And she feared for her vows. More than anything else, she feared for her vows.
He paused once, while he was running lightly up the stairs as Alys came down, waited on the step beside her and put a careless finger under her chin, turning her face to the arrow-slit for light.
‘You’re beautiful,’ he said. It was as if he were measuring her looks for fault. ‘Your hair is coming through golden.’
Alys had a mop-head of golden-brown curls, still too short to fasten back so she wore her hair as a child, loose around her face.
‘What age are you?’ he asked.
She sensed the quickening of his interest, so tangible that she almost smelled it.
‘Fourteen,’ she said.
‘Liar,’ he replied evenly. ‘What age?’
‘Sixteen,’ she said sullenly. She did not take her watchful eyes off his face.
He nodded. ‘Old enough,’ he said. ‘Come to my room tonight,’ he said abruptly. ‘At midnight.’
Alys’ pale face was impassive, her blue eyes blank.
‘Did you hear me?’ he asked, slightly surprised.
‘Yes, my lord,’ Alys said carefully. ‘I heard you.’
‘And you know where my room is?’ he asked, as if that could be the only obstacle. ‘In the round tower on the floor above my father. When you leave his room tonight, take the stairs upwards to me instead of down to the hall. And I shall have some wine for you, little Alys, and some sweetmeats, and some gentle play.’
Alys said nothing, keeping her eyes down. She could feel the heat of her cheeks and the thud of her heart beating.
‘Do you know what you make me think of?’ Hugo asked confidentially.
‘What?’ Alys asked, betrayed into curiosity.
‘Fresh cream,’ he said seriously.
Alys’ eyes flew to his face. ‘Why?’ she asked.
‘Every time I see you all I can think of is fresh cream. All I think of is pouring cream all over your body and licking it off,’ he said.
Alys gasped and pulled away from him as if his touch had scorched her. He laughed aloud at her shocked face.
‘That’s settled then,’ he said easily. He smiled at her, his heart-turning merry smile, and swung around and took the steps upwards two at a time. She heard him whistling a madrigal as he went, joyous as a winter robin.
Alys leaned back against the cold stones and did not feel their chill. She felt desire, hot and dangerous and exciting, in every inch of her body. She gripped her lower lip between her teeth but she could not stop herself smiling. ‘No,’ she said sternly. But her cheeks burned.
Alys knew she needed to see Morach and she had her chance that afternoon. Lord Hugh wanted a message taken to Bowes Castle and Alys offered to carry it. ‘If I am delayed I shall stay the night with my kinswoman,’ she said. ‘I should like to see her for a little while, and I need some herbs.’
The old lord looked at her and smiled his slow smile. ‘But you’ll come back,’ he said.
Alys nodded. ‘You know I’ll come back,’ she said. ‘There’s no life for me on the moor now, that life is closed to me. And the one I had before. It’s like a journey down a chamber with doors that shut behind me. Whenever I find some safety I have to move on, and the old life is taken from me.’
He nodded. ‘Best find yourself a man and close all the doors for good; those before you, and those behind you,’ he said.
Alys shook her head. ‘I won’t wed,’ she said.
‘Because of your vows?’ he asked.
‘Yes …’ Alys started and then she bit the words back. ‘I’ve taken no vows, my lord,’ she said smoothly. ‘It’s just that I am one of those women who cannot abide bedding. It goes with the skill of herbs. My cousin Morach lives alone.’
Lord Hugh coughed and spat towards the fire which burned in the corner of his room, smoke trailing through the arrow-slit above it. ‘I guessed some time ago you were a runaway nun,’ he said conversationally. ‘Your Latin is very weak in profane language, very strong for sacred texts. Your hair was shaved, and you have that appetite – like all nuns – for the finest things.’ He laughed harshly. ‘Did you think, little Sister Blue-eyes, that I have not seen how you stroke fine linen, how you love the light from wax candles, how you preen in your red gown and watch the light glint on the silver thread?’
Alys said nothing. Her pulse was racing but she kept her face serene.
‘You’re safe with me,’ Lord Hugh said. ‘Father Stephen is mad for the new ways and the new Church – he’s a fanatical reformer, a holy man. Hugo loves the new Church because he sees the gains he can make: the reduction of the Prince Bishops, fines from the monastery lands, the power that we can now claim – us peers working with the Crown – and the spiritual lords cast down.’
He paused and gave her a brief smile. ‘But I am cautious,’ he said slowly. ‘These turnabouts can happen more than once in a lifetime. It matters not to me whether there is a picture or two in a church, whether I eat flesh or fish, whether I pray to God in Latin or English. What matters more is the Lordship of Castleton and how we weather these years of change.
‘I won’t betray you. I won’t insist that I hear you take the vow of loyalty to the King, I won’t have you stripped and flogged. I won’t have you examined for heresy and when you fail given to the soldiers for their sport.’
Alys scarcely registered the reprieve.
‘Or at any rate,’ the old lord amended, ‘not yet. Not while you remember that you are mine. My servant. My vassal. Mine in word and body and deed.’
Alys inclined her head to show that she was listening. She said nothing.
‘And if you serve me well I shall keep you safe, maybe even smuggle you away, out of the country, safe to an abbey in France. How would that be?’
Alys laid her hand at the base of her throat. She could feel her pulse hammering against her palm. ‘As you wish, my lord,’ she said steadily. ‘I am your servant.’
‘Fancy an abbey in France?’ the old lord asked pleasantly.
Alys nodded dumbly, choked with hope.
‘I could send you to France, I could give you safe conduct on your journey, give you a letter of introduction to an abbess, explaining your danger and telling her that you are a true daughter of her Church,’ the old lord said easily. ‘I could give you a dowry to take to the convent with you. Is that what it takes to buy your loyalty?’
‘I am your faithful servant,’ Alys said breathlessly. ‘But I would thank you if you would send me to a new home, abroad.’
The old lord nodded, measuring her. ‘And serve me without fail until then, as a fee for your passage,’ he said.
Alys nodded. ‘Whatever you command.’
‘You’ll need to stay a virgin I suppose. They won’t accept you in the nunnery otherwise. Has Hugo been tugging at your skirts yet?’
‘Yes,’ Alys said precisely.
‘What did you tell him?’
‘I