– A ʻo ka mea ʻoluʻolu loa, «i hoʻomau ai ka mea hoʻolaha,» … hoʻokahi kumu mai Irkutsk he punahele ʻo Nikolai Vasilyevich Gogol a hoʻowahāwahā wale ʻia kāna hana, ʻoiai ʻo ia ka hana «NOS». ʻO koʻu ola a pau kaʻu mea i mālama ai i ke kālā no ka huakaʻi i Leningrad (ʻo St. Petersburg), kahi i hoʻopaʻa ʻia ai kahi hōʻailona nui me ka ihu o kahi ihu keleawe, e like me Gogolevsky. Akā ua hoʻokahuli ʻo Perestroika i nā hoʻolālā āpau; ua hoʻopio ʻo ia i kāna mau kumuwaiwai a pau ma OJSC MMM a, e like me nā miliona miliona o ka poʻe mālama, ua waiho ʻia me ka lua donat. Ua hōʻoluʻolu a hoʻoluʻolu ʻo ia me ke kīmi ʻana ma Myocardial infarction, ua hoʻomaka hou ʻo ia e hoʻopakele kālā no ka huakaʻi i St. A ua makemake ʻia kēia moemoeā lōʻihi loa i nā makahiki he ʻumi. Ua hele mai ʻo ia i ke kaona aliʻi nui o ke koa ʻo St. Petersburg. A, i ka ʻike ʻana i ke keʻena noiʻi kahi i waiho ʻia ai ka mōʻī i kali ʻia a kali lōʻihi i ka manawa, ua holo koke ʻo ia me nā mea ma nā halekele ākea me nā mea hoʻoili ʻekolu, no ke aha me nā mea hoʻohuli? ʻO ia wale nō e noho ana ʻo Moskvichka i loko o ka waihona ʻike, a ʻo Muscovites, ʻaʻole like me Pitertsev, aloha nui e hoʻouna i nā ala ʻē aʻe, e like me kēia manawa. Ua hōʻea ʻo ia i ʻelima mau hola ma hope o ka wahi lōʻihi i kapa ʻia ai, nānā ʻo ia a ʻike ʻole ʻia ka mea like ʻole, ua hoʻoholo ʻo ia e nīnau aku i nā luna kiaʻi e kokoke mai ana i nā limahana hana a ka poʻe lawaiʻa e hele nei e ʻoki i nā ʻōpio mai lākou:
«E kuʻu poʻe aloha,» kāhea ʻo ia iā lākou, pane mai kekahi o lākou a huli mai iā ia, «hiki iā ʻoe ke haʻi mai iaʻu i kahi i waiho ai ka pā kaua o Gogol?»
– A ma ʻaneʻi, – ua pōpoki ke limahana i kona poʻo, – ma kahi i aneʻi. – ke kuhikuhi ana i ka pā o ka wahine a me nā ofanarel: mai ka mākeke aia wale nā lua ma ka paia a me kahi stencil paʻa ʻole, ka nui o ka pā ʻaihue me ka ihu kanaka. Ua make koke ʻo Granny ma muli o kahi maʻi hōʻeha ʻeha. Ma kēia holo a hiki i ka hopena. Loaʻa nā mea maikaʻi a pau. I
Ua inu ʻo Ottila i kahi aniani a hele aku e hiamoe.
I loko o ka pouli i ka moe i hoʻonā ʻia ʻo ia a piʻi aʻe e ʻalo i ka ʻaoʻao o kāna wahine, ke ʻalā nei i ke kuʻi. ʻAʻoleʻo ia i neʻe. I ka wa i piʻi aku ai ʻo ia ma luna o kāna wahine a ma waena o ka pā pōhaku a me kāna wahine, pīhoihoi ia i ka ʻaliki a me ka makani mai nā lehelehe o ka hapalua nani. Lawe ʻo Ottila i ka nui o ka hanu o ka lewa a hāpai i kona umauma i luna, ʻoi iki ka nui ma mua o kona poʻo, hoʻokuʻi ʻia i kona poʻo ma ke kua o kāna poʻo a me ka hiamoe o kāna kāne. Ua kau ʻo ia i kona pepeiao ma lalo o ia a uhi ʻia nā pepeiao ma luna me kona puʻupuʻu luna. Ua nalo aku ka ʻoki ʻana, a hoʻopau ʻia e like me ke pēpē, i ka ʻoluʻolu a me ka hōʻoluʻolu.
