‘It’s what’s best for Izzy that matters, not your feelings or mine. She’s the important one in all of this, the one who stands to get hurt if you refuse to see sense.’ There was a definite bite in his voice now. It was galling to realise that he’d been upset by what she’d said. He’d always believed that he was inured against other people’s opinions, but Lucy’s opinion of him seemed to matter an awful lot.
‘It’s Izzy I’m thinking about,’ she retorted, bending down to strap the baby into the car seat and obviously forgetting that she still had hold of the umbrella.
Connor sighed when a shower of rainwater cascaded over him. ‘Why don’t you give me that before you do some real damage with it? Even you can’t manage to hold an umbrella and strap a baby into that seat.’
Her brown eyes flashed as he took the umbrella out of her hand but she must have decided it was easier not to argue with him. Connor held the umbrella so that it shielded her from the rain while she strapped Izzy into the seat. He handed it back to her once she’d finished, one dark brow arching when she grudgingly thanked him.
‘See? It wasn’t that difficult to do what I suggested, was it?’
‘Meaning that I should always follow your suggestions? I don’t think so.’
She opened the driver’s door but he put out his hand as she went to get into the car. ‘Why not, if they make sense? Or are you so determined to pay me back for wanting to get to know my own child that you’d do anything to spite me?’
‘I don’t give a damn about you, Connor! I’m not interested in paying you back or being spiteful. The only person I care about is Izzy and I won’t have you breaking her heart!’
‘Breaking her heart?’ he repeated, knowing that he must sound as shocked as he felt. He gripped hold of the door when she tried to wrench it out of his grasp. ‘You’re not going anywhere until you explain what you meant by that. Why on earth would I want to break my own daughter’s heart?’
‘Because it’s what will happen if she gets in the way of your precious career. Oh, you might think that you want to play the doting father at the moment, but what’s going to happen in a few months’ time when you realise that having a child means having a lot of extra responsibilities? Which will come first then, Connor—your career or your daughter?’
‘That’s ridiculous,’ he protested, but she didn’t allow him to finish.
‘No, it’s the truth. Everything you do is geared to one thing and one thing only: your career. You don’t have time for anything else, so do you really think it’s fair to upset Izzy’s life on a whim?’
‘It isn’t a whim! And I have no intention of upsetting her life. I plan on being a proper father to her and nothing you can say will make me change my mind about that.’
He glanced round as a car further along the row started up. There were a lot of staff leaving at the end of their shifts and he realised they couldn’t continue the discussion when they might be overheard. He had no intention of trying to hide the fact that he was Izzy’s father, but they needed to sort this out in private, although any hopes he’d had of reaching an agreement with Lucy were rapidly disappearing.
‘We need to talk about this and we can’t do it here,’ he said bluntly, trying not to think about what had led her to have such a low opinion of him. He’d always prided himself on his honesty and had never made any secret of the fact that he hadn’t been looking for commitment so why was she behaving as though he’d let her down?
He hurried on because he didn’t know how to deal with all these new and strange emotions that kept assailing him. ‘What time does Izzy go to bed?’
‘I don’t have time to talk to you tonight or any other night, for that matter,’ she declared, but he was in no mood to placate her.
‘Then I suggest you make time, because I’m not prepared to wait until you decide that you do feel like talking to me.’ He stared back at her, feeling his heart ache when he saw the fear that flickered in her soft brown eyes.
‘She usually goes to bed at seven. Leave it until after then so you don’t upset her routine.’
‘Let’s make it seven-thirty,’ he said gruffly, feeling like a heel for scaring her. ‘Are you still living in the same place?’
‘No. I moved out of there before Izzy was born.’
She told him her new address then got into the car. Connor didn’t say anything else as she closed the door. Apologising would have put him in a very vulnerable position and she had to believe that he was serious about this or she would do her best to cut him out of Izzy’s life.
It was still pouring down with rain as he walked back across the car park and the weather seemed to mirror his dejection at the way things had gone. He’d handled the situation very badly and he would have to try a lot harder in the future if he wasn’t going to alienate Lucy.
He sighed. Despite what he’d told her, he didn’t want to have to resort to a messy court hearing to gain access to Izzy. He would much prefer it if they could reach an agreement by themselves although if he couldn’t make Lucy see sense, he might not have any option except to apply to the courts.
The thought of the heartache that would cause was very hard to deal with. His spirits had sunk to an all-time low by the time he reached the paediatric unit. He could barely raise a smile when he met Bea Francis in the corridor and saw her surprise at his bedraggled state.
‘I’d forgotten about the joys of a British summer.’
‘So it would appear.’ She grinned at him. ‘So much for Lucy’s theory that you came back because you were missing our glorious weather!’
Connor drummed up a smile but it hurt to know that Lucy preferred to joke about the reason for his return rather than admit the truth. She was determined that no one would find out that he was Izzy’s father and he knew how difficult it was going to be to change her mind. It was a relief when Bea asked him if he’d take a look a Sophie Fisher because it was easier to focus on work than his own problems.
He quickly changed into a clean set of scrubs then made his way to the high-dependency unit. Dee was there and he could tell immediately that she wasn’t happy about the little girl’s condition. He checked the ECG tracing and understood immediately why she was so concerned. Sophie was exhibiting clear signs of ventricular fibrillation—rapid, uncoordinated and ineffective heart contractions. It was a common complication of myocardial infarction and although it could be successfully resolved by the use of drugs in many cases, the drugs weren’t working in this instance.
‘She’ll need cardioversion. I can do it here but I need to inform her parents first about what’s happening.’
‘They’re in the relatives’ room,’ Dee told him.
‘I’ll have a word with them and come straight back.’
Connor left the room and went to find the child’s parents. He waved them back to their seats and pulled up a chair, knowing how difficult this would be for them. ‘My name is Connor Mackenzie and I’m the new head of the paediatric unit,’ he told them, keeping the introductions brief. ‘I’m afraid that Sophie isn’t responding as well as we’d hoped she would to the drugs that were meant to settle her heart back into its proper rhythm.’
‘So what’s going to happen?’ Mrs Fisher asked anxiously.
‘I’ll have to perform cardioversion to restore her heart’s natural rhythm.’
‘Cardioversion? I’m sorry, Dr Mackenzie, but you’ve lost me.’ Mr Fisher leant forward in his seat and Connor could see the fear in his eyes. ‘It’s not another operation,