We salespeople ask both men (results buyers) and women (experience buyers) these same questions. The difference is that women are more aware of the PERSONAL side to sales and will make very quick decisions during this initial interview process about whether a salesperson seems sincere, acts courteously, and treats them appropriately, and whether they will feel COMFORTABLE doing business with that salesperson.
Women size up the situation in termsof HOW they want to buy, whereas men tend to focus on WHAT theywant to buy.
The same holds true for communication. Women focus on how something is said, and men focus on what is being said.
Women also tend to be very personally CONNECTED to their purchases. I honestly believe that a great many of the purchases women make are directly related to something that is worrying them. The purchase is made to bring relief. The car is getting old and unsafe, so let’s take it in; I want to make sure we can travel when we retire, so let’s invest; the roof might leak, so let’s fix it first; the kids need clothes; office supplies are low; or this old computer might crash, so let’s get a new one.
A good example is when my husband and I were exploring different options for a new will. He was not at all excited about the whole process: he can’t drive it, eat it, play with it, or sleep on it. Plus, he said it was depressing to think about and not a fun way to spend money. Left to him, I think making a will would have remained on his to-do-when-nothing-else-is-going-on-in-the-world list forever. Basically he was there to buy a service—not because he wanted it, but because I did. This is a perfect example of how women INFLUENCE men to BUY.
I, on the other hand, felt we were personally (see, there’s that word we women like to use) responsible for making sure that everyone was taken care of in the event of our deaths. I didn’t think it was fun either, but I was eager to get it done so I could STOP WORRYING about it.
When we met with our estate planner, I brought a huge load of emotion into the meeting—thoughts of my family, my feelings of responsibility, memories, concerns about doing the right thing by everybody, fears about how I would live without my husband, thoughts about what would happen if I died first (would he remarry? How long would it take him to remarry?) I got a bit off track.
That’s a PRIME EXAMPLE of how men and women differ! I guarantee you none of those thoughts were going through my husband’s head! In fact, when I asked him what he was thinking, he said, “I think I would have been better off parking under a tree, where it’s shady, so the car won’t get hot if we are gone for a long time.” Seriously? That’s what was going on in his mind as we walked in to write our wills?
As I walked into the office, I was concerned about much more than the bottom line—in fact, details and cost were not even in my thoughts at that point. I wanted to make certain that this particular estate planner was WILLING TO LISTEN and then integrate everything I wanted and needed, not just simply write up a will. From the moment I was introduced, I was aware of each nuance of the process. I immediately began to look for clues as to how I would be TREATED and whether this was someone I wanted to continue to do business with. Let there be no doubt: I was conducting an internal interview based on how he acted and reacted to my PERSONAL needs and expectations.
My husband, on the other hand, was sitting quietly, waiting to see what was going to happen, and reserving judgment on the details until he had a chance to hear the FACTS and get a handle on the BOTTOM LINE. He was focused on the END RESULTS.
And ME? I was focused on the entire EXPERIENCE. Truth be told, I began judging the experience the minute I walked into the elevator of the building.
Like me, many women are looking to accomplish much more in their relationship with a salesperson than finding someone to simply take their orders. Therefore, you must be aware from the very first second how much weight a woman is placing on the person she does business with. A woman wants to do business with someone she likes and trusts, someone she feels comfortable with, and someone she believes she can count on.
While a man might put up with an unfriendly auto mechanic who does excellent work at great prices, a woman won’t. She’ll pay a little more and take her car to someone she likes and who treats her with RESPECT—as long as she’s still confident he or she can get the job done. If she’s not satisfied with the second mechanic, she’ll go to a third and a fourth until she finds someone she can trust and feel comfortable doing business with.
A woman’s need for a positive,personal experience means that the CONNECTION between her andthe salesperson is much MOREIMPORTANT than you might think;it takes precedence over almosteverything else.
I’ll give you an example. I know a couple who moved into our neighborhood a few years ago from an area about thirty minutes away. The woman still drives the half hour to her previous hairdresser, dry cleaner, drugstore, and gym. We have all of these services within a block of our house, but it’s worth the drive to her to continue to use people she feels CONNECTED to and has developed personal relationships with. Her husband, on the other hand, took no time at all discovering the closest places that could meet his needs and switched his services immediately. He discovered he could get the results he needed right around the corner.
THE GOOD NEWS: a female buyer ismuch more likely to STAY LOYAL, even if it means being slightlyinconvenienced. That’s POWERFUL!
QUICK TIP: if you want to sell to women, learning to invest in and manage the PERSONAL aspects of the process is critical to your success.
#2: SHE WANTS THE EXPERIENCE TO BE PROFESSIONAL
Even though women want their sales experience to be PERSONAL, that does not mean they don’t also expect it to be PROFESSIONAL. In fact, in order for her to accept and be comfortable with a PERSONAL shopping experience, it must also pass the test of being PROFESSIONAL. Most women are savvy shoppers and will ultimately be focused on making a good, intelligent, and price-conscious decision, regardless of their personal feelings—it’s just that you will have to pass the PERSONAL test before she can move to the next step. Ideally, the two will go hand-in-hand, but don’t think you can play on her emotions to get her to make a purchase that isn’t in her best interests.
It has often been said that with women, emotion drives reason, and with men, reason drives emotion. I don’t think this is giving women (or men) nearly enough credit. Women couldn’t be where they are today if they constantly allowed emotion to take precedence over common sense and value. But it’s worth noting how much women can feel, do, and process at the same time.
Women can evaluate the personal side of the experience: do I feel respected? Do I like them? Do they like me? Are they friendly? Are they enjoyable to be around? And at the very same time, they can be weighing other critical factors: your experience and credentials, the value of the product, the quality of the service, and whether you can be trusted. So when I tell you that a woman wants the experience to be personal, don’t underestimate her absolute need for a professional experience. Both weigh heavily in her decision to continue the sales relationship with you.
Ultimately,