Launching Your Autistic Youth to Successful Adulthood. Katharina Manassis

Macy’s mother struggled with mental health issues, so she was raised by her grandparents. They adored Macy, but knew that she needed to learn to do many things without their help. At the beginning of high school, they consulted her special education teacher on how to further Macy’s independent learning. Based on the teacher’s advice, they enrolled her in courses which were challenging but consistent with her abilities, set up an organizer where upcoming assignments and tests were recorded, and set a regular homework time. They encouraged Macy to ask for help if needed, but expressed confidence that with effort she could do most of the work herself. She did. They used a similar approach when encouraging Macy to contact and see her friends.

      When Macy was overwhelmed, they hugged her and encouraged slow breathing until she was calm. Then, they looked at the problem she was facing and asked, “What are some different things you could do?” They gave her a quarter for every idea to encourage her thinking, and then helped her select an idea that might work. Soon, Macy calmed down quickly when upset and started to think of more ideas. By the end of high school, she was making many decisions independently, including decisions related to her social life and vocational plans. She knew her grandparents were in her corner though, protecting her from any truly dangerous choices but otherwise praising her emerging autonomy.