mrs. cheveley
Do you think it quite charming of you to be so rude to a woman in your own house?
·157· lord goring
In the case of very fascinating women, sex is a challenge, not a defence.
mrs. cheveley
I suppose that is meant for a compliment. My dear Arthur, women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the two sexes.
lord goring
Women are never disarmed by anything, as far as I know them.
mrs. cheveley
[After a pause.] Then you are going to allow your greatest friend, Robert Chiltern, to be ruined, rather than marry some one who really has considerable attractions left. I thought you would have risen to some great height of self-sacrifice, Arthur. I think you should. And the rest of your life you could spend in contemplating your own perfections.
lord goring
Oh! I do that as it is. And self-sacrifice is a thing that should be put down by law. It is so demoralizing to the people for whom one sacrifices oneself. They always go to the bad.
·158· mrs. cheveley
As if anything could demoralize Robert Chiltern! You seem to forget that I know his real character.
lord goring
What you know about him is not his real character. It was an act of folly done in his youth, dishonourable, I admit, shameful, I admit, unworthy of him, I admit, and therefore … not his true character.
mrs. cheveley
How you men stand up for each other!
lord goring
How you women war against each other!
mrs. cheveley
[Bitterly.] I only war against one woman, against Gertrude Chiltern. I hate her. I hate her now more than ever.
lord goring
Because you have brought a real tragedy into her life, I suppose.
mrs. cheveley
[With a sneer.] Oh, there is only one real tragedy in a woman’s life. The fact that her past ·159· is always her lover, and her future invariably her husband.
lord goring
Lady Chiltern knows nothing of the kind of life to which you are alluding.
mrs. cheveley
A woman whose size in gloves is seven and three-quarters never knows much about anything. You know Gertrude has always worn seven and three-quarters? That is one of the reasons why there was never any moral sympathy between us…. Well, Arthur, I suppose this romantic interview may be regarded as at an end. You admit it was romantic, don’t you? For the privilege of being your wife I was ready to surrender a great prize, the climax of my diplomatic career. You decline. Very well. If Sir Robert doesn’t uphold my Argentine scheme, I expose him. Voilà tout.
lord goring
You mustn’t do that. It would be vile, horrible, infamous.
mrs. cheveley
[Shrugging her shoulders.] Oh! don’t use big words. They mean so little. It is a commercial transaction. That is all. There is no good mixing up sentimentality in it. I offered to sell Robert Chiltern a certain thing. If he won’t pay me my ·160· price, he will have to pay the world a greater price. There is no more to be said. I must go. Good-bye. Won’t you shake hands?
lord goring
With you? No. Your transaction with Robert Chiltern may pass as a loathsome commercial transaction of a loathsome commercial age; but you seem to have forgotten that you who came here to-night to talk of love, you whose lips desecrated the word love, you to whom the thing is a book closely sealed, went this afternoon to the house of one of the most noble and gentle women in the world to degrade her husband in her eyes, to try and kill her love for him, to put poison in her heart, and bitterness in her life, to break her idol and, it may be, spoil her soul. That I cannot forgive you. That was horrible. For that there can be no forgiveness.
mrs. cheveley
Arthur, you are unjust to me. Believe me, you are quite unjust to me. I didn’t go to taunt Gertrude at all. I had no idea of doing anything of the kind when I entered. I called with Lady Markby simply to ask whether an ornament, a jewel, that I lost somewhere last night, had been found at the Chilterns’. If you don’t believe me, you can ask Lady Markby. She will tell you it is true. The scene that occurred happened after Lady Markby had left, and was really forced on me by Gertrude’s rudeness and sneers. I called, oh!—a little out of malice if you like—but really to ask if a diamond ·161· brooch of mine had been found. That was the origin of the whole thing.
lord goring
A diamond snake-brooch with a ruby?
mrs. cheveley
Yes. How do you know?
lord goring
Because it is found. In point of fact, I found it myself, and stupidly forgot to tell the butler anything about it as I was leaving. [Goes over to the writing-table and pulls out the drawers.] It is in this drawer. No, that one. This is the brooch, isn’t it? [Holds up the brooch.]
mrs. cheveley
Yes. I am so glad to get it back. It was … a present.
lord goring
Won’t you wear it?
mrs. cheveley
Certainly, if you pin it in. [Lord Goring suddenly clasps it on her arm.] Why do you put it on as a bracelet? I never knew it could be worn as a bracelet.
·162· lord goring
Really?
mrs. cheveley
[Holding out her handsome arm.] No; but it looks very well on me as a bracelet, doesn’t it?
lord goring
Yes; much better than when I saw it last.
mrs. cheveley
When did you see it last?
lord goring
[Calmly.] Oh, ten years ago, on Lady Berkshire, from whom you stole it.
mrs. cheveley
[Starting.] What do you mean?
lord goring
I mean that you stole that ornament from my cousin, Mary Berkshire, to whom I gave it when she was married. Suspicion fell on a wretched servant, who was sent away in disgrace. I recognized it last night. I determined to say nothing about it till I had found the thief. I have found the thief now, and I have heard her own confession.
·163· mrs. cheveley
[Tossing her head.] It is not true.
lord goring
You know it is true. Why, thief is written across your face at this moment.
mrs. cheveley
I will deny the whole affair from beginning to end. I will say that I have never seen this wretched thing, that it was never in my possession.
[Mrs. Cheveley tries to get the bracelet off her arm, but fails. Lord Goring looks on amused. Her thin fingers tear at the jewel to no purpose. A curse breaks from her.]
lord goring
The drawback of stealing a thing, Mrs. Cheveley, is that one never knows how wonderful the thing that one steals is. You can’t get