and my right hand on his head. I can't hold it in any longer wake up please Julian please wake up! I need you… Avery needs you! What am I going to do without you! Tell me what to do… what do I do… tell me what to do! I wipe the tears away and begin to pull myself together. I grab my purse and look for my phone. It's way too early I don't want to wake Gloria right now. I don't want to make her worry even more right now. I did reassure her though. That I would call as soon as the doctor came in to see him. I grab my bag of clothes and head for the restroom. I decide to shower first before I call her and get my thoughts together. As i'm getting out of the shower I hear the phone ringing. I rush to grab it but i'm to late. I check to see who it was that's funny no missed calls. I double check by going to the call log nothing. Weird I could of sworn I heard the phone ringing. I grab the chair out of the corner and pull it up to side of the bed next to him. I grab his hand and place it in mine. I put my head on our hands and begin to pray. I know if any one can hear me. It's you God. I know you can make all this ok. We claim to be Catholics but we don't attend church as we should. I know we don't pray as much as we should either. I know we are everyday sinners. But we are believers. I know only you have the last say in all this. So please please lord give us the strength to get through this and to overcomes this Amen. I decided to call Gloria. The phone rang twice and then I heard fast raspy voice. Hello? Gabbi. is he ok? Yes he's fine ? Que Pasa? What is it she asked. The Dr. will be coming in shortly I want everyone here to hear what he has to say. Ok Mija will get ready and head that way. Once I hung up with my mother in law I dialed my mom. I asked her to pick up Avery for me as soon as she could so that way Nick can come to the hospital. I also asked her to continue to pray for him. Before i could hang up the phone the nurse came in. Ill call you later mom I have to go! I'm just going to change his fluid bags and check his vitals. Are you ok Hun? you look a little tired. I smiled and nod. I watched as she put a new bag of fluid on the hook and connects it to the tube that flows into his hand. She checked the paper that was feeding out of the machine and checked his vitals. All is good if you need anything you just give us a call. I smiled lightly and thanked her. It is so quiet in here so i turn on the TV and watch the news. A few minutes later I remember I forgot to call Issa. I call her just in case my mother in law forgot. Hello. Issa. I say, has your mom called you. Yes she has we are getting in the car now will be there shortly. Have you talked to Nick? Yes he texted me he is waiting on your mom to pick up Avery and he will come afterwards. My parents should be getting there soon. No one has heard from Anthony yet but we will keep trying. Anthony! Yeah i'm sure he will come I don't see why he wouldn't. I'm sorry I didn't mean it like that Issa I'am just surprise that's all. Ok will see you in a few minutes. Do you need anything food clothes, hygiene? I'm fine I had a bag of clothes that I packed. As far as eating ill go down to the cafeteria in a little while thank you though. I know I lied to all of them but I didn't want to repeat myself to every single one of them. I prefer they all ask the same questions now to get it over with. I didn't even consider trying to contact Anthony it's been so long since we have seen him and when I say we I mean everyone but Julian. My in laws arrived first. My mother in law immediately hugged me and asked how I was doing? But i couldn't respond instead I hugged her tight. She squeezed me tighter I know mija yo se'. Once my mother in law lets me go she went to stand by Julian. Just as I was about to take a seat. My sister in law Issa walks in with her family. Issa hugs me and tells me were gonna get through this. If you need anything don't be afraid to ask. i'm here, rick is here, just let us know. Were you able to get any sleep last night? I shake my head letting her know “no” she rubs my shoulders and says you need rest it's not good for you. I nod my head letting her know I agree. She turns to grab her girls and leads them to Julian's bed. Ricardo is standing right behind them he has his hands on her shoulders. Were all here brother. We all love you very much. She stops for a few seconds because she is choked up. You don't stop fighting you hear me? you hold on… you have Avery and Gabbi who need you! By now my tears are falling like rain. I knew the family getting here would only make things harder. Once everyone was seated I inform them that they just missed the Dr. I begin to explain how the medication they are giving him is not helping there has been no progress. I also make them aware of our choices