FOX: What am I when?
GOULD: What are you, I was saying, if you're just a slave to commerce?
FOX: If I'm just a slave to commerce?
GOULD: Yes.
FOX: I'm nothing.
GOULD: No.
FOX: You're absolutely right.
GOULD: You got to have fun. You know why?
FOX: Okay: why?
GOULD: Because, or else you'll die, and people will say “he never had any fun.”
FOX: How close are you to Ross?
GOULD: How close am I to Ross . . .? I don't know How close should I be?
FOX: I have to ask you something.
GOULD (pause): Go ahead, Charl.
FOX: You wanna’ greenlight a picture? What's your deal, what's your new deal?
GOULD: What's my new deal, that's all you can talk about?
FOX: What's your new deal?
GOULD: Alright. Over ten mil I need Ross's approval. Under ten mil, I can greenlight it. So what. (Pause.)
FOX: This morning, Bob.
GOULD: . . . Yes . . .?
FOX: This morning a man came to me.
GOULD: . . . a man came to you. Whaddayou, already, you're here to “Promote” me . . .?
FOX: Bob . . .
GOULD: You here to promote me? Charl? Because, Charl, one thing I don't need . . .
FOX: Bob.
GOULD: When everybody in this jolly town is tryin’ to promote me, do you wanna see my messages . . . ?
FOX: Bob.
GOULD: “Get Him While He's Hot” . . .
FOX: Yes, yes, but. ..
GOULD: My good, my “good” friend, Charles Fox . . .
FOX: Bob . . .
GOULD: That's why we have “channels.”
FOX: Uh huh.
GOULD: All these “little” people out there, that we see. Y'unnerstand? Fellow asks “what are they there for?” Well, Charl, We Don't Know. But we think, you give the thing to your boy, gives it to my boy, these people get to eat, they don't have to go beg, and get in everybody's face the airport the whole time. This morning the phone won't stop ringing. Do you know who's calling? Everybody says they met me in Topeka, 1962, and do I want to make their movie. Guys want me to do remakes of films haven't been made yet.
FOX: . . . Huh, huh . . .
GOULD: I'm drowning in “coverage.” (He picks up a script and reads:) “The Story of a Horse and the Horse Who Loved Him.” (He drops script.). . . Give me a breather from all those fine folk suddenly see what a great “man” I am. N'when I do return my calls, Charl, do you know what I'll tell those people?
FOX: No.
GOULD: I'm going to tell them “Go through Channels.” This protects me from them. And from folk, fine as they are, like you, Charl, when you come to me for favors. Or did you come up here to congratulate me on my new promotion?
FOX: Congratulations.
GOULD: Do I deserve it?
FOX: Yes. You do, Bob.
GOULD: Why?
FOX: Because you're a prince among men and you're Yertle the Turtle.
GOULD: Alright then, that's enough. What did you bring me?
FOX: This morning, Bob.
GOULD: Yes?
FOX: This morning Doug Brown came to me.
GOULD: . . . Doug Brown.
FOX (pause): He came to my house Bob. How would you like . . . How would you like for Doug Brown to “cross the street” to do a picture for us? (Pause.) Bob? How would you like, a script that I got him. He's nuts for it, he's free, we could start to shoot next month, I have his word and he'll come to the studio, and do the film for us. Doug Brown will cross the street and do a film for us next month.
GOULD (picks up phone): Get me Ross. (Pause.)
FOX: . . . do you see what I'm telling you?
GOULD: . . . he came to your house . . .
FOX: . . . can you believe what I'm saying to you . . .?
GOULD: Douggie Brown. (Into phone:) Ross (Pause) Richard Ross . . . no, no, no, don't look in the book . . . there's a button on the console . . . Richard R . . . just
push the button on the. . . (Pause. ) There's a button on the console . . . Richard Ross . . . just . .. Thank you. (Hangs up the phone. Pause.) Are you alright?
FOX: I'm fine. I'm fine, I just need coffee.
GOULD: We'll get it for you. Tell mmm . . .
FOX: Alright, I, this is some time ago.
GOULD: . . . uh huh . . .
FOX: That I get the script to Brown . . .
GOULD: What script. . .?
FOX: You don't know it, a prison script . . .
GOULD (simultaneously with “script"): One of ours . . .?
FOX: I found it in the file. I loved it . . . all the time I'm thinking . . .
GOULD: Uh huh . . .
FOX: How to do this script, I, one day . . .
GOULD: Uh huh . . .
FOX: . . . so . . .
GOULD: So, you give the script to Brown . . .
FOX: Not “him,” his . . .
GOULD: Uh huh . . .
FOX: . . . his . . .
GOULD: . . . I know . . .
FOX: His “guy.”
GOULD: Yes.
FOX: Gives Douggie the script . . . (Phone rings. GOULD picks up the phone. )
GOULD (into phone): Yes. Thank you. (Hangs up.) Ross'll get back to us . . .
FOX: . . . His guy gives Douggie the scri. . .
GOULD: He gives Douggie the script.
FOX: Yes.
GOULD: Mmm . . .
FOX: Months ago, alright? I don't know. Today, alright. . .? Today. (Pause.) I'm having coffee . . .
GOULD: Umm hmmm . . .
FOX: Who drives up?
GOULD: . . . coffee at your house . . .
FOX: Who drives up?
GOULD: Douggie Brown.
FOX: Douglas Brown drives up to my house. (Pause.) He says “I Want To Do Your Script. I've got this other thing to deal with, and we'll settle it tomorrow Call me ten o'clock tomorrow morning. I'll come in and sign up.” (Phone rings.)
GOULD (into phone): Hello . . . who? No calls. No calls. Just Richard Ross. And we need coffee . . . okay? Got it. . .? (Hangs up.)
FOX: . . . cross the street to shoot it. . .? And he says “why not.” (Pause.)
GOULD: . . . huh . . .
FOX: Huh . . .?
GOULD: . . . He'd come over here to shoot it. . .
FOX: Sonofabitch like out of some damn fairytale.
GOULD: