In fact, Gabe hated sports. All he’d ever wanted was to create things, to build things. To use his brain. Being sent to his room in punishment had provided hours of solitude to do just that.
“I won’t force Daniel to be a replica of me,” he assured his tired brain. “He doesn’t have to like computers. If he wants to fish, I’ll fish. I can learn that stuff. The company’s okay, now. I’ve got all the money I’ll ever need. I owe it to myself to take some time off—to see if Blair and I can make a go of it.” He thought about Mac’s letter. Why had it arrived when it had? Was God giving him a second chance?
“I owe it to him to do better than my dad did for me.”
Which shouldn’t be hard, given the past.
You owe him love.
That word sent a shiver of worry through his brain. Love? Gabe didn’t think he had it in him. Not the kind of love the songs were about, the kind of love he’d read about in stories and poems. Certainly not the emotion that required you to give away everything you valued for the sake of someone else, the kind of love that made you vulnerable and weak, prey to others.
“He doesn’t need to see that part of me,” Gabe told himself. “He’ll never know about that. I’ll make sure of it.”
But as he lay in his hotel room thinking about a black-haired little boy and his too solemn mother, Gabe wondered how he’d keep that shriveled-up, scared part of himself locked away when he’d spent such a large part of his life wondering where the next con to get his money would come from.
“One day at a time,” he reminded himself. “With God’s help, I’ll face this one day at a time. That’s what Pastor Jake said on Sunday.”
Surely if you kept your eyes on the future, you couldn’t get caught up in the past?
“Daniel’s my only chance to make amends,” he whispered, eyes closed as he prayed for help. “At least if I mess up, and I probably will, I know that Blair will make sure my son gets all the love he needs. He won’t end up like me.”
Please, God, don’t let him end up all alone like me.
Chapter Three
I don’t understand how You could do this to me, God. Mac’s always loved me, I know he has. Why did he have to find Gabe, send him that letter, stir things up? Why couldn’t he have left well enough alone? Why did You let it happen?
Days later, and it was still a silly question! Blair knew the answer, at least the one Mac had given this morning when she’d asked.
“I’m old, honey. Some days I get tired and feeling down. I miss your gran, God rest her soul. Lots of times, all I want is to go to Heaven and rest, talk to God about things, give Myrtle a hug and kiss. But I couldn’t ever die peacefully if I thought you and Daniel weren’t cared for. It wouldn’t be right.”
“We’re fine, Grandpa. We’re managing really well now. I have the business and it’s growing, Willie’s doing better with those new pills and Albert hasn’t had anything to drink since a year ago at Christmas.”
Mac had snorted derisively. “Ha! You’re lying to yourself, Busy Bee. We’re scraping by and just barely doing that. What happens if the bees don’t produce their usual this year? Or if some of those orders get canceled? We’ll be in hot water then, and no mistake.” He’d patted the pocket that held his bankbook with smug satisfaction. “At least this way I can be sure you’ll have a nest egg to fall back on, and you’ve got the right to leave your hives in place for the next three years. He paid a lot for that land, you know.”
“He can afford it. And that’s a bunch of baloney, Grandfather! You’re as healthy as a horse! Selling that land to Gabe was just a way to manipulate him into finding out about Daniel, and you know it. I thought you loved us more than that.”
She fixed him with a stern look, but Mac didn’t back down.
“It’s because I love you two so much that I did it. You and Daniel need Gabe. And he needs a chance to be the boy’s father. He’s ready to move ahead with his life. Leaving the city and that company prove that. I think he’s changed.”
“You don’t know that, Mac. Gabe takes the company wherever he goes. And he doesn’t want to be a father, not at all. It’s just a duty thing.” She shut off the piercing memory of that moment, that one single second of pure joy when he’d looked, really looked at Daniel, fully acknowledged that the child was part of him. She’d hoped to argue her case more fully. But Mac had shrugged and walked away.
Reality intruded as Blair dipped another taper into the wax and watched while it drizzled off, knowing that she was spoiling its finish by waiting so long. But today, business just didn’t seem as important. She had to figure out what to do, decide how she was going to explain to Daniel that Gabe wouldn’t be his father. Not ever.
“After all, he’s had more than seven days to accept the idea. And he hasn’t called, hasn’t even spoken to Daniel. What kind of a father is that?”
No kind of father at all. Which was exactly why she’d never told Gabe about her son. He hadn’t wanted to be a father, that much she was clear on. If she’d doubted it then, watching him avoid the children she worked with in her spare time would have been enough. And there were his words over the phone that last awful morning. I’ll never be a father. The idea was repugnant to him!
The phone pealed a summons. “Hey, Blair!”
“Clarissa? How are you?” Blair grinned as she envisioned her formerly thin college buddy now hugely pregnant with the twins she’d been told to expect.
“I’m big, okay? Enough said.” Clarissa’s normally sweet voice halted, then continued. “I just read something I thought you might be interested in. Gabriel Sloan has handed over management of his company to a group of vice presidents.”
Blair gulped, then nodded. “He’s here, Pris. Mac sold him a piece of land, and he’s apparently going to build a house on it. Some kind of castle affair, if the rumors are true.”
Clarissa’s voice wavered quietly down the wire. “Does he know?”
“About Daniel? Yeah, he knows.”
Clarissa’s mutter of protest left no room for doubt. She was mad. “They don’t let women as big as me fly, Blair Delaney, but if you don’t spill the beans, I’ll sic Briony on you. And you know how inquisitive she is.”
Blair giggled at the reminder of their friend and former college roomie, the third in their group who had also been dumped by her sweetheart. Bri had a scientist’s mind. She liked the facts laid out clearly and concisely. She never accepted “no” for an answer.
“Nice try, Pris. But you can’t. Bri’s off somewhere in the Canadian Rockies doing the last bit of research for her thesis.” Blair unplugged the kettle and poured herself a cup of hot water, dipping the lemon mint tea bag in and out rhythmically for several moments.
“I see.”
Blair waited, a tiny smile nudging the corner of her lips. Clarissa didn’t disappoint her.
“Wade? I’ll need the van. I’m going on a little trip to see an old college buddy who’s trying to hold something back.”
“No, you are not traveling, Clarissa Featherhawk! You’re staying right there.” A mutter of threats rumbled across the line. “All right, already! Gabriel Sloan arrived a few days ago. He’s staying in the hotel in Teal’s Crossing and he’s tearing up my land as we speak. That’s all I know.”
“Is he still as good looking?”
Blair closed her eyes, took a deep breath and admitted the truth. “Yes.” She let her