Leaving without even bothering to bid her farewell.
Her legs gave out under her, and she sank into a disconsolate heap on the floor. That one night he had permitted her to sleep in his arms had meant nothing to him at all! He did not care. He truly did not care.
She did not think she had ever felt so wretched in her life.
The feeling of wretchedness stayed with her all morning. Pansy advised her, with a worldly-wise air, that some dry toast would make her feel better. And it did help settle her stomach. But no amount of toast could soothe a heart that was so badly bruised.
She did not even have the prospect of a ride out with the twins to cheer her up. She watched, enviously, from the window as they cantered away from the house on their scraggy little ponies, without so much as a backward glance.
The morning dragged interminably. She tried to read a book, but it could not hold her attention. She cast it onto the sofa cushions, and trailed to the windows to gaze longingly towards the woods where she knew the boys were playing. She was going to have to find some kind of sedentary occupation to while away the months of her confinement, she realized, or she would go mad. Already, she was marking off the time until lunch would be served. And longing for the arrival of the mail.
It could not do any harm, surely, if she just went for a walk? The day was so mild. And, if she was not permitted to ride, at least she could go by the stables and visit Misty.
The prospect of getting out of the room that was beginning to feel like a cage, after only one morning, lifted her spirits no end. She paused to grab a shawl and drape it round her shoulders, so that nobody could accuse her of not taking proper care of herself, took an apple from the fruit bowl to console Misty for not being able to go out and get some exercise, and set off down the stairs.
She was going along the corridor that led past the estate offices, when one of the side doors flew open, and the earl emerged, looking thunderous.
‘What do you think you are doing down here?’
She had never seen him with so much colour in his face. Not that it made him look any healthier than normal.
‘I am just on my way to the stables,’ she said, tugging her shawl more tightly round her shoulders.
‘Thought you could sneak past me, did you? Flouting my authority by going riding though I have forbidden it!’ He bore down on her, his eyes glittering with rage. ‘Sly! Like all women! The minute your husband’s back is turned, you think you may do just as you please! But you won’t get away with it. I shall have the staff watching your every movement!’
It was a shock to see him act like this. Though Monty had described him as almost apoplectic with rage over a disagreement they’d had, she had assumed he must have been exaggerating.
‘No,’ she said in what she hoped was a soothing tone, and holding out the apple she had picked up for Misty, ‘I was just going to…’
‘The apple never falls very far from the tree, does it!’ he said, before she could explain she had no intention of going for a ride. ‘You are the product of the most notorious couple of my day. And you are just like them. Lascivious. Leaving trails of clothing all over the house. Luring your husband into the stables, so he can satisfy your itch in broad daylight!’
Midge was so shocked by the way the earl was berating her, the spittle flying from his mouth, that she simply backed away, open-mouthed. No wonder people put up with his cold, sarcastic moods, she thought as she fetched up against the wall, if crossing him could result in a scene like this.
‘Mildenhall is a fool if he thinks you will not find some way to amuse yourself while he is in London setting up a mistress. Sauce for the goose, that is what women like you say, is it not? Plotting to get one of the stable lads to stand in for your husband, are you?’
She gasped in outrage, but the earl gave her no chance to refute the wild accusation.
‘That is why I advised him only to marry a woman he could not possibly fall in love with. To spare him this sort of pain!’
He might just as well have struck her.
‘He is not,’ she cried, ‘setting up a mistress!’
The earl flung back his head and laughed. ‘Of course he is. Did you think a man like him could stomach staying down here, servicing a plain little baggage like you, when there are pretty women available in town? I told him so long as he married, and provided Shevington with an heir, I would frank his purchase of whatever woman he really wanted. Deserves his reward for doing his duty to the Claremont line,’ he finished on a sneer.
‘You are poisonous!’ she gasped. Even if all he said was true, to fling it in her face like this was downright cruel.
‘How dare you speak to me like that!’ he hissed. ‘Get back to your room!’ He pointed down the corridor, and Midge, frightened by the malevolence that burned in his eyes, fled like a startled rabbit.
She did not stop running till she was safely in her room with the door shut firmly behind her. The man was unhinged! She had always wondered how on earth he could treat Monty and the twins so unkindly. Now she wondered if it was this kind of irrational behaviour that had driven his third wife into those affairs she was famous for having. Or whether he had imagined them all in some fit of insane jealousy!
And as for what he had said about Monty’s reasons for leaving…they could not be true!
They just couldn’t!
And yet, had she not always wondered why he was so reluctant to stay in her bed all night? He had let her think it was on account of the nightmares, but the minute there was a suspicion she might be pregnant…oh! She sank to the sofa, covering her face with her hands. Had he always looked on making love with her as a performance of his duty to the Claremont line? He had certainly ceased performing the minute Dr Cottee had confirmed there was no need for him to bother any more! And now that he had got her pregnant, he was off to London to find a pretty woman as a reward for having done his duty to the family name.
No wonder Monty had protested so vigorously when she had suggested accompanying him to London! It would be harder to trawl for a pretty mistress with a pregnant wife in tow.
Not that it had ever stopped her father.
She sat up straight, wondering what on earth possessed her to make excuses for Monty, even as he was on the verge of being unfaithful to her. What kind of idiot appreciated her husband for his discretion in setting up his mistress?
One who had always known he was far too good for her. One who had gone into this marriage knowing he was never likely to fall in love with her. One who…was about to be sick!
She retreated to her bedroom and her chamber pot, and when the maid came up with her lunch tray, almost ordered the girl to just take it away. She was in no fit state to swallow a single mouthful.
Though she was glad she had not done so when the twins came in a short time later. They took one look at the loaded tray and began to help themselves to her untouched sandwiches, stuffing some into their mouths and some into their pockets for later.
How often must they have been on the receiving end of one of the earl’s tantrums? Many times, probably. She only had to think of the dread with which they had regarded him the day they had brought their pets into the house. No wonder they spent almost all their time out of doors or hobnobbing with the lower servants!
She tried to raise a smile for them, but it was an effort.
And the boys noticed.
‘We know you’re going to have a baby,’ said Tobe, his disdainful gaze flicking down to her stomach.
‘And