If you feel that you are particularly prone to unnecessary stress reactions, the next two chapters should help you pinpoint the reasons for this.
SUMMARY
Stress is evoked by our need to re-establish an equilibrium when changes occur.
Small amounts of stress are necessary and beneficial.
The three stress stages are alarm, resistance and exhaustion.
Certain personality types are more prone to stress than others.
Prolonged stress can lead to illness or mental breakdown.
The body reacts to stress by mobilizing physical responses to help us cope better with situations which we perceive as threatening.
Even our thoughts can create a physical stress response.
We perceive changes and stressors in our own unique ways. Depending on our background, upbringing and present circumstances, we may find ourselves coping with stress much better than our neighbour or colleague at work. Some of us are born with greater resilience than others, enabling us to stay calm longer than the next person when the going gets tough.
Apart from resilience and adaptability to change, we also bring with us particular dispositions when we are born. Anyone who has children or who is close to a family with small children will be able to confirm how different they are right from the start. One baby is placid and sleeps through the night very early on, whereas another baby will be more wakeful and excitable. One child plays happily on his own, whereas another one has to be entertained a lot to be content. These individual predispositions, together with the manner in which parents bring up their children, will result in various personality types – some of which are particularly vulnerable to stress.
THE ANXIOUS TYPE
This personality type will be lacking somewhat in self-confidence, unsure of his or her abilities even if others try to be reassuring. Anxious people are reluctant to express any negative emotions openly and are often incapable of saying ‘no’ if someone makes unreasonable demands on them. This unwillingness and fear to stand up for themselves comes either from a distorted sense of duty (something that has usually been drummed into them during childhoood) or from the mistaken belief that they will make themselves unpopular if they do not comply with other people’s wishes. Even though anxious people appear to be conformist, they often harbour strong resentments against those whose wishes they seem to carry out so willingly.
STRESS PROBLEMS
Anxious people tend to go for undemanding jobs, which can easily lead them to becoming frustrated and bored. If they progress to a more responsible job they tend to feel easily hassled when the workload increases and will often take their unease out on others.
THE PERFECTIONIST
Perfectionists like everything to be in its proper place and done at the proper time. Routine is of great importance, as is detail. Mistakes are not tolerated – they will even rewrite a handwritten, informal message if their pen slips or a word has been misspelled. This rather plodding way of dealing with life works out well as long as the job in hand is stable and predictable. Perfectionists are usually hard-working and reliable, but not equipped to deal with sudden emergencies or change.
STRESS PROBLEMS
Their great problems adapting to change, and their unwillingness to give up established routines, can cause stress for perfectionists if they find themselves distracted from their routines. Their diligent attention to detail means that they are creating stress for themselves when better prioritization and a more even-handed approach to less important tasks could easily save the day.
THE STIMULUS-SEEKER
This personality type strives on risk and is often addicted to the rush of adrenalin which accompanies any venture. Stimulus-seekers have a certain dare-devil attitude and can be quite brilliant at what they are doing, be it in sports or in the business world. However, they have a very limited attention span. Once the thrill is over, they move on to the next project. They are often not concerned with details and leave others to do the menial parts of a job while they attend to the Trig picture’. Stimulus-seekers will typically choose professions where risk-taking promises to yield great amounts of money and/or esteem.
STRESS PROBLEMS
Stimulus-seekers experience the risks of their ventures as beneficial stress, and thrive on it. Their minds race with possibilities rather than worries, and as a consequence they tend to smoke and drink too much. Substance abuse and its negative side-effects are more common in stimulus-seekers than are mental and/or physical illness.
THE AMBITIOUS TYPE (A-TYPE)
A-type personalities tend to be hard-driven and aggressive, channelling all their energies into their work. A-types have little or no time for a social life or hobbies; they live, think and dream ‘work’. They have problems delegating and are highly critical of themselves and others, often becoming impatient and angry when things do not run smoothly. They find it impossible to sit down quietly and do nothing; they are constantly moving, jiggling their knees and tapping their fingers – in times of stress they tend to do several things at the same time. They also find it hard to concentrate fully on conversations because they are already racing ahead in their mind, thinking about the next thing they want to do.
The A-type personality is the stress category that has been most widely studied. This type is found not just in high-level jobs, but all the way through the various strata of society.
STRESS PROBLEMS
In their efforts to control everything and everyone around them, A-types exert themselves physically and mentally. They are unable to recognize when they have reached their limit and will typically suffer from high blood-pressure. A-types are prone to coronary heart disease, ulcers and atherosclerosis (hardening of the arteries).
All stress-prone types of personality are driven by one thing: fear. The anxious person is afraid to be unpopular and to be considered unhelpful; the perfectionist is afraid of being ‘only human’; the stimulus-seeker