She wanted to be consumed by him.
Without warning, he broke away, breathing heavily, his eyes smoldering for her. A pulse leaped along the hard line of his jaw. “Vanessa, go,” he rasped.
She swallowed over the lump in her throat. “I—”
“Go.”
She didn’t need to be told a second time. Whirling around, she ran back to her apartment as fast as her legs would take her. When she finally closed the door behind her, she sank to her knees and brought her hand to her mouth. Dear God, what had she done? Everything she’d believed about herself and the type of woman she was had just been proven wrong.
She had betrayed Mike.
Worse. She’d kissed another man and found something in that kiss she’d never found in the two years of loving her husband.
Lust.
She had wanted to melt in Kirk’s arms and have him carry her off to bed and a night of whirlwind passion and blessed satiation. Except that Kirk hadn’t given her the chance, had he? No thanks to her, she thought with self-deprecation.
So shouldn’t that make her happy?
Yes.
Why, then, did she have an inexplicable feeling of emptiness? As if she’d lost something important she’d never really had.
Kirk had a raw feeling in his gut as he let himself into his motel room. The party was over for him in more ways than one. The woman he was so attracted to … the woman he’d wanted to make his own … was not only a grieving widow but a mother as well.
Why the friggin’ hell hadn’t someone thought to mention it yesterday? He wouldn’t have come here tonight. He wouldn’t have gotten involved. Now he had the taste of Vanessa Hamilton in his mouth.
And the imprint of her body on his clothes.
Dammit, the last thing he wanted to see right now was his reflection in the mirror. He was wet all the way from his blazer and shirt down to the front of his trousers, the dampness touching his skin through the material. His pulse quickened. Just looking at himself reminded him what she’d felt like in his arms. Soft and willowy, her curves flush against him.
Not that he’d forget in any hurry.
Just like he wouldn’t forget she was a young widow with a small child. No question now why she’d been fighting his advances. She was still getting over the death of her husband. And he intended to leave her to it.
Of course all that begged the question.
If she hadn’t felt anything for him, what exactly had she been fighting?
Three
Vanessa had a very restless night, so the next morning the last thing she wanted to hear when she picked up the office telephone was her mother-in-law’s voice on the other end of the line. Guilt immediately washed over her. She’d been married to this woman’s son—and she’d kissed another man last night.
“How is my little Joshua doing?”
Vanessa shuddered. The thrice-weekly phone calls were getting too much. And he wasn’t her Joshua at all.
“He’s fine, Grace,” she said, keeping her tone neutral.
“We miss him.”
“I know you do.” They could at least agree on that.
“Did you receive the parcel of special baby cereal I sent for him? I know you like feeding him that cheap brand but I’m told this one is the most nutritional for a child his age.”
Vanessa held back a wince. The baby cereal she fed Josh was a good brand off the supermarket shelf. And it wasn’t too cheap either. “Yes, it arrived. Thank you.”
“And did the clothes fit him? I bought them from one of the best stores in the city. I don’t want him looking like nobody cares about him.”
Vanessa swallowed back a retort at the dig. “The clothes fit just fine, Grace.” They were expensive and nice for going out, but not for everyday use.
“Good.”
All at once Vanessa was aware of Linda in the reception area. They knew each other so well and it was hard keeping anything from her cousin. Linda had already mentioned how she’d seen Kirk leave the party with her last night, and how he hadn’t come back, but there had been no insinuation in the comment, despite her curiosity. Linda knew she didn’t bed-hop.
“We have some exciting news,” Grace’s voice cut across her thoughts. “Nadine is pregnant.”
“Really?” She was genuinely happy for her sister-in-law. “That’s wonderful. You must be pleased.”
“We are.” Then Grace gave a shaky sigh. “If only Michael was here. He’d be over the moon for his sister.”
Vanessa took a breath. “Yes.” Mike had loved his sister.
How close was Kirk to his own sister? she wondered, then forced herself to dismiss her thoughts. What Kirk Deverill and his family were to each other didn’t matter to her. She just hoped he checked out of his room and went home soon. It put her on edge knowing he was here in the motel somewhere.
“Grace, I must go now.” She listened further. “Yes, I’ll give Josh a big hug from you and Rupert.” She hung up and took a deep breath to steady herself. Her in-laws always made her uneasy.
Linda came to the doorway. “She never asks how you’re doing, does she? It’s always about Josh.”
Vanessa shrugged. “She knows I’m okay.”
“You’re too generous.”
Vanessa rather thought Grace would say she wasn’t generous enough, especially where Josh was concerned. The older couple would take him from her in a heartbeat.
“Generous or not, I’d better get back to cleaning those motel rooms. It was a full house last night and—”
“I’ve got it!” Linda said, springing forward into the office. “Oh, why didn’t I think of this before?” She broke into a big smile. “You’re coming with us to Queensland, sweetie.”
Vanessa came around the desk. “What?”
“I can’t let you and Josh go back to your in-laws. We’ll find you an apartment close to us and I’ll look after Josh if you need to get a job.”
Vanessa’s heart thudded for a moment before reality set in. “Thanks for thinking of me, Linda, but it wouldn’t be fair on either you or Hugh. Or Toby. You’re starting a new life. You’ll have responsibilities that go with Hugh’s new job as caretaker. You don’t need me adding to the mix.”
Linda made a dismissive gesture. “You wouldn’t be adding to anything.”
“And what if you’re pregnant?You told me you had terrible morning sickness with Toby. Can you imagine looking after two infants as well as feeling nauseated and off-color?” Vanessa shook her head. “No, it’s a lovely offer but I can’t accept.”
Her cousin’s face began to fall. “Well, perhaps you could put Josh in day care. I know it’s not ideal but—”
“I don’t think I can afford an apartment as well as day care,” Vanessa