‘’llo?’
‘Joe?’
‘Nnnng?’
‘It’s Lizzie. How are you?’ It was at that moment that Lizzie glanced at the clock. It was only 6.30. ‘Oh Joe, I’m sorry. You were asleep weren’t you?’
‘Well yes but it’s all right. How are you?’ he asked without a hint of irritation.
‘I’m fine,’ lied Lizzie. ‘How about you?’
‘Fine,’ lied Joe.
There was a short pause which threatened to lengthen towards awkwardness. Lizzie took a deep breath. ‘So, I wondered if you and Sam fancied meeting up some time?’ she asked casually as if this were an everyday occurrence.
‘Oh. Really?’ said Joe sounding surprised. Lizzie realised that she didn’t have a good reason for phoning out of the blue but she had deliberately decided not to mention the letters. They were her letters from Bea and she wasn’t ready to share them. ‘Well that would be great. If you’re sure?’
Lizzie hesitated. This could be the moment when she just gave up on it all, when she made an excuse, hung up and went back to her life, such as it was. She glanced at the letter again and Bea’s heartfelt words. She had no choice. ‘Of course. I think it would be really good for all of us. I’m free this Sunday if you are?’
‘We are actually. Shall we come to you or would you like to come here?’ asked Joe.
Lizzie felt panic rise in her chest and did her best to keep her voice calm. ‘Actually, I was thinking that Sam might like a day-trip somewhere in London? To the zoo or the aquarium perhaps?’
‘Okay. Great idea. Why don’t I ask him and I’ll text you to confirm later?’
‘Great, that sounds really great,’ said Lizzie aware that she was starting to sound a little crazy. ‘I’ll see you then,’ she added. ‘I should go. Sorry for waking you.’
‘No worries. It’s good to hear from you,’ said Joe before hanging up.
Lizzie pressed the phone to her forehead and closed her eyes. She felt as if she were sitting in a rollercoaster as it climbed to the top of the track. She was dreading the moment when she reached the top but part of her, a tiny part, wanted to see what happened when she came down the other side.
***
Lizzie felt an unusual sense of purpose as she went downstairs to open up the bookshop that day. It was as if taking the decision to do what Bea had asked was making her feel a little less burdened. She knew she’d be a mess of nerves on the day she went to meet Sam and Joe but somehow, simply making the decision to do this was having a positive effect on her mood.
Her thoughts were interrupted by something of a kerfuffle at the back of the shop. There was the sound of paws skidding on lino and Mrs Nussbaum telling something or someone to ‘Halt!’
Lizzie made her way towards the back room and drew aside the curtain to reveal Mrs Nussbaum being pulled through the door by an excitable, square-faced dog.
‘Morning, Lizzie!’ trilled Mrs Nussbaum, barely managing to stay on her feet. ‘Meet our newest member of staff, Bambi!’ Bambi barked a greeting.
‘Goodness!’ cried Lizzie, holding a hand out for the dog, who sniffed at his new friend with enthusiasm. ‘He’s lovely but are you sure about having a dog in the shop? It might scare people off.’
‘Ach, he’s an absolute süsse Maus,’ declared Mrs Nussbaum, ruffling the top of Bambi’s head. ‘My neighbour is moving to Australia to be nearer to her children so I suggest that he come and work for us. We can take him for a walk at lunchtime and he will keep me company at night. He is a Boxer, so he will be an excellent guard dog but I think that he will be a great hit with the customers too.’
Just as long as he doesn’t decide to take a chunk out of any of them, thought Lizzie. Bambi, obviously keen to get started in his new job, was straining at the lead so Lizzie took it from Mrs Nussbaum and led him down the shop. She spotted a mother with a pushchair about to enter the shop and then bid a hasty retreat once she saw Bambi. ‘Doggy!’ shouted the child as her mother ushered her away.
Lizzie sighed. ‘Come on, you,’ she said, pulling Bambi back. ‘I think we’re going to have to find you somewhere to sit where you won’t get into trouble.’ The dog whimpered agreement and settled down in an empty unpacking box next to Lizzie.
Mrs Nussbaum appeared a short time later with two mugs of tea. ‘Shall we have a try at the crossword?’ she asked.
Lizzie smiled and accepted the tea. ‘Good idea. We can do it while I’m placing the orders and then I’ll head to the bank.’
Lizzie appreciated this routine with Mrs Nussbaum. It was part of the reason why she felt safe here and had never contemplated going elsewhere. They worked companionably together but rarely discussed life beyond the day to day. Mrs Nussbaum sometimes mentioned Leonard but only in passing. Lizzie suspected that the old lady was as lonely as she was and she knew that they both found comfort in each other’s company. Today she considered telling her about Bea but she worried that Mrs Nussbaum might think her odd for not mentioning it before so she kept quiet. She didn’t want to do anything to upset her life here. She needed something constant in a world without Bea.
As the day progressed, Bambi settled very well into his new role. He seemed to understand instinctively the difference between friend and foe. He accompanied Lizzie to the bank like a professional security guard, barking at a charity collector who tried to stop them in the street. Back at the shop, he followed a mother towards the door when her toddler dropped its cuddly rabbit.
‘You might want to wash that,’ Lizzie remarked, fishing it out of Bambi’s mouth and handing it back to her.
The woman was startled but her face soon softened into a smile. ‘Oh thank you,’ she said. ‘There would have been hell to pay if we’d lost that. Aren’t you a lovely dog?’
‘Eeee!’ cried her child, pulling Bambi’s ear in appreciation. Lizzie held her breath, but Bambi turned towards the little girl and nuzzled her gently in the ribs. She began to giggle and hug the dog’s bony head.
‘Ahhhh, you’re a treasure aren’t you?’ said the mother, rubbing Bambi’s head. ‘I think it’s a great idea to have him around. The kids will love him.’
By the end of the day, Bambi’s celebrity status was assured. ‘Congratulations, Bambi. You’ve passed your probation and the job is yours if you want it,’ Lizzie said, feeling relieved as she locked the front door. Bambi barked an affirmative and followed her down the shop to where Mrs Nussbaum was counting the takings in the back room.
‘We’ve had a good day,’ said the old lady, glancing up from the piles of coins and notes.
‘Must be something to do with our new member of staff,’ said Lizzie patting Bambi on the head.
There was a knock at the front door and Bambi immediately turned on his tail to greet whoever it was. Lizzie followed behind and was surprised to see Susie and Ben from the coffee shop. Susie was peering through the glass eagerly whilst Ben stood behind her, arms folded, an impatient scowl on his face. They looked like comical opposites. Bambi reached the door first, barking as if to say, ‘What do you want? Friend or foe?’ Lizzie noticed Ben’s face dissolve into a smile at the sight of the dog. She unlocked the door and stood back to let them in. Bambi sniffed around them and, deciding they were friends, sat obediently at Ben’s feet ready to have a fuss made of him. Ben knelt down to stroke the dog, talking to him in a low, reassuring voice.
‘Hi, Lizzie,’ grinned Susie. ‘We thought it was high time we came and introduced ourselves properly to our landlady, didn’t we, Ben?’ Ben didn’t look up or speak.
‘Ben!’ hissed Susie.