In each chapter, you will learn how to change the way you think about and act upon your personal beliefs and values in these areas, and how such actions can lead to profound shifts in personal as well as global consciousness.
The benefits of living the Secret Life are countless. Changing your approaches to giving charity, to seeking justice, to loving others, and to believing in yourself enough to find and act on your higher calling will lead you to reach a level of resilience that will keep you grounded when you face difficulties and challenges. This is, quite literally, life-changing.
Best of all, it is never too late to start. Maimonides taught that as one ages, one’s intellect becomes stronger and purer, and one’s joy from that knowledge increases. With the added benefit of time and life experience, older adults are perhaps the most ideal practitioners of the Secret Life. Even if you feel that you have lived the majority of your life in a certain pattern that repeats itself time and again, the older you grow, the more intimately you know yourself and what matters most to you, and the more prepared you will be to accomplish great things.
So many success stories have begun later in life: Laura Ingalls Wilder published the first book in her Little House series at the age of 65, Julia Child learned to cook at age 40 and didn’t become a television host until she was 50, and Stan Lee, creator of Spider-Man and other Marvel superheroes, wrote his first comic books in his 40s, and to this day—at the age of 95—he enjoys a cameo appearance in every major motion film made about one of his characters. Even Moses, that great biblical figure to whom Maimonides was compared on his tombstone, wasn’t called by God to lead the Jewish people until he was 80 years old!
This goes to show that no matter when you start to practice the principles of the Secret Life, you can achieve great success. Whether you are 20 or 60, if you are willing to work on making better decisions, balancing your priorities, and dedicating yourself to a meaningful cause, you will see substantial change and success. Of course, we can never know how long we have in this life. But we should strive to never fall prey to the mentality that “time is running out, so why bother?” Humans now live longer and more productively than ever before. Age, as they say, is nothing but a number. And the greater your number, the greater your chances of making significant improvements in the world.
Are you ready to accomplish great things and change your whole outlook on life? If so, I urge you to quiet your mind, clear your desk, and spend some time evaluating how you have been approaching things until now, and how you can adjust your actions and choices to reflect a more ideal state. What you will find may just be the greatest secret of all.
CHAPTER ONE
THE SECRET OF CHARITY
Give a man a fish and he will eat for one day.
Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime.
attributed to Maimonides
When we think about giving charity, the images that come to mind are often simple and straightforward: dropping coins into a red iron kettle on a winter day while a bell sounds in the background, phoning in a donation that qualifies for the gift of a tote bag, or buying an extra can of tuna fish or jar of peanut butter at the grocery store during a food drive. In other words, we more often think of “giving a man a fish,” or helping someone solve an immediate problem, than “teaching a man to fish,” or changing someone’s long-term reality for the better. The idea that helping a person develop the skills and experience that will lead to employment and self-reliance is ideal is not a new one. In fact, this wisdom has been adopted by numerous cultures throughout the world for centuries.
The old adage, quoted above, “Give a man a fish and he will eat for one day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime” is universally appealing. While the source of this wisdom is ultimately unknown, it has been attributed to Chinese, Italian, and Native American traditions and to such famous thinkers as Lao-Tzu and Maimonides. Wherever it comes from, what it teaches us is a major component of what I call the Secret of Charity.
The Eight Levels of Charity
Maimonides discussed charity at length, describing it as the ultimate sign of a righteous person and one of the most important acts of humanity. Assuming that everyone is obligated to give charity according to his or her means, and that we are also obligated to do everything in our power to avoid being in need ourselves, he described Eight Levels of Giving to help us develop our charitable tendencies. At the lowest levels, the giver spends less than what he or she can reasonably afford and does so begrudgingly. In these situations, both the giver and the recipient see each other, and there is no attempt at anonymity. In every subsequent level, the attitude of the giver becomes more genuine, and the distance between specific donors and recipients becomes greater, so that one is not burdened with pride, and the other is free of the guilt or shame that might accompany recognition.
The highest, most ideal level of giving is the one in which your charity enables someone to ultimately become self-supporting. Teaching a person to “fish”—giving someone the knowledge he or she needs to hold a job and function in society—is the greatest kindness one person can bestow on another. As Maimonides taught, we can “anticipate charity by preventing poverty.”
Imagine what might happen to you if you were truly struggling financially. In times of uncertainty, we often find our thoughts quickly spiraling from one seemingly small problem to huge, overarching crises. While staring at a notice about a late car payment, you may begin to worry about the chain of events that might soon unfold. If you are unable to make your car payment, you might just lose the car. If you lose your car, how will you get to work? If you can’t get to work, you will lose your job. If you lose your job, you might not be able to pay your rent. And so forth. Before long, you are worried about everything, and you begin to panic. In that moment, you don’t just want a way to pay one month’s worth of a car loan. You want a way to shore up your whole situation. Ideally, you want to render the worst-case scenario impossible to begin with.
When we put ourselves in the position to help others, the best thing we can do is to anticipate the “worst-case scenario” and try to prevent it from coming to fruition. While giving people the means to help solve their immediate problems is always appreciated, helping them get to a state in which they no longer face those problems is even better. When we try to stand in the shoes of someone who is struggling, forward-looking and preventative help is what we would want most for ourselves.
One person who has certainly reached the highest levels of charitable giving is Oprah Winfrey, the billionaire who started out a poor girl in the rural South, a victim of emotional and physical abuse. She worked her way up to become one of the most successful and well-loved people in recent history. Oprah is famous for her generosity. She has donated literally millions of dollars to a variety of worthy causes. Of the many amazing acts of giving she has performed, perhaps the most admirable are the schools she has established and funded for underprivileged children in African communities where none previously existed. She has helped countless girls reach their life goals by providing merit-based scholarships—grants given to students who have proved their academic prowess alongside their financial need.
Oprah’s scholarships are not just tangible gifts. They recognize the hard work and effort of the recipients and help to ease the burdens of young women who would otherwise have to work several jobs while trying to focus on their studies. With the strain of paying for school lifted, recipients of Oprah’s scholarships can direct more of their energy to learning and developing their chosen professions. Rather than just feeding them fish for a day, Oprah has enabled these children to find their own fish, a gift that will last a lifetime. These students have been given the gift of education, and with it the chance to improve their lives and the lives of those in their family and community.
The Anonymous Gift
When