So clearly, with 85 percent of the buying decisions being made by women—that’s the gals out-buying the guys eight to one—it’s time to get serious about learning how to effectively sell to women. What they want. Need. What they want, need, and deserve when it comes to how they buy, and from whom they choose to buy. In order to do that, we have to delve into how women think, act, connect, judge, and make decisions. Whew! Sound complicated? Well, women are complicated—but worth it!
First, let’s begin by defining SALES. Sales is NOT just about selling a product or a service. The act of selling is everywhere in your life. Married? You are in sales. Parent? You are definitely in sales. Have a boss? Sales again. Work on a team? Constant sales. In fact, the ability to sell is key to your success in every relationship of your life. Let’s expand our definition of sales.
SALES is the art of persuading,motivating, or influencing others tobe open to new thoughts, behaviors,attitudes, and ideas.
You know, we start selling almost from the moment we can talk. Just follow a two-year-old around. They know all the techniques. They know how to ask for what they want. They overcome objections. They intuitively know which parent to ask, depending on what they want. They don’t let rejection get in their way—they simply try again. And they close most of their deals.
Truth be told, isn’t that your BIGGEST WORRY? NOT closing the deal. NOT making the sale. LOSING the customer and never knowing why. Imagine what a difference it would make if you could really get inside the mind of your customers and know what they needed or wanted to close the deal, so you could help them to make the decision to BUY FROM YOU.
I have spent a lifetime helping people understand people. Why people do what they do and say what they say—especially when it comes to the buying process. And if there is any industry where an understanding of the psychology of human nature is absolutely necessary, it is SALES. And the first thing psychology tells us is this (drumroll, please…): men and women are different! Especially when it comes to sales. The problem is, very few salespeople have had the extra training necessary to understand those differences.
Right now, you’re probably contemplating a very politically correct thought, like, “I make it a point to treat men and women exactly the same.” Um… REALLY? Look, if that’s actually true (and I doubt it), then that’s exactly why you’re losing sales—to both genders. We’ve already determined that each has a significantly different buying style. What is more likely is that you DO sell to men and women DIFFERENTLY, but you’ve never identified how, or, more importantly, why. There is no plan in your mind for how to approach each differently, so you just resort to the techniques that work most of the time. As a salesperson, YOU have to be the one willing and able to adjust your style, personality, and techniques to fit their needs. Great sales is not about YOU—it is all about the customer. So it all comes down to the DEAL BREAKERS.
The truth is: what is a Deal Breaker for a woman is not necessarily a Deal Breaker for a man, and vice-versa Men & women don’t BUY the And if you don’t understand same way. Stop SELLING to the difference, I guarantee you will leave money on the table and send customers to your competitor.
Deal Breakers are those sneaky little things you might be doing (or not doing), saying (or not saying), and even thinking (or not thinking) that could cause your customers to head in the opposite direction. You probably don’t even recognize them—or you would change them—but they are PAINFULLY apparent to your buyers. Deal Breakers are deadly, silent killers. They’ve killed the deal, and you didn’t even understand why. And don’t count on the customer to tell you the truth. Instead, they will say things like, “I’ve decided to go another direction,” “It’s just not the right time right now,” or, “I think I’ll just look around a little more.” Or even worse—you think you had it in the bag, and then they never even return your call, leaving you confused and wondering, “What happened?”
Remember—this book isn’t just written for men. There are plenty of women selling to other women who may not be using the right approach to close the deal. Let’s face it—most old-school sales training was developed BY men selling TO men. And the other thing I have realized is that a lot of successful women are “results” buyers and assume all other women are like them. Women aren’t necessarily picking up on the fact that other women may have a different buying style than their own.
Just because you are a womandoesn’t mean that you intuitivelyunderstand how to sell to women.
In some ways, this book is more important for you than for your male colleagues. I’m sure you have figured this out already, but the sad truth is that women will always be harder on you, be less forgiving of you, and take it more personally when you let them down or misread them than men. Women naturally expect other women to understand their needs better than men do. So you’re on the spot, and you have to make sure you really can understand their needs.
Not to mention the fact that your female customers are sizing you up faster than your male customers.
And, even though this book is focused on women, I also devote a fair amount of time to the buying and shopping habits of men—just to help clarify the differences between men and women. So to both my male and female readers: you will definitely learn a few things about selling to men that you may never have heard before as well. Ah… two books for the price of one.
So, what’s ahead?
I’m going to tell you what women usually want compared to what men usually want, what you’re doing that may negatively influence or have an impact on her desire to buy from you (Deal Breakers), and exactly how you can change your sales style and techniques to turn those Deal Breakers into Deal Makers.
And be warned: anytime we prepare to move to a different level f expertise and understanding, you’ll be expected to do a bit of self-evaluation. That is probably the toughest part for those of us in sales.
Healthy egos give us the confidence necessary to be successful in sales; however, our egos also make it more difficult for us to assess ourselves critically and be open to new ways of thinking, acting, and behaving. I can imagine that there will be times throughout this book when you might be inclined to read what I’ve written and say, “I would never do that,” “I don’t think that way,” or, “No one would ever see me like that.” But if you have ever lost a sale to a woman, odds are, you said or did something that she considered to be a Deal Breaker. Now the key is to understand why, when, and how that might have happened.
So in preparation for some upcoming self-analysis, let me ask you some important questions:
Do you want to build a better female clientele?
Do you want to close more deals with women?
Do you want more repeat business from your female customers?
Are you willing to learn new ways to COMMUNICATE and CONNECT with both prospects and customers?
Are you open to new ideas, strategies, and suggestions that can and will change your course in terms of building stronger relationships—both personally and professionally?
Can you and will you set aside some of those way-thingshave-always-been-done mindsets and adopt CHANGE in an entirely new way?
If so, you’re in the right place. Let’s start!