to keep him on the machine but with the possibility of him being brain dead. Or..... before I can let it out I take a long pause cause i'm fighting hard to keep my voice from cracking and my tears from falling. We can remove the machines and see how long he last on his own. See if his body will respond and will continue to fight. I don't know where to look right now my eyes are focused on mother in law who's tears won't stop coming down. I glance at my father in law and I can't make out what he is thinking he looks numb. Issa has her head in her hands taking it all in. Issa's three girls are standing in the corner crying. No one is saying anything everyone is quiet all i hear are sobs. They encourage us to talk to him. The Dr. said he can hear us. It stays quiet for a few minutes then I see my mother in law stand up she grabbed her purse and leaves the room. A few minutes later Gloria returns with Nick. After a good fifteen minutes Issa broke the silence hey Nick did you get a hold of Anthony? He is driving home he said he will be here no later than four. Did he say why he wasn't answering our calls or text. I knew by Issa's tone in her voice this couldn't be good. No he didn't. He just said he would be here as soon as he could. So now he wants to come rushing home! Really Issa? you want to bring up this shit now? just be glad he is coming. Ricardo obviously knew where this was going he placed his hand on issas thigh and told her to calm down. But issa ignored it and continued on. Ya… you go ahead and keep defending your precious brother. Whatever Issa… You ask him when he gets here. Don't take this shit out on me. We all have lives that we get caught up in. So He cant take a weekend from his busy life to come see his parents who raised him. No one is that busy Nick but you keep believing his lies. By now Issa and Nick are not just exchanging words their arguing. Ricardo stood up and signaled his girls with his head to come on. Once they left the room Nick continues to argue with Issa. How many times have you gone to see him? huh. Julian and I invited you plenty of times but you could never go right your always busy with your kids and precious husband right! Issa face is saying she wants to kick her little brothers ass. Instead she looks at me and says anytime you want to kick him out Gabbi is ok with me. In a deep sharp voice my father in law tells them to get out. The both of them. Way to go Issa look what you did! Sorry papa sorry Gabbi I'll be in the waiting room if you need anything mom.
Nick
As we make our way to the waiting room I walk behind Issa and slowly shove her like the way I use to when we were kids. You just couldn't keep your mouth shut could you! I didn't expect what was coming when we entered the waiting room. She turned around and swatted me on my head and place me on the first chair she found. Look you little mocoso I love all three you little pain in the asses but when my mom calls crying every night cause she hasn't heard from none of you. It upsets me and I want to call you little asses and cuss all of you out. How hard is it to pick up the damn phone and say hi mom just calling to see how your doing? Do you need anything? Or to take a day out of your got damn busy life's to spend an hour or two with the people who raised you and who were there for you, who loved and fed you. Who worry about you, who put a roof over your head. But none of you think of that. None of stop to think of your mom. Why? cause the world revolves around you guys and the shit you all have going on? right?! I don't know if the anger i'm feeling right now is because Issa is going off on me or what she is saying has truth. I come and go as I please i stay out late partying and don't bother to call. Cause I assume i'll see them tomorrow. I've heard my mom on the phone with Issa crying saying she called Anthony he is still too busy to come visit and that she called Julian asking him to take her to an appointment but he couldn't get out of work. I don't know why these things bother her so much she knows Anthony is away in college and Julian is only working for his family right now. But Issa being a mother of three. She gets it… plus it's always her helping out my parents making sure they're OK. Going with them to doctor appointments and filling out paperwork. I push my anger aside and put my arm around her. I pull her in to hug her. I love you Issa it's all going to be ok. I kiss her forehead I know she's scared. I love you mocuso!
Chapter Three Alyna & Anthony
I'm not sure what to do but I know I don't have much time. So I told him I could be ready in twenty to thirty minutes. Once I got home I placed Kayden in his swing so I could gather our things. I'm not sure what type of clothing to pack so I grab a few things regular tees, blouses, jeans,
