The Prodigal Son Returns. Jan Drexler

he was, he wouldn’t have any problems finding one. He was no Levi Zook.

      But it for sure wasn’t going to be her. No man was going to take her Daniel’s place.

      Chapter Six

      “It was a robin. I know it was,” said Susan. She nodded to emphasize her certainty.

      “It wasn’t a robin—it was a blackbird.” Johnny’s retort was tinged with disdain.

      “He had red on him.”

      “It was a red-winged blackbird. Robins have red breasts, not red shoulders.”

      Ellie touched Johnny’s knee to quiet him before the argument gained strength. She should reprimand them, but on Sunday mornings she just wanted quiet.

      The buggy swayed in rhythm to Brownie’s trotting hooves. It wasn’t as crowded now that Reuben was old enough for his own buggy. Dat had agreed he could drive it to Welcome Yoder’s for church, and now the two boys were ahead of them on the road, Reuben driving at the same sedate pace. Soon he’d be courting, if he wasn’t already, and next Benjamin. At least Mandy and Rebecca were still at home.

      Ellie listened to her sisters’ chatter. She had been the same way with Sally and Lovina once, their three heads together, sharing their secrets, their dreams. Mandy and Rebecca would have the same sweet girlhood memories.

      “There’s another robin!”

      Johnny looked where Susan pointed. “Ne, that one’s a blue jay. See how big he is? And his blue feathers?”

      Susan didn’t argue, but kept her eyes on the side of the road.

      Ellie’s thoughts went back to Mandy and Rebecca. She’d had that same anticipation when she was their age. Riding to church was an adventure, with Lovina giggling about the boys they would see and Sally bouncing with anticipation of seeing her best friend again. She had looked forward to the singing, even the long sermons, and the fellowship. What had changed?

      She never had the urge to kick against the restraints of the church that some people talked about. The Ordnung was safe. It provided security against the changing world. Even when her friends tried living outside the protective fence of the Ordnung during their Rumspringa, Ellie never saw the lure. She knew where she belonged.

      Bram Lapp had left the community once.... What would it be like to leave her loved ones behind, to take the children somewhere and start fresh where no one knew her? The thought pressed against her heart, stopping her breath. It would be like dying. Ne, she could never leave her home, her family.

      Dat turned south at the corner, and Ellie closed her eyes against the morning sun hitting her face.

      She must work through this emptiness somehow. Church for her meant nothing more than a long day with a headache. The children needed tending, and every week it was harder to keep them still during the meeting. The hymns were so long, the prayers drawn out. There had been a time when the singing was her favorite part of a Sunday. Now she just waited for it to be over.

      “Is that one a robin?”

      “Ja, see his red breast?”

      Ellie gave herself a mental shake. Her children needed her. A pasted-on smile was better than none, and a kind word to a friend could help lift her spirits. But how many more church Sundays were going to pass before the smile became genuine again?

      Dat turned the buggy into the driveway of the Yoders’ farm, joining a line of other buggies. When they approached the sidewalk leading to the house, Ellie saw the buggy in front of Reuben’s stop. Matthew Beachey jumped down, then reached back to help Annie. He walked with her to the lines of people waiting to go into the house while their buggy drove on.