Ten Winning Ways to Soothe a Baby
When nothing you do seems to calm Baby and a vicious circle of increasing tension between you and your little one makes you wonder what came first, your tension or Baby’s unhappiness, it’s time to step back and try these simple but effective tips. One or other is sure to settle your baby – and your nerves!
•Rock your baby. Rocking is unfashionable nowadays because moms are so often told that it will breed bad habits, yet it remains one of the best ways to soothe a distressed baby. You rocked him in the cradle of your pelvis while pregnant. Even adults, when in pain or distress, will resort to rhythmic, rocking movements for self-comfort. Rocking can take the form of firm but gentle patting, pushing to and fro on the same spot in the pram, gentle bouncing on your lap or swaying to and fro in your arms. If it works for you and your baby, do not take criticism to heart. If Baby’s distress does not seem to improve in time, re-evaluate potential contributing factors – these might be emotional or physical.
•Bath with your baby. Even if your baby seems not to enjoy bathtime, being held securely in Mom’s arms in a deep, warm, aromatic tub of water will never be rejected by an unsettled little one. Keep the lights low and if need be drape a cloth over her for a feeling of extra security. Feed her in the bath or simply hum a lullaby until you notice the tension draining from her body.
•Massage these magic points. Most distressed babies respond exceptionally well to a light circular massage of the point between the eyebrows and on the temples, using your index fingers. Also try up-and-down movement behind the ears and circular massage on the breastbone between the nipples or a finger-width below the navel. When massaging the point between the eyebrows, do not cover Baby’s face with your hand but rather approach from the forehead.
•Take Baby for a walk. And just where will you find the energy, do I hear you asking? Remember that walking will soothe both your on-edge nerves and your baby’s restlessness. Movement is therapy for body and soul, especially if rhythmic and not driven by a specific goal. Whether it is time passing that soothes a niggling baby or simply watching the world go by, the results speak for themselves. Best of all is that you both profit.
•Dance with your baby. So what if you dance badly? Dancing is fun and fun is one of the best de-stressors. Choose music you love and that inspires your every movement. Your baby will enjoy the rhythmic movement and reward you with a look of total admiration. In turn you will also relax and thrive on the experience.
•Nurse your baby. One of the best ways to settle a crying baby is to put him to the breast. Almost instantaneously peace descends and everyone can breathe a sigh of relief. A number of issues need to be borne in mind here. Feeding should not become a power struggle or an easy way to provide solace. But breastfeeding needs to be understood differently. It is more than nutrition. Comfort and closeness to Mom is just as important. So long as you are not putting Baby to the breast every half hour throughout the day on repeated occasions or never try any other soothing ways, you need not be concerned.
•Do a bit of reflexology massage of Baby’s feet. You need not be an expert, although you might find it helpful to ask a reflexologist to show you a few techniques. Most babies love having their feet rubbed, so long as you do not tickle. ‘Walk’ your thumb over all parts Baby’s feet. Then ‘pick up’ each little toe (pull gently away from the foot) and rotate a few times. This is deeply relaxing and guaranteed to put a smile back on Baby’s face.
•Remind Baby of the time in the womb. This can be done in various ways. Carry Baby close to your body in the age-old ‘abba’ style or in a baby pouch. Play the music you often listened to while pregnant. Converse with your baby so that she can focus on that special voice she has known since conception. Lie with her on your tummy, naked skin touching and stroke her back.
•Blow raspberries on Baby’s tummy. Place your lips on either side of Baby’s navel and blow bubbles. It is a tickly sensation but delights most babies. You might need to precede it with one of the other soothers so that Baby is not crying when you begin. Do stop when you notice Baby indicating that this is no longer fun.
•Leave Baby with someone known and trusted. If none of these soothers seems to work for you and your baby, this might be because the tension cycle has spiralled out of hand. Take an hour off and leave Baby with someone else. You are not failing as a mother but simply need a little bit of distance and rest to be able to restore effective communication between you and your baby. Don’t worry while you are separated – your baby will be just fine and life will seem a lot rosier once you are together again.
Four
Multiples and Premature
Multiples
This is the name given when a mother carries more than one baby at a time in her womb. Most common are twins, which occur about once in every 90 to 100 births, with more black than white women giving birth to twins. Triplets are fairly rare, occurring once in about 9 000 pregnancies and quadruplets, quintuplets and so on are even less frequent. Multiples (other than twins) are more often than not the result of fertility drugs, very rarely occurring naturally.
Expecting multiples is both exciting and daunting. Contact the SA Multiple Birth Association for support groups and any literature they may have available. They are also often aware of special deals for parents of multiples. Contact Directory enquiries and ask for the number of the branch closest to you.
DEVELOPMENT OF TWINS
Twins are formed in one of two ways. Fraternal twins are most common, with each developing baby having its own placenta and amniotic sac. Two separate eggs from the mother are fertilised by two separate sperm cells from the father. These two children, although of the same age, will not be more alike than any other siblings, although they often share a closer bond, probably due to their communication in the womb and their shared babyhood.
Identical (or maternal) twins are formed when an already fertilised egg cell divides into two, for reasons not yet clearly understood. The genetic material of