I kakahiaka kakahiaka ala aʻe ʻo ia i luna o ka uluna. ʻAʻohe wahine. Hele ʻo ia a ʻauʻau, a holoi ʻo ia iā ia iho, ua aahu i nā lole piha. Hele akula ʻo ia i ka puka o ka puka i ka Malele, lawe aku i ke kāʻei, a… Ua wehe ka puka mai iā ia i kēia kūlana a kuahiʻe, i ka manawa ʻo ka ʻōkuhi ʻo ia i ka puka o ka puka, kaʻi ʻana iā Ottila i ka pā o ka ʻaoʻao o ke Kahiakauka, me he mea lā ʻaʻole ʻano hanohano. Ua lele akula ʻo ia a kāhea maila i loko o ka Wisa ʻo Mount. ʻO ka ʻōpū me nā umauma cushioned a hoʻolei i ka precinct i hope.
– He aha ʻoe? Izoldushka!? – Kono ua noi me ka pīhoihoi i ka lele a ma hope o kona hōʻeha ʻana i ke kua ma hope o kona poʻo, e uhai ana i ka papahele.
– Wehe i kou wāwae, holoi wau i laila. hamo ana ʻo ia a hoʻomau i ka papahele, kūlou i ke kua i lalo, i hope iā ia. Hele aʻela ka mākaʻi e pili ana i kāna hoki, holoi i kona mau wāwae, kahi ʻeke polū me nā pepeiao huaʻala, a komo i loko o ke keʻena. ʻO ka mea mua i hana ai, piʻi i luna i kahi noho, a laila hele aku i ke kelepona ma ka papaʻaina a huki iā ia i kona ʻaoʻao. Lawe aʻela ia i ke kelepona, ua noho ma ka ʻaoʻao o ka pākaukau a waiho ma kona pepeiao. Ua hoʻopiʻi ʻo ia i ke kelepona o kāna poʻo a kalulu ʻana i kona mau wāwae, kali, ke helu ʻana i nā ʻakaʻaka.
– Ullah! – lohe ʻia ma kēlā ʻaoʻao o ka uaia ma hope o ka leo kanalima.
– Kauhea ʻoe? Ke kāhea nei kēia iā Mr. General General Klop.
– Ahhhh… ʻo ʻoe nō ʻoe? – Ua huhū ʻia ʻo Comrade Marshall, – pehea ka mea i kahi wahi hou? ʻAʻole lōʻihi ʻoe i kāhea aku, ua hoʻomaka ʻoe e poina e wai lā… uh… um, hānai iā ʻoe.
– ʻAe, he aha ʻoe, ʻo Eximendius Janis oglu Snegiryov. ʻAʻole i kumu kumu e hoʻopilikia ai i kou poʻo o kou mauʻelemakule i hala ʻole.
– Baska, ke ʻōlelo mai nei ʻoe, he dwarf?
– Uh …, ʻaʻole, kala, haʻalele.
– ʻĀnō, e noʻonoʻo ʻoe ma hope, e pili ana i ke ʻano o nā poʻe o nā lālā a me nā mea nona nā ʻāpana. Aia, he aha kāu i loaʻa ai, kekahi mea nui?
– Ae!!!
– He aha kou ʻāʻī, ʻaʻole ka Lūkini ʻo Pygmy?
– E kala, ʻae.
– ʻĀnō, e kamaʻilio pū mākou e pili ana i nā palena o ke kani ʻana o ke kelepona ʻana i ke kelepona ʻana, i hāpai ʻia i ka heluhelu mua ʻana o ka ʻaha kūkā o Moscow a me Lūkini.. No laila, pehea ʻoe e Sneak Bug? A hele wikiwiki, hiki wau i ka hālāwai.
– Ua nānā ʻoe i ka pō nei i kahi aʻe e pili ana i ka Call Center?
– ʻAʻole, loaʻa iaʻu kahi DiViDishka. A ma?
– Ma St. Petersburg, ua ʻaihue ʻia kahi kolokolo i ka Nose.
– A he?
– Makemake wau e noiʻi i kēia hihia, inā e ʻae mai ʻoe iaʻu, e Mr. Mr. Marshall.
– He aha nā ihu ʻē aʻe, ʻaʻohe mea i hōʻike mai iaʻu, e ʻōlelo pololei loa aku. ʻO wai ka ʻaha i hōʻoki ʻia ai ko lākou ihu
– ʻAe, me Gogol..
– Ua hōʻoki ʻia ka ihu o Gogol?
– ʻAʻole,