In offering one’s opinion, one must first ascertain whether or not the recipient is in the right frame of mind to receive counsel. Strive to become a trusted colleague, and ensure that he has faith in your words. Start by broaching matters that he is interested in, and devise various ways of making your thoughts known. Decide on an appropriate time, and whether you should express your ideas in writing, or talk to him on the way home. Mention your own failures, and try to evoke his understanding indirectly. Or, while complimenting his finer attributes, present your views in such a way that he will happily take your advice to correct his shortfalls, just as a man with a dry throat reaches for water to quench his thirst.
To achieve this is very challenging. If a bad habit has become ingrained over many years, it cannot be remedied easily. I have also had experience with this. Being convivial and cooperating with one’s companions to rectify each other’s inadequacies to be of better use to the lord is what constitutes genuinely compassionate service. Remember though, how can you expect a man to become a better person just through humiliating him?
15. Making an opinion known to somebody verbally. Regarding a rōnin who loathed his master: Painfully aware of his transgressions, a certain rōnin returned to serve his lord after five or six years’ absence. At first, he rejected the offer to return to service, but made a pledge after accepting the second invitation. Having refused the first time he should have resigned once and for all. Or, he could have shaved his head to become a monk.
Similarly, a rōnin who does not acknowledge his mistakes and begrudges his master should not be allowed to return. If he persists in bewailing the “unsympathetic” treatment he received, or continues to feel “animosity,” the heavens will spurn him all the more. A man once said: “It is a heavenly reprimand. Simply acknowledge that you are solely at fault and repent, otherwise you will never be able to resume service again.”
16. After serving as Sawabe Heizaemon’s second (kaishaku) on the event of his seppuku, I (Jōchō) received a letter of appreciation from clan elder Nakano Kazuma of Edo.54 In it he stated in the most elaborate terms that the family’s reputation had been restored. At the time, I thought that it was excessive to write such a letter for assisting in Sawabe’s suicide. After further consideration, I realized that it was quite tactful. It is important to commend young warriors if they perform their duties well in order to motivate them, even if it was only a trifling achievement. That is why he wrote the letter. Not long after, I also received a note of praise from Nakano Shōgen.55 I have kept both letters safe. Yamamoto Gorōzaemon presented me a gift of saddle and stirrups.
17. Yawning in the presence of others is impolite. If the urge to yawn suddenly arises, rub your forehead in an upward stroke to suppress it. If this is not enough to restrain the yawn, use the tip of your tongue to lock your lips shut, and cover your gaping mouth with your hand or sleeve to conceal it from others. Sneezes should also be stifled. Sneezes and yawns make you look very silly. There are many other points of etiquette that you should be mindful of at all times.
18. Master Jōchō pondered tasks for the coming day and wrote them down. Being organized keeps you a step ahead of others. When scheduled to meet somebody the following day, make a careful assessment the night before, contemplating appropriate greetings, topics of conversation, and points of etiquette. He relayed the following advice when we travelled somewhere together. It is good practice to think things through when going to visit somebody. This is to ensure that harmony prevails. It is also a matter of protocol. Furthermore, if one is invited by a man of high standing, it is not good to be too nervous beforehand as you will be unable to converse properly at the start. Instead, one should feel genuine gratitude for the opportunity to meet, and embark with feelings of joyous anticipation.
It is generally best to avoid visiting somebody unexpectedly when you have no business there. On the other hand, if you are invited you should act in such a way that your host regards you as an “agreeable visitor;” otherwise you have no place as a guest. In any case, it is important to organize yourself well beforehand. This is most important at a drinking party. The best time to excuse yourself is hard to discern. Your stay should not become wearisome, but care should be taken not to be in a hurry to leave early, either. Usually, it is inadvisable to be too restrained when offered morsels to partake of. Politely refrain from accepting once or twice, but then capitulate to your host’s kind generosity. This also applies when you meet somebody by chance on the road and are invited to their home.
19. In essence, the “Four Oaths” have the following meaning:56 “Never fall behind others in pursuing the Way of the warrior” means you must be prepared to demonstrate your gallantry to all and sundry and always be ready to die for your cause. This is recorded in more detail in Gukenshū.57 The second pledge, “be ready to serve one’s lord,” means aspiring to becomes a karō (chief retainer), a position in which you remonstrate with your lord for the sake of the clan. “Filial duty” (kō) is connected with “loyalty” (chū). They are the same. “Serve compassionately for the benefit of others” means encouraging other men to be exemplary servants.
20. When discussing paraphernalia needed for a wedding, one person made the observation: “A koto and shamisen58 are not included in this list, but we will need them.” Another person remarked curtly, “We don’t need them at all.” This individual made his comments fully aware of the company present, but contradicted himself the following day by stating that the two instruments were in fact essential for weddings after all, and that two of each, of the highest quality, should be acquired. Upon hearing this story, I thought: What a venerable fellow [for admitting he was wrong]. Master Jōchō said to me: “It is wrong to think like that. He acted that way simply to assert his authority. Such conduct is often encountered among outsiders of equivocal loyalty employed in our domain. First of all, it is rude to behave in such a way to a person of higher station; and it does not benefit his lord at all. To an adherent of the Way of the warrior, even if an item is reckoned to be completely unnecessary, correct deportment dictates that one first acknowledge the other person’s assessment, and mention that it can be discussed later on so as to not cause embarrassment. Furthermore, the items in question were actually necessary, so he requested that they be added to the list the next day. This was devious, discourteous behavior that consequently humiliated his colleague publicly, and was very careless.”
21. There is disparity in the military tactics and strategy (gungaku) demonstrated by men who are prepared, and those who are not. The prepared warrior is not only able to solve problems in a quick and commendable fashion by virtue of his life experience, but he can react appropriately through his comprehension of measures to meet any scenario. He is always ready. The unprepared warrior lacks foresight, and even if he succeeds in solving a problem, it is merely through good fortune rather than good planning. A warrior who doesn’t think things through beforehand will be ill-equipped.
22. Master Jōchō said, “It would