As authors, I think we always write about the ideas that fascinate us, the unanswered questions, life’s small mysteries, and my second novel, Three Things About Elsie, explores something I’ve often thought about: how the smallest decisions can make the biggest difference to our lives – and the lives of those around us.
A postcard about a first aid course, pinned in a newsagent’s window, led me to a degree in medicine. A chance tweet about a mentoring programme for writers began my journey to becoming a published author. Seemingly small moments which, further down the road, turned out to be very big moments indeed.
These moments not only change the direction of our lives, they also have the ability to change our very sense of who we are. The postcard didn’t just eventually take me to medical school, it gave me a chance to try something I’d always thought I wasn’t smart enough to do. The tweet I saw travelling through my timeline didn’t hand me a publishing contract, it handed me an opportunity to gather a little of my self-belief. Small moments which allowed me to rewrite my own story.
No matter how often we change our stories though, our past self is always contained within our older self, and I wondered what advice I would give the younger version of me, if I could travel back in time. The girl collecting her A-level results. The girl who pined for a boy who didn’t pine for her. The girl who stared at a postcard in a newsagent’s window. What three things would I tell my younger self, if I had the chance? I decided to ask the same question to the wisest people I know – people from many different backgrounds, whose stories, lives and friendships continue to inspire me – and their answers to that question are contained within these pages. Some of the responses made me laugh out loud, some of them moved me to tears, and quite a few managed to do a little of both. Everyone very generously gave their time and their words for free, and we released this to coincide with exam results day (when everyone could do with more than a little moral support!)
I hope you find their advice as brilliant and inspirational as I do, and who knows, you may find a small moment of your own, hidden away within the pages of this book.
Thank you so much for reading!
Joanna Cannon
IGNASI AGELL, CONSULTANT PSYCHIATRIST
1. On many occasions I have struggled between the yes’s and the no’s, and not always remembered a lesson from the past; that renewing your dreams is renewing your sorrows. A battle between light and darkness. My young self, I would tell to be curious; to live in the light of the dreams, because in darkness we can’t see our shadows; to be authentic to overcome those shadows; and don’t be a prisoner of your own opinions.
2. I was born with a club foot, to parents that were both deaf. I was always surprised when others asked how it was for me to have a bad foot, or to live with deaf parents, as for me this was my normal, my baseline. Later in life, other things happened; better or worse, and I learnt never to be defined by them, even when they became significant elements of my chronological life. We all appear to look for certainties in life, when our secret lives are made of little things. My young self I would tell not to be afraid and to become a gatherer of little instants.
3. Finally, to be kind.
SUE ARMSTRONG, LITERARY AGENT, C+W AGENCY
1. Please don’t allow shyness to get in the way. You miss out on some incredible opportunities to meet iconic people and do once-in-a-life-time things all because you felt too shy to step forward. Put that feeling in a box and go forth and conquer!
2. That friend you adore? Keep him close. It may be an impossible situation but try to find a way, because 20 years later you’ll still miss him.
3. Tips for uni: Jacob’s Cream Crackers are not diet biscuits; DO NOT let that woman cut you a fringe; and remember night-time is for sleeping, daytime is for working, not the other way around (#Insomnia).
HANNAH BECKERMAN, AUTHOR and JOURNALIST
1. You’re not the only one who feels the way you do
Everyone around you seems so happy, content, confident. They seem comfortable in their own skin in a way you don’t. You imagine that you’re the only person in the world who feels unhappy, depressed, unsure of herself. Trust me: you are not. Some people are just better at hiding their insecurities than you are. And you’re so adept at hiding yours that many people look at you and have no idea how you’re really feeling. But in time, you are going to find people to trust with these feelings. And even though they may never disappear altogether, you’ll find that their power over you lose its hold once you dare to acknowledge them, articulate them, and share them.
2. Ditch the friends who make you feel rubbish
There’s always one (or two, or three). Those friends who make you feel like you’re not worthwhile. The ones who make you feel ugly, stupid, unlovable, unloved. They make comments that are supposed to be funny but are actually belittling. When you tell them something good that’s happened to you, they’ve always done something better. In groups, they talk over you, steal your punchlines, make you feel invisible.
Ditch these people