January 28. I have, for these several days, prayed much to ascertain whether the Lord will have me to go as a missionary to the East Indies, and I am most willing to go, if he will condescend to use me in this way. January 29. I have been greatly stirred up to pray about going to Calcutta as a missionary. May the Lord guide me in this matter! (After all my repeated and earnest prayer in the commencement of 1835, and willingness on my part to go, if it were the Lord’s will, still, he did not send me.)
February 25. In the name of the Lord, and in dependence upon him alone for support, we have established a fifth day school for poor children, which to-day has been opened. We have now two boys’ schools and three girls’ schools.
Mr. Müller having determined to visit Germany, chiefly on missionary business, reached London February 27, and writes:—
This morning I went to the Alien Office for my passport. On entering the office, I saw a printed paper, in which it is stated that every alien neglecting to renew every six months his certificate of residence, which he receives on depositing his passport, subjects himself to a penalty of fifty pounds, or imprisonment. This law I have ignorantly broken ever since I left London, in 1829. It appeared to me much better to confess at once that I had ignorantly done so than now wilfully break it; trusting in the Lord as it regarded the consequences of the step. I did so, and the Lord inclined the heart of the officer with whom I had to do to pass over my non-compliance with the law, on account of my having broken it ignorantly. Having obtained my passport, I found an unexpected difficulty in the Prussian ambassador refusing to sign it, as it did not contain a description of my person, and therefore I needed to prove that I was the individual spoken of in the passport. This difficulty was not removed for three days, when, after earnest prayer, through a paper signed by some citizens of London, to whom I am known, the ambassador was satisfied. This very difficulty, when once the Lord had removed it, afforded me cause for thanksgiving; for I now obtained a new passport, worded in a way that, should I ever need it again, will prevent similar difficulties.
Mr. Müller was absent for five weeks, during which time he experienced many answers to prayer and encouragements to faith.
April 15. Bristol. Yesterday, at one, we landed in London. In answer to prayer, I soon obtained my things from the custom-house, and reached my friends in Chancery Lane a little before two.
June 3. To-day we had a public meeting on account of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution for Home and Abroad. It is now fifteen months since, in dependence upon the Lord for the supply of means, we have been enabled to provide poor children with schooling, circulate the Holy Scriptures, and aid missionary labors. During this time, though the field of labor has been continually enlarging, and though we have now and then been brought low in funds, the Lord has never allowed us to be obliged to stop the work. We have been enabled during this time to establish three day schools, and to connect with the Institution two other charity day schools, which, humanly speaking, otherwise would have been closed for want of means. The number of the children that have been thus provided with schooling, in the day schools only, amounts to 439. The number of copies of the Holy Scriptures which have been circulated is 795 Bibles and 753 New Testaments. We have also sent, in aid of missionary labors in Canada, in the East Indies, and on the Continent of Europe, one hundred and seventeen pounds, eleven shillings. The whole amount of the free-will offerings put into our hands for carrying on this work from March 5, 1834, to May 19, 1835, is £363 12s. 0¾d.
June 22. This morning at two my father-in-law died. June 25. Our little boy is so ill that I have no hope of his recovery. The Lord’s holy will be done concerning the dear little one. June 26. My prayer, last evening, was, that God would be pleased to support my dear wife under the trial, should he remove the little one; and to take him soon to himself, thus sparing him from suffering. I did not pray for the child’s recovery. It was but two hours after that the dear little one went home. I am so fully enabled to realize that the dear infant is so much better off with the Lord Jesus than with us, that I scarcely feel the loss at all, and when I weep I weep for joy.
July 18. I have felt for several days weak in my chest. This weakness has been increasing, and to-day I have felt it more than ever. I have thought it well to refrain next week from all public speaking. May the Lord grant that I may be brought nearer to him through this, for I am not at all in the state in which I ought to be, and I think sometimes that our late afflictions have been lost upon me, and that the Lord will need to chastise me severely.
July 31. To-day brother C——r, formerly a minister in the establishment, who came to us a few days since, began, in connection with the Scriptural Knowledge Institution, to go from house to house to spread the truth as a city missionary. [This was a remarkable interposition of God. Brother Craik had before this, for some months, been unable, on account of bodily infirmity, to labor in the work of the schools, the circulation of the Scriptures, etc., and my own weakness, shortly after brother C——r’s arrival, increased so that I was obliged to give up the work entirely. How gracious, therefore, of the Lord to send brother C——r, that thus the work might go on! Up to July, 1837, this beloved brother was enabled to continue in his work, and thus this little Institution was in a most important way enlarged as it regards the field of labor.]
August 24. I feel very weak, and suffer more than before from the disease. I am in doubt whether to leave Bristol entirely for a time. I have no money to go away for a change of air. I have had an invitation to stay for a week with a sister in the country, and I think of accepting the invitation, and going to-morrow. August 26. To-day I had five pounds given to me for the express purpose of using change of air. August 29. To-day I received another five pounds for the same purpose.
August 30. To-day, for the first Lord’s day since our arrival in Bristol, I have been kept from preaching through illness. How mercifully has the Lord dealt in giving me so much strength for these years! I had another five pounds sent to aid me in procuring change of air. How kind is the Lord in thus providing me with the means for leaving Bristol! September 2. Went with my family to Portishead.
September 15. As I clearly understood that the person who lets me his horse has no license, I saw that, being bound as a believer to act according to the laws of the country, I could use it no longer; and as horse exercise seems most important, humanly speaking, for my restoration, and as this is the only horse which is to be had in the place, we came to the conclusion to leave Portishead to-morrow. Immediately after, I received a kind letter from a brother and two sisters in the Lord, who live in the Isle of Wight, which contained a fourth invitation, more pressing than ever, to come and stay with them for some time. In addition to this, they wrote that they had repeatedly prayed about the matter, and were persuaded that I ought to come. This matter has been to-day a subject for prayer.
September 16. We came this morning to the conclusion that I should go to the Isle of Wight; but we saw not how my wife and child and our servant could accompany me, as we had not sufficient money for travelling expenses; and yet this seemed of importance. The Lord graciously removed the difficulty this evening; for we received, most unexpectedly and unasked for, five pounds and thirteen shillings, which was owed to us, and also, when we had already retired to rest, a letter was brought, containing a present of two pounds. How very, very kind and tender is the Lord!
September 19. This evening we arrived at our friends’ in the Isle of Wight, by whom we were most kindly received.
September 29. Last evening, when I retired from the family, I had a desire to go to rest at once, for I had prayed a short while before; and feeling weak in body, the coldness of the night was a temptation to me to pray no further. However, the Lord did help me to fall upon my knees; and no sooner had I commenced praying than he shone into my soul, and gave me such a spirit of prayer as I had not enjoyed for many weeks. He graciously once more revived his work in my heart. I enjoyed that nearness to God and fervency in prayer, for more than an hour, for which my soul had been panting for many weeks past.