Alistair scrubbed his body with a towel and put on clean clothes. Somehow a trace of the river still remained, but if he ignored it then it would probably go away. His eyes still stung a little, and he blinked as he picked up the slip of paper that Raina had left.
Raina Elliot... He noticed that she was using her maiden name now. That wasn’t much of a surprise, particularly since her niece’s surname was Elliot too. If nothing else it sent a message for the little girl who was now her daughter.
‘Raina Duvall. You like it...?’
He’d whispered the words in her ear as they’d danced together on their wedding night, and she’d smiled up at him.
‘I love it. What else do you think I married you for?’
He’d known then that there had been many other things. Love had just about covered it. True love. Devoted love. Making love...
And when he’d given his name to her, he’d suddenly begun to like it a lot more. Up until then it had just been something he’d inherited from his father, along with a chunk of DNA and a propensity to spend all his energies at work.
But Raina had taken the name and made it hers. She had been a creature of warm summer days who’d left the taste of cool raindrops on his lips. Her ability to occasionally thunder and roar had all been a part of her free spirit, and when the storm had passed, everything would be washed clean. Raina had shown her feelings in a way that he’d never been able to, and that was what had broken them apart.
That, and Alistair’s failure. He hadn’t known his father all that well, but his mother had always told him that he was a lot like him. Being like his father meant he’d be a good provider, Alistair had grown up in a comfortable, affluent home. It also meant that his family would always take second place to his work. Alistair could barely recall one childhood memory that included his father.
When Raina had unexpectedly become pregnant, Alistair had tried to tell himself that he just wasn’t ready, as if somehow the passage of time might change his nature. The truth of it was that he was more like his father than he wanted to admit, driven and wrapped up with his work. He’d been busy at work, his phone switched off, on the day that Raina had lost their baby. If there was one thing in his life that Alistair could go back and change, it would be that. Raina had gone through all that agony alone.
The thing he wouldn’t change was letting her go. There was someone out there who could be a father for the children Raina wanted so badly, and it was only right that Alistair should step aside, however much it hurt.
He picked up his phone, tapping her number into the contacts list. He’d always thought that Raina would become a mother in less tragic circumstances. But the love he’d seen on her face when she’d shown him the photographs of her little girl told Alistair that she wouldn’t be bound by regrets.
That probably included him as well. And wanting to hear her voice, wanting to feel her cool fingers washing him clean, wasn’t the way to go. She’d asked him to text and that was what he’d do. He typed in a message telling her that he was home, and his phone pinged almost immediately.
You okay?
No, not really. The aches and pains in his body were nothing. The ache in his heart wouldn’t go away.
Yes. Fine, thanks.
That was the end of it. Alistair sent the text and then realised that he had a question of his own.
You delivered the application?
Yes. Heidi said she’d give it straight to Gabriel.
Good. Gabriel would probably have read it by now, and Alistair should give him a call.
Thanks. We’ll be in touch.
Thank you. Again.
That didn’t really require an answer. Alistair closed the text screen and dialled Gabriel’s number.
* * *
At the other end of the line, Raina was frowning. It was all very well to keep this on a businesslike footing, but Alistair seemed to be going out of his way to deflect any enquiries about his well-being.
‘Mummy...’ Anya was sitting in the bath, and she reached up, brushing Raina’s face with her hand. Her instinctive grasp of how Raina was feeling surpassed her ability to understand those feelings.
‘It’s just a text, sweetie.’
‘Who texted, Mummy?’
Raina made a face at Anya, and she giggled, splashing her bath water all over Raina’s shirt. ‘It was someone I went to see today while you were at Grandma’s house. His name is Alistair.’
‘Is he naughty?’
‘Yes. Very... But we’re not going to worry about that. Let’s get you out of the bath now and into your pyjamas.’
‘Naughty Alistair,’ Anya chirped, and Raina winced. She’d spoken without thinking. Perhaps if she didn’t say the word naughty for the next week, then Anya would forget all about that. If they did get through the selection process, she didn’t want Anya referring to Alistair as naughty while he was in earshot.
‘No, sorry, sweetie, I got it wrong. It’s really nice Alistair.’
‘Did you send him kisses?’
‘No, kisses are just for when we text Grandma.’ Kisses would be asking for trouble. Asking for the kind of heartbreak that should only be experienced once in a lifetime, as a lesson on what to avoid the next time around.
‘Then he must be naughty...’ Anya gave her a cheeky grin and Raina’s heart melted. Lifting Anya out of the bath, she wrapped her in a towel, hugging her tight. Kisses were off limits and so was any kind of naughtiness. The only person that mattered was Anya.
* * *
‘Is that Raina?’
‘Yes.’ Raina had been grabbing at her phone every time it had rung for the last few days, and every time she did, it wasn’t Alistair. This time was no exception.
‘My name’s Gabriel DeMarco. I work with Alistair at The Watchlight Trust, and he’s passed your application for your daughter on to me. I understand that you’re interested in taking part in our trials for the prosthetic limbs project.’
‘Yes...yes, I am.’ Raina held her breath, sitting back on her heels. Anya continued with the task of scooping soil into the plant pots that were laid out in front of them on the lawn, blithely unaware that her life might be about to change.
‘We’d like to explore that possibility a little further. If you’re still interested?’
‘Yes!’ She probably shouldn’t shout at him on the phone. Anya looked up at her and echoed the word, squealing with laughter. ‘Sorry...yes, I am still interested.’
Gabriel’s deep chuckle sounded in her ear. ‘You both sound as enthusiastic about the project as we are. There is one thing I’d like to discuss with you first, if you don’t mind. It’s a personal matter...’
Alistair. What had he said to Gabriel? Raina swallowed down her paranoia. She had no choice but to trust the man she’d once known so intimately. ‘You mean my relationship with Alistair?’
‘I do.’ Gabriel sounded a little relieved that he hadn’t had to explain. ‘Alistair’s taken a step back from the selection process, so as to avoid any possible conflict of interest. If Anya’s selected for the project, then I’ll be Anya’s doctor of record, and I’ll be responsible for prescribing the type of prosthetic that best suits her needs. But as Alistair’s heading up the project, you would inevitably find yourself working closely with him.’
It