‘And what have you been up to, miss?’ Alice’s mother greeted her with a scowl. ‘What did you go dashing off like that for?’
‘I felt sick,’ Alice admitted, because she couldn’t get out of it. ‘I think there’s a bug going round at work. I must have got a touch of it.’
‘Yeah, several girls at the factory are off sick too,’ Mavis said, swiftly coming to Alice’s aid. ‘I felt a bit sick myself this morning …’
‘Well, I hope you don’t give it to me,’ their mother said unsympathetically. ‘I’ve got meself a little job scrubbing floors at the offices down the Docks. I can’t rely on your father bringing in money so I’m off to earn a wage meself. It means yer’ll ’ave to see to yerselves and yer brothers for breakfast from now on.’
Alice and Mavis looked at each other in relief as she left the kitchen. ‘I’ll do the washing up,’ Mavis offered. ‘You have to get to work before me, Alice – if you’re home early you can tidy up or get the vegetables done.’
‘Thanks, Mave,’ Alice said. ‘Are you goin’ out this evening with your fella?’
‘Might be,’ Mavis said and grinned at her. She turned on Saul as he grabbed another slice of toast and spread the rich fatty dripping on it. ‘Oi, take it easy with that, you greedy monkey, or you’ll be sick too.’
‘I’ll blame it on Alice if I am,’ he quipped. ‘If I was sick I wouldn’t have to go to school. I could go down the Docks wiv me mates and find meself a job.’
‘No, you couldn’t,’ Alice said sharply. ‘You have to work hard at school so that you can get a good job when you leave. Do you want to stand in line like Dad all the time and hope for a few hours’ work?’
‘That’s his fault,’ Saul said. ‘If he weren’t drunk and late all the time he’d get more work. They won’t take him because he’s unreliable.’
Alice didn’t answer as she took her coat from behind the door and went out into the street. Her young brother was right, of course, but her father drank because it was the only way he could bear his life – and that was Alice’s mother’s fault. Her tongue was like a razor and she never gave her poor husband a minute’s peace, even when he wasn’t drunk.
Pulling her coat collar up around her neck to keep out the icy wind, Alice walked quickly. It had been a close thing this morning. If Mavis hadn’t intervened about girls at the factory going sick, their mother might have suspected that Alice was pregnant. She wasn’t sure how much longer she could keep her mother at bay, and she was terrified of the row that would erupt once her secret was out. Her mother would raise hell and then she’d throw Alice into the street. She didn’t know what she would do if that happened and she was close to despair. Oh, why had she ever let Jack get her into this mess?
So far she didn’t show very much so she should be able to keep her job for a while but what was she going to do when it became obvious? Her mind felt numb with fear and she couldn’t think past the day when her mother found out.
Smothering her sigh, she nodded and began to walk as fast as she dare; it had frozen again last night and the pavements were icy. During the worst of the weather, shops and factories had closed, because the electric kept going off and even the schools had shut their doors some days because they were too cold for the children. Alice thought it seemed a little better this morning and she didn’t want to spend money on a tram while she could manage the walk, because she would need all her money once her condition left her homeless and without a job.
‘Alice,’ Nan called to her as she entered the home, still hurrying; it had taken her longer to walk to work, because of the slippery pavements. ‘I wanted a word with you, please.’
‘Yes, Nan?’ Alice paused, the breath catching in her throat because she was always aware that she was here on probation. One false move and Sister Beatrice would send her packing. ‘Do you need me to do something?’
‘One of the children in room five was sick all over her bed this morning. I think there must be a bug going round. I’ve been busy since I got here and I haven’t had time to clear it up. Can you change all the sheets and covers and take them to the dirty laundry room, please?’
‘Yes, of course,’ Alice said, relieved that it was just a straightforward request to clean up a bed. ‘I’ll be glad to.’
‘Make sure to wash your hands afterwards. We don’t want you to go down with the sickness, Alice. I’ve enough trouble with the kitchen staff. Muriel was complaining of feeling a bit under the weather first thing. If she goes off sick I’ll be left with all the cooking.’
‘I don’t mind working a bit longer today,’ Alice volunteered. ‘I don’t need a lunch break, just a cup of tea.’
‘You need to keep your strength up,’ Nan said, looking at her with concern. ‘You’ve been a bit pasty recently, Alice. You’re not sickening for anything yourself?’
‘No, I’m all right, thanks,’ Alice replied more cheerfully than she felt. ‘If you need me to stay on, just ask.’
‘You’re a good girl, Alice.’ Nan hesitated, then, ‘It was a pity about what happened to your boyfriend, Alice – though perhaps you’re better off without his sort.’
Alice didn’t answer. Any girl in her position wanted to be married and respectable. Alice knew that once her condition became known people would turn their backs on her and whisper about her. Girls who went with men before marriage were not considered decent where she came from. You might be poor and you might have to mend your stockings and the holes in your clothes, but you kept yourself decent if you wanted to hold your head up high. Alice had broken the code when she’d let Jack make love to her and she was going to have to pay for it soon enough.
As she turned away, Nan touched her arm. ‘If you’re ever in trouble, Alice, come to me. I’m sure I can find a way to help …’
Alice stared after her. How could Nan know that she was in trouble? Of course she couldn’t – surely there was no way anyone could guess her secret yet?
The old house was silent apart from the whispering of the wind in the eaves and the occasional soft tread of a carer’s footstep as she passed their room. Someone had looked in about ten minutes earlier, which was what had woken Nancy, and then she’d heard her brother whimpering in his sleep and the words he muttered sent chills down her spine. No one else must ever hear what he was saying or they would both be in terrible trouble.
‘Listen to me, Terry,’ Nancy said, leaning down to whisper close to his ear. ‘You’ve got to behave, because if you don’t they might try to separate us again. You’ll be taken somewhere they put bad boys – no, you’re not bad, but they’ll think you are if you say things like that – and they might lock us away in prison. You don’t want that, do you? You mustn’t ask who locked the door … if you do they might put us both in prison.’
Terry clutched at her hand, his dark eyes wide and fearful as he gazed up at her. ‘I don’t want to say, Nance, but the dreams keep coming. I’m frightened that he’ll come after me again. Next time he’ll kill me …’
‘Pa won’t hurt you no more,’ Nancy said, reaching out to smooth his dark curly hair back from his forehead. He felt damp to her touch, because he’d been sweating. The nightmares kept on returning and then he woke screaming, his body drenched. ‘I told you, he died in that fire. Him and Ma …’
‘I didn’t want Ma to die.’ Terry’s eyes spilled their tears.