“Yeah, I’ll just have to check with David if he’s free,” Mira stumbled out, mentally reefing a grip on herself.
“Awwww please girl. That man’s so smitten it’s like you’ve got your own personal puppy.”
“Yeah always sniffing around my arse,” Mira shot back then pulled herself up. That sounded bitchy.
“I didn’t mean it like that,” she tried to retract.
“Oh come on! You love it. He’s surely got to be the most attentive fuccer in the universe.”
“I wouldn’t know. Honestly Sunny, we haven’t yet. I’m over rushing shit.”
“Yeah me too,” Sunny almost sung back through the phone, “When it’s special, it’s worth savouring every step.”
Who is this??!
“Yeah,” Mira blurted back, but that wasn’t what she’d meant at all.
“So how ‘bout that bar Flying Phoenix? You said it was mad.”
“Yeah but…”
“Mira! You can’t let one dick keep you from going places for fuccs sakes, like you’re on a restraining order with life.”
Sunny was right. If Mira let her painful memories of Rex dictate her existence she may as well be a hermit.
“You’re right, and it’s an awesome place. Let’s do it.”
“Cool, about 8?”
“Perfect.”
But as Mira hung up a shiver tingled down her spine. She was sure she heard Miracle Man chortling, as he sat in the cosmos in his deck chair. And he never turned up unless the Universe had its ladle out ready to stir your pot.
Mira sniffed out trying to dismiss her premonition jitters.
The rest of the week went along pretty much as per normal.
Mira met with David for dinner after work on Wednesday. It was a really fancy restaurant that David had picked in the city. He always took Mira to super expensive, fancy restaurants; as casually as Mira might suggest fish and chips on the beach. It honestly made Mira feel nauseous. She detested to her bones not paying her own way and there was no way she could afford to eat at these places every week. David paid every time and didn’t blink over it, like he couldn’t comprehend her point-of-view. And besides not paying, which irked Mira’s soul to no end, she could just never relax in those places. She felt beady eyes on her the whole time, judging her budget shoes and frizzy hair. Mira was always neat and clean, obsessively so; but she wasn’t money, and money could sniff out broke-ass a mile away, like someone had stepped in dog shit.
And on gawd! If Mira had thought Jen was loaded. David’s family money made Jen’s 18th birthday party of faced-painted Indian elephants, flocking the grounds near the pavilion; look like a drunk clown at a one year old’s backyard birthday barbecue.
It made Mira feel sick just thinking about it.
She’d gone over for dinner at David’s one time. Mira had honestly put in so much effort, which was out of character. Jen lent her a dress, she spent over an hour on her hair and make-up; and even took over the most beautiful, huge bunch of peonies.
But the minute those grand, double doors opened; Mira had just felt like a scrub who’d picked some flowers out of the neighbours garden on the way.
David’s parents acted very politely, but when you can see energy, you can see people’s judgement and disappointment radiating out of them like a thick cloud. Mira wasn’t good enough for David, she felt it. Regardless, she wore a bright steel smile the whole night, because they weren’t to know that she knew the truth.
Mira sat fidgeting uncomfortably in the restaurant and picking paint self-consciously out of her nails as David complained about upcoming exams. He was at the end of his masters in economics, and was going into the family business full time as soon as he was finished at the end of the year. That’s why his family tolerated Mira for now. She was just a stop-gap in their eyes.
…and maybe they had a point.
Although David complained to no end about his parents not understanding him, and not listening to what he wanted; Mira also saw the lack of conviction in his heart. He wasn’t ready to rock the family boat, maybe he never would be, and he wasn’t half as discontent as he made out - she could feel it. He had a family heart and staying loyal to his family was apart of his happiness. She didn’t exactly need to be a mind reader to see that, but it didn’t hurt either.
So David was complaining about exams coming up, and apologising to Mira that he would be busy for a few weeks.
“That’t ok,” Mira said too brightly, then she back-peddled seeing the disheartened ash flurries in his energy shift.
“I mean, don’t feel bad,” Mira reached across and took his hand, “I’m busy too. I’ve got the court case coming up.”
Mira’s guts churned.
“I thought you weren’t going to testify?” David rebutted, getting protective rhinoceros-like horns surging up through his aura.
Mira shrugged, “With me as witness it’s an open and close case. I’m still not 100% about it to be honest, but if it means it’s over. Anyway, there’s some preparation involved. So by the time it’s done and dusted then your exams will be finished. Perfect timing,” Mira smiled.
It was strained, like those smiles you see on kids’ faces in Santa pictures when they’re terrified for their life but trying their darnedest to suck it up while their parents assure them from a good two metres away.
“We should go away afterwards!” David beamed with sparkling new epiphany enveloping him.
Mira grimaced, retracting her hand.
“I know you wanna see your Mum and Lai settled and don’t want to be too far from them yet. Even a long weekend. To celebrate. Where do you wanna go?”
Mira shrugged.
She didn’t feel ready for that. But they’d been dating two months already, how much longer could she expect to fend him off for?
“It’s just near Christmas, that’ll be expensive,” Mira tried.
David looked at Mira completely blankly.
She rolled her eyes inside, he didn’t get it.
“Pop’s got a beach house down the coast? We could stay there if it’s free,” Mira conceded.
David shook his head “Nah, how ‘bout the Maldives? It’s perfect for a short trip. Nothing to do but stay in bed.”
Mira swallowed down bile.
“I can’t afford it,” She blurted out truthfully.
“How many times do I have to tell you?” David asked, but not unkindly, “You’re my girl. You don’t have to worry about money.”
Just then they both looked up to the waiter, standing over them looking down his nose at Mira’s paint-splattered hair.
Mira’s guts churned. She hated the way she had no hope of ever keeping up with David.
He didn’t see it, but Mira wasn’t anyone’s charity. Never had been and never would be.
Everything she had she earned. It was important to her.
Not that David didn’t understand work ethic. He got perfect marks in all his subjects at university. That’s not easy, no matter how much money or brains God gave you. He worked in his family business part time, as his dad was training him to take over the reigns more seriously next year. David