“Most people do.”
She rolled her eyes, just a little. “I see. Those who don’t know him like you do.” “You’ve got that right.”
She frowned, shaking her head and searching his face for clues. “What did he do to you, Mitch?” she asked gently.
Something hard flashed in his gaze and he grimaced. “We’re off topic,” he said. “We were talking about the fact that you had two kids who are part mine and you didn’t tell me about it.”
She lifted her chin. “No. We’re talking about the fact that I had two kids who are part yours and you wish I hadn’t.”
He stared down at her. How could he deny what she’d just said? It was true. She’d dropped a bombshell on him and he hadn’t recovered from the impact yet. He really wasn’t sure what he thought.
But one thing he knew for sure—babies or not, life-changing news or not, antagonism or not—he still wanted her like he’d never wanted any other woman. Every time he looked at her he felt that same pull, an attraction so strong, so deep, that it seemed almost physical. She drew him like a magnet. He longed for her, ached to hold her, hungered to feel that open, unrestrained response she’d given him in Paris. And yet, that seemed to be more and more impossible every moment. He could almost see the gulf widening between them. He hated that, but he had no idea how to stop it.
He’d been in a state of denial. He realized now that he’d felt this way for a long time. He’d dreamed about her on cold, empty nights in the Himalayas, seen her face in the reflective glass of windows on the streets of Brasilia, thought about her when he was alone and when he was in crowds. She’d been haunting him for two years. No wonder he’d finally had to come back.
But that didn’t make any sense. He hadn’t known she’d be here. He shook his head, rejecting that random thought. And yet …
Now, suddenly, the woman who obsessed him was the mother of his children. That brought him up short. What was he supposed to do with that? Emotions were churning inside him but he needed to sort them out. He wasn’t sure what he thought, what he felt. He needed a little time to think it all over.
“Listen, Darcy,” he said, turning to head back toward the house. “This has really knocked me for a loop. I can’t seem to put together a coherent thought right now. I need some time.”
She nodded. They walked back in silence, the crunching of the rocks beneath their feet the only sound. A cool breeze was kicking up, slapping her blond hair against her face. She shivered and drew her arms in close. As they came back in front of the house, she turned to him. Despite everything, she longed to have him love the boys the way she did. Maybe, if he got to know them …
“Do you want to come in?”
“No.”
She drew back, startled at his abrupt tone of voice.
“No,” he repeated, deliberately sounding gentler this time. “I think I’d better go. I’ve got to think about this.”
She nodded, but her heart sank. He seemed to read her disappointment in her face, because he hesitated and added, “Darcy, you know I’m not used to this yet. You’ve had two years to get used to it. I’m just starting down that road.”
“Sure,” she said. “I understand.”
He raked fingers through his hair and looked at her with a half smile. “Do you? That’s good. Because I sure don’t.”
She could have used a sharp retort against him but she didn’t. Something in the lost, bewildered look in his eyes stopped her. He really had been sent into a tailspin and needed to right himself before they talked more. She could see that. So she nodded when he said, “Goodbye.”
“See you tomorrow,” she said simply.
She watched him get into his car and start down the driveway. She stood where she was until he was out of sight.
“Why me?” she whispered to whatever power in the universe might be listening. “Surely there are others who deserve to be tortured much more than I do.”
This was all so disturbing, but she thought she understood him to a point. Yes, she understood his need for time to think, but there was something she didn’t understand. Or, maybe she understood it too well and just didn’t like it. He didn’t want to come in and see the babies again. Maybe he would never want to see them. That thought was like a knife through her heart. How could he turn his back on those two sweet babies?
And yet, what did she expect him to do? Oh sure, he could write a check and pretend that took care of everything. But what else did she want from him? It wasn’t even clear to her yet. Something was bruised deep inside her and she tried to figure out just exactly why. She was hurt and disappointed that Mitch was acting like he didn’t want the babies, but this was more. This had to do with his reaction to her.
Maybe it was for all she’d lost. She wasn’t that girl anymore, that open and loving woman who’d clung to him and made love to him so freely, so full of joy. That girl was gone forever. She could no longer do things just because she wanted to. She had two little babies to care for. She had to take them into account before she did anything at all.
So maybe that was it—a sense of mourning for the lost Darcy of old.
“Whatever,” she muttered to herself. “Good riddance, anyway.”
But her eyes brimmed with tears. “Has he gone?” Mimi asked as she came back into the house.
“Yes,” Darcy answered. “Thanks for taking the babies for me. Are they down?”
“Yes indeed, and sleeping soundly. They were all worn out from their escapade.”
Darcy smiled.
“Mitch is such a nice fellow,” Mimi went on, bending to pick up a toy lodged halfway under the couch. “He was always one of my favorites of Jimmy’s friends. Even with that mother of his.”
“His mother? Do you know her well?”
“Not well, but of course we had to deal with each other over the years, our sons being friends and all.” She stopped and considered, head to the side. “I always had the feeling that she wished Mitch would find someone else to spend his time with, someone from the wealthy neighborhood they lived in. But that could have been my imagination, I suppose.”
Darcy nodded. “I had a similar feeling the day I tried to talk to her about getting in touch with Mitch.”
“Oh. I see.”
She saw everything and knew everything. Darcy shook her head, half laughing. “Oh, Mimi, the answer is yes, Mitch is the father of my babies.”
Mimi shook her head, looking bemused. “Well, come on into the kitchen and have a cup of tea with me,” she said, “and tell me all about it. This is a story that’s been a long time coming, so it better be good.”
Darcy laughed lovingly as she turned to follow her friend. She knew Mimi was still disappointed that she and Jimmy hadn’t clicked romantically, but she was bighearted enough to want the best for Darcy anyway. And for the babies.
“It’s a fairly short story,” she warned. “But I’ll see what I can do to embellish it for you.”
“You do that,” Mimi said approvingly. “And I’ll brew the tea.”
CHAPTER FIVE
IT HAD been three long days since Mitch had returned. He and Darcy had been working together for two of them, and he hadn’t said a word about the twins. She’d started out on pins and needles, jumping every time he came near, waiting for him to bring up her babies and get things settled between them. But he was acting for all the world as though that afternoon at Mimi’s had never