap. Mom expects promptness, though. My siblings and I learned that the hard way. If we came in late from a date or a party, we’d be grounded for two weeks. It was effective punishment.”
“Don’t take this wrong, but it sounds like the Meadowses are a typical American family. It’s nice.”
Dani shrugged. “You could say that. Still, even typical American families have problems, Nathaniel. Normalcy doesn’t exempt anyone from pain and tragedy.”
He mulled over her odd answer as they drove ever closer to Dani’s childhood home. Was she trying to tell him something, or was he reading too much into her words?
When they finally made it to the other side of town and out into the country, Nathaniel thought they were home free. The sky was gray and the trees bare, but it was warm—fifty degrees already. He hadn’t counted on the scenic creek that ran through the Meadowses’ property.
To ascend the drive that led to the house, it was necessary to cross the creek on a narrow concrete bridge. Today, the creek was a raging river...and rising rapidly.
Dani’s hands gripped the dash and the door, white-knuckle. “I don’t like this, Nathaniel.”
“Hummers were meant for situations like today,” he said. “There’s barely any water over the bridge yet, so I’ll take it slow and we’ll be fine.”
They inched their way forward. The water was still rising, but certainly not fast enough to sweep the Hummer off the bridge. For a brief moment, it occurred to him he might be getting stuck with Dani in another weather-related situation, but he ignored the thought. He tightened his grip on the wheel and pressed the gas pedal carefully.
The vehicle kept a gratifying grip on the road surface. “See,” he said. “You were worried about nothing.”
In the next second, he saw a large section of creek bank in front of them crumble into the muddy water. With a loud, groaning crack, a corner of the concrete bridge gave in to forces it was never meant to withstand.
“Hold on,” Nathaniel yelled. They were six feet from safety. More of the concrete could give way at any moment. He gunned the engine, floored the gas pedal and made the unwieldy vehicle lurch forward like an elephant released from a slingshot.
Everything happened in slow motion. Dani screamed. Another chunk of the bridge sheared off. But the Hummer came through for him. They landed on firm ground, inches away from the disaster they had so narrowly missed.
He shifted into Park with a shaky hand and reached for Dani. “God, I’m sorry. Are you okay?” They glanced at the back seat in unison, reassuring themselves that the baby had slept through it all.
Dani nodded, her face milk white. “I’m fine. It wasn’t your fault.”
It was, and he would kick himself for that later, but now all he wanted to do was reassure himself they were alive. He cupped Dani’s head in two hands and turned