A steel band twisted in his gut. What kind of hero could he be to a little girl?
He found Matthew’s tack hammer hanging on the wall. A sharp rap sealed the first rivet. He shifted to the second rivet but stopped.
If Ellie looked at him the way Susan did, what would he do then?
His world tilted for a brief moment, then righted. He gave his head a shake and then drove the hammer home on the second rivet.
Focus. Play the part. Lie low under his cover until his job was done, then maybe he could...what? Court her?
Forget her. That was what he needed to do. God help him if he let himself fall for the woman.
* * *
Ellie took a deep breath as she laid her hand on the knob of the Beacheys’ back door, listening to the
women’s voices on the other side. Facing Bram Lapp would be easier than stepping through this door.
“Ellie, you can do this.”
Ellie turned to see Mam’s eyes filled with understanding. The soft words gave her strength.
The crowd of chatting women parted to welcome them as the door opened. Susan clung to Ellie’s skirts as they stepped in. Ellie wished she had somewhere to hide, but it was too late. Mam had already set her pies on the table and was greeting her friends.
Annie Beachey came over to Ellie as she lingered just inside the door.
“Ellie, I’m so glad you could come!”
Ellie smiled in spite of her churning stomach. Who could resist Annie’s contagious happiness? Although how she could be so merry when she must be uncomfortable with the growing baby most of the time was beyond her.
Annie took her bonnet to the back bedroom, and Ellie stepped farther into the kitchen. Sally, her younger sister, came over and took Danny from her arms.
“I’ve missed this little man.”
Sally’s easy confidence was just the balm Ellie’s nerves needed. This might be a fun outing after all.
“Well, if you hadn’t married last fall, you could have been cuddling him all winter.”
Sally looked up from nuzzling Danny’s neck. “Ach, sister. Then I wouldn’t be looking forward to my own boppli, would I?” Sally turned to Susan. “The other children are playing out in the yard with Dorothy Ann.”
“She’ll join them soon, I’m sure.” Ellie patted Susan’s back, knowing these few minutes of shyness would soon be over.
Sally leaned closer to Ellie, lowering her voice. “I saw the way Levi Zook kept watching you a week ago at Meeting. I think he’s still sweet on you.”
Ellie’s face grew warm with embarrassment. Did everyone know about his attentions to her? “I’ve told Levi we’re not suited for each other. I don’t know why he’s so persistent.”
“I do,” said Lovina as she joined Sally and Ellie. “I heard his sister from Middlebury wants him to send his younger girls to live with her, and he’s desperate to find a new wife so he can keep his family together.”
“Ja, well, I can understand why he wants a new wife, but it’s not going to be me.” Ellie turned to greet Lovina with a smile. “We’ll be sewing for your little one next.” She nodded at Lovina’s expanding waist.
As Sally and Lovina started chatting about morning-sickness remedies, Ellie stepped back, feeling the wall that had risen between them. She and her sisters had been inseparable as girls, and her marriage hadn’t lessened that close bond. Not until the past couple years.
Now that she was a widow, and they had their husbands... She crossed her arms in front of her, hiding her slim form. She could have been expecting another baby, too, if—well, if things had been different.
Ne, she had to stop thinking this way. Things were what they were, and it was Gott’s will. A faithful, obedient woman accepted Gott’s will, didn’t she?
And if it was Gott’s will that she accept Levi Zook as her new husband? Ellie suppressed a shudder. She still believed two people should love each other if they married, and as kind and faithful as Levi was, she didn’t love him.
Ellie followed some of the other women as they moved toward the front room of the house, where Annie had arranged things for the frolic. A table was set up for cutting material, with several lengths of muslin and flannel ready to be cut into the pieces they would sew into gowns and diapers for the new baby. The room was arranged with chairs in a circle for sewing and visiting. Before long, the four women who had taken the job of cutting the material had pieces ready for sewing, and the rest of the women settled in with their needles and thread.
When Susan went off with the other children, Ellie chose a chair near her sisters, where Danny was still happy on Sally’s lap. Taking the next available diaper, one of many they would be making today, she started in on the simple hem. Over the hum of conversation, she heard Bram’s name mentioned.
“What did you say his name is?” Minnie Garber asked Annie.
“Bram—short for Abram. He’s my brother who is staying with us for a time.”
What did Annie think of her Englisch brother? Ellie hated the thought of one of her brothers jumping the fence, leaving their family and their ways behind. How would she treat them if they had left and then wanted to return?
“I didn’t know you had another brother,” Minnie went on. That woman was never shy when it came to gossip.
“Bram has been gone for quite a few years—”
“Gone?” Minnie interrupted. The rest of the room quieted as the other women listened to their conversation.
“Ja.” Annie stopped and looked around the room of women waiting to hear what she had to say. “He left home twelve years ago but came back recently. He just bought a farm and will be settling here.”
“Twelve years?” Minnie’s voice was incredulous. “Where was he all that time? Did he live in Ohio? Pennsylvania?”
“Um, ne.”
Ellie’s heart went out to Annie. It was obvious that she wasn’t interested in gossiping about her brother.
“He was in Chicago,” Annie finally said. Her words were met with silence.
“Chicago?” Minnie sounded stunned.
“Ja, but he’s home now and wants to be part of our community.” Annie looked from one face to another. Most of the women stared at the sewing in their hands, but Mam smiled at Annie, encouraging her.
Then Minnie voiced what Ellie had been thinking.
“Won’t he have trouble giving up his Englisch ways after all this time?”
“He’s shedding himself of them as quickly as he can.” Annie sounded relieved, as if she was happy to give Minnie an acceptable answer. “When I finished his new clothes yesterday, he wouldn’t rest until he had put them on.”
“And you say he bought a farm?”
“Ja, the Jackson place on Emma Road. He spent all Tuesday afternoon and yesterday tearing out the telephone lines. He’s planning to move there next week.”
One of Minnie’s daughters joined in the conversation from the other side of the circle.
“So all he needs now is a buggy and a wife!”
Good-natured laughter followed her comment, and the conversation shifted to the coming wedding of Minnie’s third daughter. Ellie concentrated on finishing the hem on the diaper, letting the conversation flow around her.
Bram was turning the Jackson place into an Amish farm? Could she have been so wrong about him? From what Annie said, he did mean to give up all