‘Get it back? What happened to it?’
‘Marcel was having money problems at the time, and Amos thought it might make him turn to me. Instead I loaned it to Cassie, so that she could buy into Marcel’s property in Paris and then confront him on equal terms. It helped clear the air between them and they ended up married. Amos was livid.’
Jackson gave a crack of laughter. ‘He gave you that money so that you would marry Marcel and you actually used it to help Marcel marry Cassie? I’ve heard of courage, but that beats all. Dad must be pretty annoyed with you, and yet he still wants you in the family.’
‘I think he puts it down to a woman’s foolishness. He reckons that if I’m his daughter-in-law he can instruct me in better ways.’ She chuckled. ‘Or perhaps he thinks if he can make me your wife that’ll be a way of punishing me. He’s probably thinking, Then she’ll find out what a monster Jackson really is. That’ll teach her.’
‘Then he’s miscalculated,’ Jackson said cheerfully. ‘You already know what a monster I am.’
‘I’ll bet there’s a lot still to find out.’
‘I’ll leave you guessing about that.’
‘Anyway, are you saying you didn’t know about me lending the money to Cassie? Amos never told anyone?’
‘Tell people that you made a fool of him? Can you imagine him doing that?’
‘No, you’re right. But there’s more. It was a good investment. The hotel’s doing well and Cassie has now started repaying me with interest.’
He stared. ‘So she’s the ghost?’ he whispered, scarcely able to speak.
‘Yes, I hadn’t expected to get anything back so soon, but some of the money has gone into my bank already and there’s more on the way. I’m going to be a rich woman.’
He pulled himself together.
‘Aha! So now you’re letting me know that if I need a rich wife you’re available?’
‘Letting you know that I don’t need a husband, and that one word out of place will make me take terrible revenge.’
He grinned. ‘Nice to get that clear. Except that I already knew.’
‘Well, we’ve always agreed that we drive each other mad.’
‘And as long as it’s mutual what does it matter? Have another drink.’
He spoke lightly to hide the storm inside. So she hadn’t found another man. Just a simple misunderstanding, but it had disturbed him to an extent he didn’t want to think about. The implications were too troublesome.
He drained his glass, trying to summon up the courage to say what was on his mind. At last he managed it. ‘As you said, not all ghosts are evil. But some of them are. One that still haunts me, and always will, is knowing that I did you harm.’
‘Jackson, stop it. We talked about this the other morning in the hotel garden. I told you that there was nothing to forgive and we agreed to put it behind us as though it had never happened.’
‘But it did happen. Nothing can make it unhappen. The effect will be with you all your life. And now I’m going to say something that will make you hate me again. I’m glad you didn’t marry Dan. I’m not glad of the way it happened, but it’s best that you didn’t marry him. You wouldn’t have been happy. There—now you can call me all the names you like.’
As he spoke he gave her a quizzical look.
‘I think I may pass that chance up,’ she said. ‘I know it wasn’t your fault that Dan backed off. He was just looking for an excuse and he seized it. That wasn’t what I minded most—’
‘I know. It was me not telling you everything about how it happened and why he proposed in the first place. But I swear to you, Freya, I was only thinking of you. You were so hurt I couldn’t bear to hurt you even more. I never thought of you finding out some other way. You thought I was laughing up my sleeve at you, but I wasn’t.’
‘I know. I feel I know you better now, and you wouldn’t do that. I shouldn’t have flown at you, but suddenly everything seemed to get on top of me.’
Her voice faded and against her will she closed her eyes.
‘Freya,’ he said anxiously. ‘You’re not coping well, are you? Even all these weeks later you haven’t really begun to get over it.’
‘Of course I have,’ she said with a bright air that didn’t fool him. ‘I’m managing just fine. It’s like it never happened. Dan isn’t worth bothering about.’
She was lying, he thought, and not just to him but, more seriously, to herself. Dan had hurt her more than she could bear, and she denied it as the only way of coping.
He thought of their meeting in the garden, when she had seemed the strong one, offering him comfort. Now he realised that he’d believed too easily. She seemed in control but she was struggling for that strength and the fight was exhausting her.
Bitterly, he blamed himself again. Would she ever be free of that pain? Would he ever be free of his guilt?
‘It’s not just Dan,’ he said. ‘It’s what I did too. You’re still hurting inside but you won’t admit it. You think you can hide it from the world. Well, maybe you can with others, but not from me.’
He waited for her to insist that she was all right, as she so often did, but this time her shoulders sagged.
‘Tell me,’ he said.
‘Oh, it’s just—’ She sighed. ‘That idiot Tommy. I wish he hadn’t managed to kiss me—even that brief little kiss. Oh, yes, you kissed me once, soon after it happened—’
‘And I got it wrong again,’ he remembered. ‘You thought I was taking advantage.’
‘I was off my head. You were being kind. I didn’t mean what I said.’
‘Don’t brood about Tommy, Freya. He doesn’t count. I don’t count. One day you’ll meet a guy who knocks you for six. You’ll want him, he’ll want you, and you’ll be so happy you’ll forget Dan ever existed.’
‘Oh, no! That’s not what I’m planning.’
‘Does life happen the way we plan?’
‘It does if you’ve got money. I told you—I’m a prosperous woman now. I’m going to become a business tycoon, investing Amos’s money where it’ll make the most profit. And I won’t care about anything else.’
He had a shocking vision of the cold, unfeeling creature she seemed to want to become.
‘Stop it, Freya. That’s not you talking’
‘Really? Then who is it?’
‘Someone else that you think you are—that maybe you want to be. But it won’t make you happy. You’d need to be heartless, and you’re not.’
‘You don’t know what I’m like. Even I don’t know what I’m really like. But I’m going to enjoy finding out. Maybe I’ll get Amos to give me some investment advice. He’s always wanted me to be his daughter. I’ll never be his daughter by marriage, but I can please him another way.’
‘By being his daughter of the heart, you mean?’ Jackson asked wryly.
‘His daughter of the brain. That’s the bit that counts. Neither he nor I has much of a heart.’
‘Stop it!’ he said fiercely. ‘Don’t talk like that. Don’t even think like that. Don’t you realise it’ll never make you happy?’
‘And what will make me happy? Another man? I don’t think so. It’s best to go my own way, keep my fate in my own hands. From now on my life is