Long after Bastien fell asleep Ana lay awake, desperately trying to stem the fear that she’d just let herself in for a whole load of heartbreak by admitting her feelings.
Deep inside she knew they’d come a long way from sixteen years ago.
What terrified her was that Bastien would never take that last step into love.
‘BASTIEN, I’M NOT SURE what’s going on here.’
‘What’s going on is that I want you. You want me too. Stay with me.’
Ana replayed their simple yet life-changing morning-after conversation as she rose from the bed and walked towards the log fire in the luxurious log cabin Bastien had brought her to in Chamonix.
She had been like a prisoner granted a last-minute stay of execution, and her ecstatic, ‘Yes!’ had been lost beneath the onslaught of his hungry kisses.
He’d flown them here by helicopter and that ‘yes’ had echoed throughout the passing days. They spent the mornings skiing and doing her lessons. More than once his patience and gentle attention had brought tears to her eyes. The afternoons, evenings and long nights were spent making love in front of the roaring fire.
A deep blush stung her cheeks as she recalled Bastien asking if she now had a favourite position. She’d felt decidedly wanton as she’d demonstrated which position brought her the most pleasure.
‘I can see your blush from here.’
He stood in the bathroom doorway, naked except for the towel he was using on his wet hair.
‘It’s the fire,’ she responded, unable to stop her eyes devouring his perfect male form. He dropped the towel and strode towards her. His teasing grin stopped her heart moments before it began to thunder when he captured her mouth in a slow, devastating kiss.
‘Yes, it must be. Because you’re all hot and bothered.’ His smile deepened.
‘I’m not bothered,’ she answered feebly as his hands closed over her breasts. His thumbs played over her nipples. Ana swayed towards him, helpless against the drowning rush of love.
But that love was tainted with a niggle of fear that wouldn’t go away, a fear that her love would never be fully returned. Sure, he worshipped her body with an intensity that took her breath away, but her confession of love had never been returned. And she’d begun to notice his shuttered expression each time she confessed it.
The need to ask him hovered on her lips as he took her in his arms. Gathering her courage, she leaned back and looked into his eyes.
‘Bastien...’
He rested his forehead against hers. ‘Unless we want to be trapped here for the next few days we really must leave now.’
Heavy snow had been forecast, and while the thought of being snowed in with Bastien for the foreseeable future held intense appeal, the spectre of her trial loomed.
They hadn’t talked about it, but it was there at the back of her mind, growing larger with each passing day.
‘Hey, you’re biting your lip again. What’s wrong?’
‘It’s nothing.’ She tried to step away from him, but he held on to her.
Tender fingers brushed her cheek. ‘It’s not nothing. Tell me.’
Deciding to shelve the matter troubling her heart for now, in favour of the matter in her mind, she murmured, ‘It’s the trial. I’m scared.’
He pulled her closer and sealed her lips with a gentle kiss. ‘I didn’t want to jump the gun until I was absolutely sure, but I heard from my investigators a couple of days ago.’
Alarm spiked through her. ‘And?’
‘It’s not your mother,’ he replied.
A burden she hadn’t even known she carried was lifted off her shoulders as relief swamped her. The tears that seemed to hover close to the surface of her emotions nowadays prickled her eyes.
‘Thank you for telling me.’ She gave a small laugh. ‘You must think I’m hugely irrational when it comes to Lily. But she’s been texting me the last few days.’ She’d received many texts from her mother, the last one with a request to see Ana when she returned to London. ‘If we can salvage something from our messy relationship...’
‘I don’t think you’re irrational. It’s difficult to believe the worst of a parent. And I think we both know what can be salvaged from messy relationships,’ he replied.
His voice was solemn, but Ana noticed it contained none of the hard edge of before.
‘As for the trial—my investigators will know who the culprit is very shortly. Don’t worry about it. Whatever happens I’ll protect you, Ana. I promise you.’
Her heart lurched at his words. She paused, then decided to come clean. ‘I’m not dead certain, but I think it’s Simone.’
His mouth compressed and his arms tightened around her. ‘So do I. My people are tracking some video camera footage. We’ll have an answer soon. I’m sorry.’
She’d refused to accept that Simone would stoop to such levels, but when she let herself really think about it something about her roommate’s perpetual giddy state rang false.
She nodded, her heart sick with sadness. ‘I need to go back to London.’
‘We’ll go together.’
Joy flared inside her, but she was too afraid to give it full flight. Despite the certainty that they’d put the past behind them, that all the old wounds had been cauterised, Ana couldn’t get past the feeling that Bastien might never love her as she loved him. She’d still take being with him over losing him completely, but she needed some head space to get her heart to accept it.
‘I can do this on my own. You don’t have to come with me.’
He trailed a hand down her cheek, then winked at her. ‘Did you forget that where you go, I go? After all, I still have to ensure you don’t abscond the minute my back is turned.’
She quirked a brow and attempted a smile despite the lingering ache in her heart. ‘You left me for almost a week and I was there when you got back.’
He sobered. ‘Oui, you were. And I can’t express how much that meant to me.’
She rose on tiptoe, helplessly pressing her lips against his.
With a groan he deepened the kiss, momentarily silencing her doubts.
Bastien’s feeling were deep enough...
When he lifted his head, glanced at the clock and imperiously announced that they had some time after all, she let herself melt into him.
* * *
‘Wake up, cherie, we’re here,’ a deep voice murmured in her ear.
Ana prised herself away from where she’d fallen asleep on Bastien’s shoulder on the way from the airport.
She straightened and glanced out of her window at a grey and gloomy London. After surrendering her heart to the Château D’Or, the two-bedroom maisonette she shared with Simone in South London looked dismal and almost alien. It would never be home to her again.
The driver pulled up on the kerb. Bastien started to open the door. She stayed him with a hand on his arm.
‘Do you mind if I do this on my own?’
His