Ask any young racing driver and he’ll tell you that the idea of joining Ferrari means everything. That’s the way I felt while racing in Ireland in Formula Ford. It’s something to dream about when you’re struggling along with few opportunities and even less money. Mention Formula 1 and you automatically think of Ferrari. If a driver gets himself into one of the red cars, he has it made.
But when it actually happens, as it did for me when I joined Ferrari in October 1995, the reality is not so difficult to take on board. The point is, I was not as gobsmacked as I thought I would be.
I don’t know whether it’s because I get used to things quickly or that maybe other drivers exaggerate when joining a new team. In my case, I never regard anything like that as a big deal. And yet there was no doubt that signing for Ferrari had to be the biggest deal of my life.
I felt much the same at the end of the first race of the 1996 season in Australia. I finished on the podium but, to be honest, third place in the Ferrari was not much to write home about. It meant nothing. For me, it’s all about doing a really, really good job – and I didn’t feel I had achieved that in Melbourne mainly because the situation was not there to allow me to do a good job.
Anyone could have brought that car home third; the most significant fact was that the F310 had finished at all. It was a minor miracle after the huge dramas we had gone through in the weeks leading up to the start of the season. At one point, after seemingly endless delays and problems, I never thought we would make it to the first race and, if we did, Ferrari would be totally embarrassed. It just goes to show that you certainly can’t take anything for granted in motor racing.
The previous September, for instance, I was absolutely sure I would be spending a third season with the Jordan team in 1996. I didn’t really want to do that, but there seemed to be no other way because of a watertight contract with the team.
It’s true that team boss Eddie Jordan had given me my chance in Formula 1. He had offered me a drive in the 1993 Japanese Grand Prix at Suzuka and I had taken it. I had spent three years racing in Japan so I knew the circuit well. I had also earned quite a bit of money during my time in the Far East – but Eddie Jordan was not exactly offering a similar reward! It was no big deal in every sense. But I can’t deny that it was a good opportunity to establish my name in Formula 1. I managed to do that at Suzuka – although not quite in the way I had expected.
I finished sixth in my first Formula 1 drive and scored a Championship point. Everyone seemed pretty excited about that, mainly because Jordan had been having a poor season and, with my team-mate Rubens Barrichello taking fifth place, this was the first time the team had scored any points in almost a year. But as far as I was concerned, the real excitement had yet to come.
During the race, I had been challenging Damon Hill for fourth place. The track was in the process of drying out after a heavy shower, Damon had changed to slick tyres and I was on wets, which were definitely the thing to have while the track was still slippery. I wanted to make the most of my knowledge of Suzuka because I knew where there was grip to be found and I wanted to pass Hill while the going was good from my point of view.
Leader Ayrton Senna came past and lapped me, but then instead of doing the same to Damon he seemed to become over-cautious. Damon’s car was sliding around quite a bit and Ayrton was not keen to try and pass. But I was. So I overtook Senna and unlapped myself. It was no big deal … at least, not for me.
It turned out that Senna was mad as hell over that manoeuvre. Nobody had dared to do such a thing to him before. After the race he came down to see me, which was a bit difficult because he wasn’t exactly sure what I looked like. He soon found out, however, and we had a discussion, of sorts.
I explained things the way I saw them; I didn’t feel there was any need to apologise because I had done nothing wrong. The race stewards had seen no reason to take any action but Senna was not impressed. Apparently I had not shown enough respect. Fair enough; that was his point of view. Case closed.
Except he wanted to leave me a reminder with his fist. The blow knocked me to the floor and onto the front pages of the world’s newspapers. Everyone made a meal of the episode but I couldn’t see what all the fuss was about. The best bit, I thought, was that Eddie Jordan had missed the drama in his own backyard. Eddie can’t resist a microphone or a television camera and, of course, as soon as the news got out, the Jordan garage was inundated. But Eddie wasn’t there. He had cleared off on holiday and missed the chance of an important sound-bite or two.
I signed a three-year contract with Jordan at the beginning of 1994 and settled down to learn about Formula 1. Some of the lessons were to be pretty painful. At the first race in Brazil, I became involved in a four-car shunt. I won’t go into too much detail now, except to say that the accident had nothing to do with me. Jos Verstappen caused it while trying to overtake as we came across two cars, one of which was in trouble and slowing. Verstappen could see what was going on, and yet he still kept his foot down – even when he went onto the grass. Everyone else was avoiding the accident when Verstappen lost control on the grass, came right into me – and off we all went. It was a huge shunt.
The race officials decided I should take the wrap and I was eventually banned for three races. It was a hell of a penalty. Some time later, there was a bit of back-pedalling by certain people in authority but, at the end of the day, the driver is powerless. There’s nothing you can do; you just have to suffer the consequences. That incident really set me back. I missed out on the experience of racing; there is, after all, no substitute for miles behind the wheel. Something like that is bound to affect your confidence, no matter how hard you try to shrug it off.
I spent the rest of the 1994 season learning, picking up points here and there and generally rebuilding my confidence and my reputation. By the time I was half way through 1995, I knew it was time to leave Jordan.
I told Eddie Jordan that, if his team stayed as it was, I would not be driving for him the following year. My wages for 1996 were to be based on the results achieved in 1995. But my car kept breaking down, so on that basis the contract was totally unfair; I had missed out on prize money in 1995 and now it was going to affect my earnings in 1996. Of course, Eddie didn’t agree; he said it was normal. There was to be no arguing with him. At that point, I decided to look elsewhere.
At the second race of the season in Argentina, I had met Luca di Montezemolo, the President of Ferrari. I had qualified fourth in Buenos Aires and Luca came to see me. He said ‘Well done’, or words to that effect. Then he said he heard that I had a Ferrari road car. He had been told that I had tested various sports cars and none of them had been in the same league as my Ferrari GTO. I said that was correct. I had written favourably about it – so perhaps he ought to give me a discount on spare parts! He seemed to like that. I’m still waiting for the discount…
But contact had been made. Not long after, Mike Greasley, who was handling my contractual affairs, spoke to Niki Lauda. The former world champion was acting as advisor to Ferrari and he was interested in finding out about my position with Jordan. My contract had a buy-out clause. When Lauda heard how much Ferrari would have to pay, he said it was ridiculous. So that seemed to be the end of the matter.
After my fruitless discussions with EJ, however, I was taking a serious look around. I talked to Tom Walkinshaw who, at the time, was effectively running the Ligier team. He made Jordan an offer – which was rejected largely because the money was not right and also because a move by me from Jordan to Ligier would be seen as a slap in the face for EJ. He knew people would ask why one of his drivers would want to leave and join a team which was no better. He also knew I would probably tell anyone who asked!
Meanwhile, I had been tipped off to keep in touch with Ferrari. As autumn approached, things began to move quickly. Ferrari were definitely interested