“But we didn’t,” I said.
He stopped and sighed. “The point I’m getting at is this . . . you’re just fourteen, darling. You have all of life ahead of you. If you experience everything now, before you’re ready, what will be left?”
“I’m not exactly sure what you mean,” I said. I looked at him, frowning.
“I mean that I doubt you and Joshua are ready for this kind of intimacy. Did he pressure you in some way and make you feel—”
I shook my head. “No. Really, Daddy. Not at all.”
“He didn’t make you feel that unless you did it, he’d be angry or wouldn’t see you again?”
“No . . . really, we’re just doing it because we want to.”
“Doing it?” Daddy looked startled.
Suddenly I wondered if we were talking about the same thing. “What we were doing last night when—”
“You’ve done it before?” He looked horrified.
“Well . . . yeah.”
“How many times?”
I giggled, mainly from nervousness. “I don’t know. I haven’t been keeping track.”
Daddy still had that horrified expression. “But, I mean, for how long? When did this start?”
“In June.”
“June? That’s four months ago!”
I nodded.
“You’ve been doing it for four months?”
“Yeah.”
He seemed at a loss for words. “Who knew about this? Did Delia know? Did Amanda know?”
“I guess I thought everyone knew,” I said sheepishly. Actually, I hadn’t been sure, but I’d sort of assumed it.
“How old is Joshua?” Daddy said sternly.
“Well, he’ll be sixteen at the end of October . . . His birthday is the same week as yours, Daddy. He’s a Scorpio too.”
“And, I mean, has he had many . . .” he waved his hands “. . . amorous involvements?”
“You mean with girls?”
“He’s done it with boys, too?”
“No, I just wasn’t sure what you meant.”
“Does he go around fucking every pretty girl he can lay his hands on or what?”
“No!” What an awful thing to say! “Joshua’s not like that, Daddy. Really. We’re in love with each other.”
“Love?” Daddy looked dismayed.
I looked at him, puzzled. “Well, didn’t you think we were? That’s why we do it, because we love each other.”
“Darling.” He heaved a huge sigh.
“What, Daddy?”
“You’re fourteen years old.”
“I know that, Daddy.”
“Love and sex—You should be out flying kites, going to parties, having fun.”
“I am having fun.”
“This is your childhood. You’ll never have it again. Once it’s gone, it’s gone.”
“Daddy, fourteen isn’t childhood.”
“Well, it’s too young for screwing around!” He looked angry.
I felt like I was going to cry. “It’s not screwing around.”
“That boy’s parents should be taken to jail. ‘Our son knows what he’s doing.’ Bullshit!” His face was getting red.
Just then the door opened and Mom came in. Her cheeks were all pink—she has very light skin. She looked pretty. “Oh, hi, darling. Sorry, I’m a little late. Thanks, Tat, for setting the table.” She threw her coat on the front-hall table. “Oh God, wait till I tell you what Simon said about the show.”
“Simon said,” Daddy said grimly.
“The chicken’ll only take a sec,” Mom said placatingly. “It just has to be warmed up. Go call Deel, will you, hon?”
As we sat down, Mom said, “Listen, you’re not going to believe this but—”
“I gather no one here is interested in what happened with the Laskers,” Daddy said, interrupting her.
“The who’s?” Mom said, ripping off a chunk of bread. Mom is like me. She can eat everything in sight and never get fat.
“The Laskers?” Daddy said patiently. “Joshua’s parents?”
“Oh, right,” Mom said. “Yeah, what happened?”
“We’re meeting them for a drink at nine.”
“Oh great,” Mom said cheerfully. “I’ve always wanted to meet them. Isn’t he a lawyer or some such thing?”
“Correct,” Daddy said. “He—”
“What does she do, Tat?” Mom said. Mom is always more interested in what mothers do.
“Something with charities,” I said, cutting my chicken. Mom had put wine in it and mushrooms, which I don’t like. I began heaping them neatly to one side of my plate.
“Ugh,” Mom said.
“Ugh?” said Daddy.
“I just hate people who do things with charities.”
“Well, that’s a nice charitable attitude to have,” Daddy said dryly.
“Oh, you know what I mean, sweetie. All those ghastly people who lord it over you, doing good.”
“Would you like them if they were doing bad?” Daddy said, pouring himself a second glass of wine.
“I think so,” Mom said. “I mean, doing good is so dreary. At least doing bad is inventive.”
“She’s his second wife,” I said.
“Who?” said Mom.
“Joshua’s mother.”
“Okay,” Mom said. “I can’t very well inveigh against second wives, being one myself.”
“He divorced her,” I said. “I mean, he got her a divorce, and then he got himself one and then they got married.”
“And from which union did Joshua spring?” Daddy asked.
“She didn’t have any kids from the first one. I think he had, like, a few, one or two or something.”
“One tends to lose count,” Daddy said.
“They’re grown up,” I said. “In college or even out of college. They have regular jobs and stuff like that.”
“Now can I tell about the show?” Mom said.
“Yeah, what’s happening?” Deel said.
“So, we’re just going to drop the Laskers and the whole topic?” Daddy said. “Is that the idea? Everything’s said that can be?”
Mom looked at him, her head to one side. “Sweetie.”
“Sweetie what?” Daddy said.
“Well, I mean, do we have to brood about this all evening? We’re going to meet them, we’ll hash it all out. Why rant on endlessly?”
“Was