Perhaps nobody has broken as many hearts as the blonde bombshell, Marilyn Monroe. This gifted actress solidified her place at the top of the Hollywood it-list with star turns in films like Gentlemen Prefer Blondes and Some Like It Hot.
Marilyn herself was the subject of the last words of Joe DiMaggio.
The night before she died, she talked to Ratpacker and JFK brother-in-law Peter Lawford and said:
“Say goodbye to Pat, say goodbye to Jack, and say goodbye to yourself, because you’re a nice guy.”
Alfred Hitchcock (1899–1980)
There is no question that Hitchcock is one of the greatest directors of all time. Even though he, amazingly, never won an Oscar for directing, he created a list of masterpieces that is unrivalled in his genre: Psycho, Rear Window, Vertigo, The Birds, North by Northwest, Rebecca, and the list goes on and on.
His impact can’t be overstated. There is no other director that can be named just at the appearance of his shadow or upon the sound of his theme music.
The king of thrillers had more than a few things to say about the nature of film and life, including “Drama is life with the dull bits cut out,” and “There is no terror in the bang, only in the anticipation of it.” While they weren’t quite his very last words, in his last days Hitchcock left us with one more memorable line:
“One never knows the ending. One has to die to know exactly what happens after death. Although Catholics have their hopes.”
Del Close (1934–1999)
Del Close was of the key figures in the rise of improvisational theatre. Along with his longtime collaborators Charna Halpern and David Shepherd, Close helped to propel the American improv scene to new heights. Through the ’80s and ’90s, his teaching and guidance affected the comedy world more than perhaps any other single person.
Close’s students included Bill Murray, Chris Farley, Gilda Radner, John Candy, Stephen Colbert, Harold Ramis, John Belushi, Bob Odenkirk, Tina Fey, Mike Myers, and Amy Poehler—and that is just an abridged list to save space. His impact is still felt on the stages of New York, Chicago, and beyond.
His physical presence is still felt at Chicago’s Goodman Theatre, as in his will Close bequeathed his skull to the theater with instructions that it was to be used in Hamlet and that he should be credited in the program for playing Yorick. Funny to the end, Close’s last words were:
“I’m tired of being the funniest one in the room.”
Humphrey Bogart (1899–1957)
By all accounts, Bogart earned his tough-guy reputation. He was thrown out of private school (it is rumored for throwing his headmaster into a pond), served in the Navy, and honed his craft through hard-nosed persistence. After years of paying his dues, Bogart’s hard work paid off with star turns in classic films such as Casablanca, The Caine Mutiny, The African Queen, and The Maltese Falcon.
There are two different lines that have been reported to be the last words of Hollywood’s favorite tough guy. Some say Bogie’s last words were, “I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis.” These certainly sound like the hard-nosed actor we all know and love from his films. However, his wife Lauren Bacall reports that Bogart’s actual last words were a bit more touching, though still in character. As Bacall was leaving Bogie’s bedside to pick up their children, he said:
“Goodbye, kid. Hurry back.”
Tallulah Bankhead (1902–1968)
Tallulah Bankhead isn’t a household name, but she should be, as anyone who has seen her fantastic turn in Hitchcock’s film Lifeboat will tell you. Known as much for her caustic wit and devil-may-care attitude as for her impressive skills on the stage and screen, Bankhead was well ahead of her time.
Bankhead’s more famous witticisms include, “If I had to live my life again, I’d make the same mistakes, only sooner” and “Only good girls keep diaries. Bad girls don’t have time.”
She was unapologetic about her vices, famously drinking many a man under the table. Bankhead died at sixty-six, catching pneumonia after hanging out backstage in the nude. Her last words:
“Codeine, bourbon.”
Charles Gussman (1913–2000)
Like Tallulah, Gussman also may not be a household name. He made his mark behind the scenes as a writer of radio and television serials and soap operas. Gussman’s radio credits include Young Doctor Malone, The Right to Happiness, and The Road of Life. In later years he contributed to television shows, including Gilligan’s Island and the soap opera Days of Our Lives, the latter of which he is credited with naming.
While Gussman gave a lot of well-timed lines to a lot of characters over the years, he saved the best one for himself. On his deathbed, with his daughter at his side, Gussman reportedly leaned over and, with his last breath, said:
“And now for a final word from our sponsor.”
Walt Disney (1901–1966)
There is no question that Walt Disney’s combination of imagination and business sense changed the world. Regardless of what you think about today’s juggernaut of a corporation, Disney set the bar for animated films and created theme parks that, to this day, fill the dreams of children of all ages. As Walt himself once said, “All our dreams can come true, if we only have the courage to pursue them.”
Walt Disney Studios has been a launching pad for countless actors over the years: Shia LeBeouf, Ryan Gosling, that guy from the John Carter movie, Hillary Duff, and Kurt Russell, to name a few, though it is the last one that is important here. Apparently, as Walt was breathing his last, it wasn’t Mary Poppins or Mickey Mouse that filled his thoughts, but rather Snake Plissken. Just before his death, Disney wrote a note on a piece of paper. It said:
“Kurt Russell.”
James Stewart (1908–1997)
There are two types of people in this world: those who are fans of Jimmy Stewart and those you are better off not knowing.
The star of such films as Vertigo, It’s A Wonderful Life, and Harvey also flew missions for the US Air Force in World War II and had a fascinating life-long best friendship with Henry Fonda.
He is probably best summed up by this famous line from Harvey: “ ‘In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart, or oh so pleasant.’ For years I was smart. I recommend pleasant.”
Stewart lost his wife a few years before his own death, and his last thoughts were of her. His last words:
“I’m going to go be with Gloria now.”
Stan Laurel (1890–1965)
Stan is best known as the thin one in the legendary duo Laurel and Hardy. The pair were a phenomenon in their early slapstick films and only got funnier when they transitioned to talkies. The duo appeared in more than a hundred films together, including twenty-three features.
Laurel was often the head writer of the duo’s sketches and was known to have an extremely quick wit, both on and off stage. He was renowned for playing pranks and running sketches every chance he got.
On his deathbed, Laurel told his nurse “I’d rather be skiing,” which prompted her to ask if he knew how to ski. His reply:
“No, but I’d rather be skiing than doing what I’m doing.”
Oliver