‘I actually don’t think I could. I don’t have the businesswoman persona that you have. I would crumble under the pressure.’
‘Oh shush! Although I would get more done if I didn’t have a child who was as stubborn as hell.’
‘I wonder where she gets that from,’ Nancy said under her breath with a smile.
‘What’s that?’ Harriet questioned, clearly having heard exactly what Nancy had said.
‘I said, are the kids OK?’ She poked out her tongue.
‘Yeah I’m sure you did. They’re fine. How’s Jack doing?’
Nancy’s stomach dropped a little. ‘He’s doing alright, could be better.’
‘School?’
Nancy nodded. ‘He’s just not fitting in. I can’t help but worry that this school isn’t right for him. It breaks my heart every morning when I take him in and he cries because he doesn’t want to be there. I walked past at playtime the other day and he was playing by himself.’
‘Did you ask him about it?’
‘Yeah, he said he likes to be by himself.’
‘Well there you go – as long as he’s not sad about it.’
Nancy exhaled. ‘That’s the thing though; he doesn’t really get the emotions so I’m worried that he doesn’t understand how he’s feeling.’
‘But if he doesn’t feel sad, and he’s OK, surely that’s all you want?’
Nancy nodded. ‘I guess so. He’s apparently not the same in the classroom though, seems to be constantly agitated and emotional, the teacher tells me. I’m going to go in again after the holidays and ask for an update meeting – they need to reassess his plan and see what needs changing. It can’t stay like this.’
‘Chin up, things will be OK. And now you have a holiday to look forward to.’
The doorbell rang and as Nancy stood, she said, ‘I won’t have the chance to look forward to it; it’s the day after tomorrow!’
‘Look, we have to go now because the kids only get two weeks off for Easter so we need to make the most of it.’
Nancy walked to the front door laughing. A holiday seemed like just what she needed right now. Maybe it would be the perfect antidote for her stress? At least she was eating properly again and sleeping a little better. She opened the door half expecting the postman to be there, but instead got the shock of her life.
‘Hi Nance, can we talk?’
Nancy stared back at Pete, frozen to the spot half in surprise and half in frustration that he had chosen this moment to turn up on her doorstep when she’d been trying to get him to come and see Jack for the past year.
‘What do you want, Pete?’
‘Aren’t you going to invite me in?’ He brushed his hand through his dark brown hair, which had grown longer over the past year than she had ever seen it, and leaned on the doorframe, seemingly trying to look more relaxed than he was feeling.
‘Can’t say that I particularly want to,’ she said, but then caught sight of her neighbour in her front garden pretending to be doing some weeding when really she was ear wigging. ‘You’ve got ten minutes.’
The atmosphere between the two of them was tense and things only worsened when Pete walked into the kitchen and was faced with Harriet.
‘What in God’s name are you doing here?’ she scowled, putting her hands onto her hips and frowning at him.
‘Nice to see you too, Harriet.’ Pete forced a strained smile across his face.
‘I didn’t say it was nice to see you. In fact, I feel quite the opposite.’
‘Hari, it’s fine.’ Nancy manoeuvred around her friend and placed a brief hand onto her shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze as she grabbed her cup off the side.
‘It’s bloody well not fine. He thinks he can just walk out on you and Jack and disappear for months on end, ignoring your calls and then swan up on your doorstep like nothing’s happened? I don’t bloody think so.’ She glared at him.
‘Last time I checked, this wasn’t your house or your business, Harriet!’
Harriet marched towards Pete at speed and Nancy quickly put her mug down and stepped into Harriet’s path just as she reached him. ‘And last time I checked, Pete,’ she spat his name viciously, ‘you don’t just abandon your wife and your child the second shit gets hard in life.’
‘OK, OK, enough you two.’ Nancy placed her hand onto Harriet’s shoulder. ‘Let me talk to him and see what the deal is. I’ll call you later and we can talk about the holiday, OK?’
‘Nance, don’t let him wheedle his way—’
‘Hari, I’m fine … honestly.’
Harriet glared at Pete before grabbing her bag and walking out of the kitchen towards the front door.
‘And as for you,’ Nancy pointed at Pete, her expression dropping into a serious tone, ‘don’t you dare think for one second that it is OK to walk into my house and be rude to my friends.’
‘Nancy, this was our house.’
‘Exactly, Pete, this was our house – and then you left.’
They both stood for a second staring at each other and then as her words sank in, Pete admitted defeat and nodded.
Ten minutes later, Nancy had made Pete a coffee and refreshed her own mug and the pair were seated at the table clasping their mugs, neither one making moves to speak. Eventually, Nancy said, ‘So are you going to tell me why you’ve suddenly turned up here after a year of silence or am I supposed to just ignore that part?’ Her anxious heartbeat had still not recovered from the moment she’d opened the door to him.
He exhaled but didn’t shift his glance from the mug of brown liquid in front of him. ‘It’s complicated.’
‘Too damn right, it’s complicated, Pete, because I’m struggling to understand why you would leave us. I tried my best to make everything work, even when things got really tough with Jack but clearly it wasn’t good enough – maybe I wasn’t good enough.’ She looked down at her hands as she spoke, saying the words that she had been thinking for months now.
This time he looked up, sadness etched on his face. ‘Nancy, no! It wasn’t you – you were the best wife.’
‘I can’t have been that good otherwise you wouldn’t have left. No matter how hard life gets, when you have someone you love by your side, you get through it. But you just left. I obviously didn’t do a very good job at being a supportive wife.’
This time he didn’t respond, instead choosing to drop his gaze back down into the mug. Nancy didn’t probe any further because she didn’t want to hear that she was right – even though she knew she was. After a minute, he spoke again. It was barely audible but was still loud enough for Nancy to hear perfectly. ‘It was too hard.’
‘Life is hard.’ She felt her exterior harden slightly. The ‘it’s hard’ line wasn’t going to wash with her. She was too far into protection mode now, especially as she’d had to deal with the last year on her own.
‘It’s easy for you.’
‘How is it easy for me? He’s my son too, I feel how hard it is too, you know!’
‘Yes