“Perfect. Let’s meet back here next week, and if anyone needs any pointers or one-on-one coaching, I’m available.”
The group left, and she walked to her office at the back of the ski rental office aware of the fact that she was a total fraud. She wondered how she was going to get over this. How was she going to make herself ski when it was the last thing she thought she could do?
Right now, sitting in her office, looking up at the mountain, she felt dread and fear. She should just confess and stop trying to be something she used to be.
“Knock, knock,” Carter said from the doorway. “Got a minute?”
Definitely. Her breath hitched as their eyes met and held. She’d rather spar with him than dwell on her own inadequacies. “Sure. Come to tell me that your team isn’t up to snuff? Mine is great.”
“Ha. Mine is pretty good, too. Elizabeth can really ski, and I was surprised that Georgina could, as well. Don’t tell either of them. It’s just that they never talked about skiing.”
“I know what you mean. I’ve got two snowboarders and I’m not really sure how to handle them. But they are pretty good. Not you good, of course, but still, they’ve got some skills.”
“It’s hard to be as good as me,” he said with that big sexy grin of his.
A shiver of awareness skittered down her spine as she gazed into his blue-gray eyes. It had been days since she’d been alone with him, and instead it felt like years. Everything about him turned her on. His disheveled hair, his baggy snowboarding pants, the spicy scent of his aftershave. New Year’s Eve had whetted her appetite, and she wanted more of Carter Shaw. And right now flirting and playing with him felt safe.
* * *
CARTER FOUND IT harder and harder to keep up the casual pretense he’d cultivated around Lindsey. He missed her. He physically ached for her and wanted to do whatever he could to get her back into his bed, but she was setting the limits, and right now that meant taking it slow.
Sitting in the small office and smiling when what he really wanted to do was to pull her into his arms, run his fingers through her long, silky blond hair and kiss her until she was panting. But that wasn’t going to happen. He was pursuing her but didn’t want her to know it. He needed to keep up appearances. And that was exactly what he intended to do.
“It is hard to be as big as your ego,” she said glibly. “I wish I had a tenth of it.”
“What do you need it for?”
“I have to ski at our event in the middle of February, Carter. I haven’t done anything but slide down a mound of snow since I crashed last year in Sochi. What am I going to do?” she asked.
Looking as though she had the weight of the world on her shoulders, she walked around her desk and sat on the edge of it, right in front of him. He saw a hint of vulnerability in her eyes. She needed him. It felt good. Stroked his ego. And she’d probably never let him live it down if he let her know.
“Take a run with me.”
“I don’t even know if I can. You saw me on the snow pile. I was shaking like an idiot up there. If I was on skis—”
“I’ve got an idea,” he said.
“I doubt it would work.”
“My last one did,” he said, bragging just a little, but also making a challenge out of it. He knew how she was. She’d rise to the challenge.
Lindsey sighed impatiently. “Fine. What’s your idea?”
“Just a ride down the mountain in a toboggan.”
“I don’t know.”
“I’ll be with you,” he said gently. “You know, like I was at the snow mound.”
She watched him with wary eyes, and he ached that she had lost her faith in herself. He vowed he’d do whatever he had to do to help her get it back.
“Would we go here at the lodge?” she asked.
“Yes. We could even say we are checking it out for an event for our nonskiers. I’ve got two of them.”
“I didn’t get one. Maybe we can swap one of my snowboarders for your nonskier. It’s always weird to me when people live and work this near the Wasatch Range and they don’t ski.”
“Me, too,” he admitted. “I can see it in Cali because there are so many other sports that people can do, but here? It’s pretty much ski or snowboard. Or, at the very least, ice skate. Speaking of which...you ever try that?”
She shook her head. “I’m not that good at it. Plus, my coach used to like me to focus on my sport.”
“Good idea. My coach said something similar but I did it anyway.”
“Rebel.”
“You know it,” he said.
Lindsey bit her lip, then turned to stare out the window before finally looking back over at him. “I wish I had your courage.”
“You do have it. But in your own way. You are a rebel when you need to be. I’ve seen you when you pass through the gates for the downhill. You look very fierce.”
He had never mentioned it, but the first time he’d noticed Lindsey was after her run. She’d broken the world-record time. He’d been so turned on by her he hadn’t known what to do. She hadn’t been his kind of woman, but then suddenly his body had been, like, hell yeah, she is.
“Thank you, Carter. You know, for an egomaniac, you say some really nice things,” she said, tipping her head to the side to study him.
“I’m not as ego driven as you think I am.”
“Really? You’re not going to convince me.” She checked her watch. “But I can probably take off in about an hour if you want to try the tobogganing idea.”
“Great.” He was shameless where she was concerned, using her love of skiing and her need to be back on her skis as a way to keep him by her side. He wondered if she would still be talking to him after their night together if it wasn’t for the fact that she couldn’t get back on her skis.
It was humbling, and he didn’t like the way it made him feel, so he treated those feelings the way he usually did. He shoved them so far down he could pretend they didn’t exist.
“I’ll go to the concierge and make sure we can get on there and then come back in an hour,” he said. It would probably be a good idea to give her some space so she could miss him.
“Okay. Thanks, Carter,” she said.
“For?”
“Just being a friend.”
Friend. Ugh. He wasn’t about to let her relegate him there. Glancing over his shoulder to make sure no one was nearby, he closed the gap between them and pulled her into his arms. Then he gave her a hot, hard kiss. “We’re more than friends, gorgeous, and don’t you forget it.”
He strode out of her office without looking back, mainly because he didn’t want to seem as if he wanted to know how that kiss had affected her when it had shaken him to his core.
Carter knew he was playing a dangerous game with her. That he wanted something from her that she might give him, but he was trying to keep her from even knowing he wanted. He shook his head and thought of what a sap he was. He wanted to be more than friends and more than lovers, but had never in his life been successful at making any kind of relationship work.
Even his coaches had been short-term before they’d thrown their hands up and walked away. He just wasn’t good at making things last. Usually that didn’t bother him, but the thought of being short-term in Lindsey’s life simply