She paused for a moment to listen to a noisy dispute in the taproom, then went out into the yard. It was a cold crisp morning, but the sun was shining and she felt better away from the stale odours of the inn.
Was her life to be spent in inns or lodgings that could be no better than this, because she could not afford a higher rent? Was she making a terrible mistake? Perhaps she’d let a few careless words upset her too much. Did she really need to run away to France?
Was she such a spineless coward? Remembering the brave governess who was forced to stand on her own feet, Madeline was shamed. She would truly be a coward if she allowed Rochdale to ruin her life.
Suddenly, she found that she was no longer afraid. The marquis might try to ruin her, but what did it truly matter? She did not care what people thought of her—but she would not have Hal ruined. Her mind sought for a solution to her problems and the idea came to her slowly. She need not go to France; instead she would return to her late husband’s house in London, but she could not return to Ravenscar for she did not wish to bring shame on Jenny and Adam. She would discover the truth of her situation from the lawyers and, if she were the heir, she would arrange for the marquis to be paid. Then, if she had no other choice, she would go home to her father. Sally would no longer feel it necessary to remain with her and could follow her heart. As for Hal...perhaps in time he would forgive her, though it would be best if he forgot her and found a new life without her.
Madeline was not sure what might happen to her in the future, if she could bear to marry again, whether she would be penniless or left with a competence. She only knew that she must find the courage to face whatever came to her by returning to her old life.
It was the best solution for her friends and preferable to a life spent looking over her shoulder. She must stop running and face her enemy.
Lifting her head proudly, Madeline walked back to the inn. It was time she took charge of her own life—but as the lady she was rather than a seamstress. If Rochdale required to be paid, he must produce evidence and the lawyers would attend to it. Surely enough would be left from her husband’s estate to enable her to live independently, but if not she would seek help from her family.
* * *
‘Oh, I am glad you have given up the idea of becoming a seamstress, my lady,’ Sally said when Madeline returned to their room. ‘I would have come with you wherever you chose to go, but I must confess that Thomas was not truly happy about it, though for my sake he would follow you anywhere.’
‘Once I am settled, you must make your own plans for the future,’ Madeline told her. ‘I want my friends to be happy and I shall make you both a handsome present when you leave me.’
‘We do not need anything, my lady,’ Sally said. ‘Thomas has money enough to set up his inn—but I shall not leave you until you are comfortable.’
‘Your loyalty has been more than I could ever have expected,’ Madeline said. ‘If you will accept nothing more, I shall give you a wedding gift.’
‘I could not refuse that,’ Sally said, looking pleased. ‘Will you not have some breakfast? There are fresh rolls, butter and honey and I could send down for more tea, for I think this must have gone cold.’
‘I shall have honey and rolls and the fruit juice you brought,’ Madeline said. ‘Pray tell Thomas the news and ask him to engage us a chaise for London rather than Dover.’
‘Yes, my lady, at once.’
Sally went off with a new spring in her step, unable to hide her pleasure at Madeline’s change of plan. It was a sensible one and Madeline wondered why she had not thought of it at once. Until the lawyers had sorted out the business of the estate, Lethbridge’s property was at her disposal. It was likely that she would have some claim to the dower house at his country estate if nothing more...but there was little point in thinking too far ahead. Another day of travelling would bring them to London and the lawyers would soon give her the information she needed.
She felt better for having taken her life into her own hands. Rochdale would do his worst for the only person’s reputation to suffer would be her own and she cared nothing for it. Her friends would not bear the shame of her making—and Sally’s happiness was worth whatever it cost her. In London, Madeline would make plans for the future according to her situation.
* * *
She had finished her breakfast and was ready to go down when Sally returned to fetch the bags and tell her that the chaise was ready and waiting. Madeline carried her own bag, as she had when they arrived here. She did not intend to let her maid wait on her as she had in the old days. In future her life would be different for she would live more simply and not as the wife of a lord. Wherever she went and whatever she did, she had changed. For years she’d lived in fear of her husband and then the shadow of the marquis’s threats had overwhelmed her, but something had changed. She would not run away again, but face whatever the future brought with fresh courage.
As she left the inn, she saw that Thomas was speaking with the gentleman she’d seen in the inn the previous night. He saw her, shook hands with Captain Mardle and came to take her bags from her.
‘I hope you will not dislike it, my lady,’ Thomas said, ‘but Captain Mardle is riding to London and asked if you would care for his escort. I said that I thought you could not object... There have been tales of highwaymen on the Heath as you approach London. Two pistols are better than one.’
‘I have no objection to the gentleman’s company,’ Madeline said. ‘It was kind of him to offer—please thank him for me.’
‘Yes, my lady. I was sure you could not object for he is a respectable gentleman.’
Madeline smiled and nodded toward the obliging gentleman and he swept off his hat to her. Thomas helped her into the chaise and the order to move off was given. Thomas and Captain Mardle followed, riding together. She looked at Sally as she settled back against the squabs.
‘Was Thomas pleased?’
‘Oh, yes, my lady. He says he shall buy his inn in London for his brother knows of one by the river and no more than five miles from his own. It is exactly what Thomas wanted, though he would have changed his plans to please me.’
‘Well, now you may please yourselves,’ Madeline said. ‘We must have a pretty gown made for your wedding and I shall think of something nice to give you.’
‘I should like something in ivory, I think,’ Sally said ‘and a velvet bonnet trimmed with silk roses to wear with it.’
‘Oh, yes, that would be charming,’ Madeline said. ‘We shall go shopping together, Sally. You must let me buy your bride clothes for I owe you so much.’
Sally blushed and demurred, but did not refuse and they spent some happy minutes speaking of various things that a young bride needed when she married. Thomas had not spoken of taking his bride on a wedding trip and it was unlikely that she would need many smart gowns, but simple dresses for everyday, underclothes and linens for her home were essential.
Madeline was determined to make her a present of cloth and linen that she would find useful in her married life and also to give her various bits and pieces for her house, beside the coin she’d already decided on. It was wonderful to have a wedding to plan and Madeline managed to put all thought of the marquis from her mind.
Now and then thoughts of Hal made her heart ache, for she ought to have been planning her own wedding soon, but she must be brave. Her letter had made her feelings clear and she doubted that Hal would pursue her. He would be hurt, but he would realise that their parting was for the best...although Madeline was no longer sure that it was. But he would receive her letter and then he would despise her for being a coward.
* * *
Hal cursed as he ran his hand over the horse’s left hind leg. It had gone lame and there was no way he could push on further now. He must lead the poor beast to the nearest inn and leave the chaise